Ranma 2 in 1
by Taxouck
Summary: Life at the Tendo household takes a turn for the weird at the arrival of Ranma, a boy cursed to turn into a girl when splashed with cold water - and it certainly doesn't help that his personality keeps switching between an abrasive jerk and the sweetest girl this side of Nerima!
1. Here's Ranko! Or Ranma?

Akane's focused gaze drilled holes into the cement bricks propped up in front of her. One thing she always liked about the familial house's aging dojo was the silence. Whenever she put on her gi and exercised within the training room's soundproof walls, it was as if she entered her personal little bubble, free from the passage of time and its obligations.

Her hand hovered above the bricks. She took a deep breath, lifted up her arm, and struck down onto the cement blocks, breaking them apart.

A piece of cement rolled away onto the floor, getting caught under the foot of her older sister Nabiki, who had just opened the sliding door.

Akane exhaled with a smile, wiping sweat off her forehead. "Huff… Not bad, huh? Huff…"

Nabiki smirked. "It's a wonder why the guys at school are even interested in you when you could snap their neck in one fell swoop, Akane."

Akane growled. This was the last thing she wanted on her mind today. "Why can't they just leave me alone? This is exactly why I HATE boys!" Great, now it was all she could think about and the peaceful atmosphere of the dojo was disturbed. She clenched her fists, biting back some choice words about the unfairer sex.

Nabiki knew of her sister's irritability and preferred to cut the incoming rant short. "Then you might not care much about what Dad wants to tell us."

Akane was intrigued.

"A fiancé?" Kasumi, the eldest of the sisters, repeated after her dad. Akane finished settling down on her knees in front of the table.

The Tendo father nodded. "The son of an old friend of mine. His name is Ranma Saotome. If one of you three were to marry him, it would breathe new life into our dojo, and ensure our legacy survives to the next generation. He's a trainee in the Anything Goes style, just like his father and I."

"Wait a minute, why are we only hearing about that now!?" Akane replied with frustration. "Since when has this marriage been planned!?"

"Yeah, count me out. I'm not interested in romance." The middle sister Nabiki said, standing up and walking away. They could hear her footsteps carrying her all the way to her room. Akane wished to do the same, but her respect for her dad forced her to squirm in place, staying sit instead.

After a short moment of silence, Kasumi came in with a question to save her dad from her little sister's glares. "How is Ranma-kun like, Father? Is he caring? Is he kind?"

Tendo-san laughed nervously, dodging the question. "He'll be here very soon."

The reply didn't exactly inspire Akane with confidence.

"Ranma-kun and my friend have been on a training tour all across the world," the father continued, standing up and looking over their koi pond garden. "Their last destination was in China."

"China, China…" Akane muttered under her breath. "Doesn't automatically means he's good. I'll judge his ability when he gets there."

"Father, how old is Ranma-kun?" Kasumi asked, trying to give her father a second chance to pull himself out of the hole he was digging himself in. "I hope he's not younger than me…"

Tendo-san laughed again, even louder than last time. "I don't know," he replied dryly.

The two remaining sisters stayed silent, stunned.

"I-I mean, I've never met him…" His voice cracked nervously.

Kasumi blinked slowly. Akane found herself very interested in staring down a stain in the tatami floor.

"Lemme go! Lemme go, ya big sack a' one hundred-fifty kilograms a' bamboo!" A shrill, feminine voice shrieked from outside, prompting the Tendos to attention. "Told ya I don't wanna any part a' this!"

They heard the front door slide open.

"It seems we have visitors!" Kasumi stated, jumping at the opportunity to leave the awkward conversation. She stood up and walked briskly to the door.

"That doesn't sound like Ranma-kun…" Tendo-san pondered, following the elder sister.

Akane stood up and entered the corridor just in time to see her father and Kasumi running back, terrified by the giant panda following them, who was carrying a person in its arms.

"Come on ya build-a-bear reject, can't ya see you're scarin' em!? Stop!" The lithe individual shrieked again, pointlessly punching the animal in the face repeatedly.

Nabiki's head popped at the end of the corridor, attracted back downstairs by the commotion.

Kasumi cowered behind her dad's back. "Does your friend possess a pet panda, Father...?"

Tendo-san nervously shook his head, stiff as a plank.

"Then what the hell is a panda doing there?" Nabiki asked from the other side of the hallway.

Her father shook his head once more.

The panda stopped two meters in front of the Tendos. It grabbed the person it was carrying and placed them down in front of it.

Akane glanced at who was unmistakably a girl. She seemed to be just under Akane's height, with fiery red hair held in a pigtail. Her clothes were simple and Chinese in design - a red button-up shirt over simple black pants.

With the panda not seeming aggressive any longer, the Tendo father regained his wits and looked down at the petite woman in front of him. Pointing incredulously at the stranger, he muttered a question. "You… You wouldn't be Ranma?"

The girl self-consciously looked away, a complete change in character from the punching she had done just moments prior. "I am…" The girl seemed to hesitate on the name for a moment. "Ranko Saotome... Apologies."

The panda growled and roared at the girl, who turned her head away from its ire.

Nabiki approached, careful circling around the angry panda. She threw an appraising look at Ranko. "Dad, that's a girl."

"A girl…?" The Tendo patriarch repeated in disbelief, his face covered in cold sweat. In shock, his breath got caught in his throat until he fell unconscious.

"Dad!" Kasumi called out, worried.

"I can't believe dad didn't even know Ranko-chan was a girl…" Kasumi muttered to her sister.

"Well I, for one, am thoroughly entertained," Nabiki replied, her grin apparent in her tone.

Tendo-san's eyes fluttered open as a cherry petal fell onto his cheek.

"Nabiki, that's not the place and time!" Akane reprimanded. "Ranko travelled so far to come see us, be serious for once!"

"Oh, Father woke up!" Kasumi said with glee.

Nabiki leaned over her father. "Hey Dad, couldn't you have checked whether your friend's child was a boy or a girl first?"

The girl in question fidgeted in her seat, caressing her cheek with her index finger.

"Saotome-san told me he had a son!" the Tendo father replied solemnly.

"So what if she's a girl?" Akane asked. "A guest is a guest! We should be treating her with more respect!" She turned her legs to face Ranko, putting her hand on the girl's shoulder. "Hey, wanna come see the dojo?"

"Hmm?" Ranko looked up at the dark haired girl.

"I'm Akane. Let's be friends, okay?" She offered a kindly smile.

Ranko gave her one in return, and the two girls excused themselves from the scene.

"Welcome to the Tendo dojo!" Akane grandiosely announced as she opened the door. Ranko glanced around the modest room before entering. "You know martial arts, right?"

"Well, a little…" Ranko replied.

"Why don't we have a little match, then?" Akane asked. "For fun!"

"I don't know…" Ranko glanced away, her hands rocking behind her back. "I don't really like to fight… but I can try if you want."

Akane grinned. It had been so long since she last had a sparring partner. She hoped Ranko was underselling herself and they would get to train together from then on.

...A little thought at the back of her head wondered why she had so readily allowed a stranger into her most private bubble away from life.

"Don't worry, I'll pull back my punches!" Akane reassured. Ranko gave a very gentle nod, and kept her arms held behind her back.

Akane started with a straightforward punch.

"Eek!" Ranko let out, jumping above the fist coming right at her by reflex.

Akane was instantly confused. She followed with a kick, then one punch on each side, finishing on a high-kick. Ranko dodged every attack but looked increasingly distraught with each attempted blow. Akane huffed. Ranko was… clearly talented. The way she dodged was firmly in the realm of reflexes, but the specific gestures and movements spoke of experience that didn't match the panic on Ranko's face. Getting herself caught in her own head, Akane continued her attacks until she was breathing heavily.

"Please, stop!" Ranko begged, on the verge of tears.

Akane ran towards the girl with a punch at full force. Ranko dodged once more by jumping above the blow — which came to lodge itself into the wooden wall — and rolling forward in mid-air until she found herself behind Akane's back.

Akane slowly turned her head around, finding herself face to face with a Ranko collapsing on her legs and crying. She pulled out her fist from the hole, looking at her dirtied hand for a second. What had possessed her to do that? She was way too competitive.

"I'm so sorry! Are you okay?" She asked in worry, dropping to her knees next to Ranko.

"I don't like fights… They're so stressful…" Ranko replied, large tears falling out of her eyes. Akane hoped she hadn't accidentally pushed the poor girl into a past traumatic experience.

She didn't know what to say to console the girl. She settled for saying what she wished she would hear if she was in Ranko's position. "You know, despite that, you're pretty good…"

Ranko sobbed, forcing herself to dry her tears. "It's okay. I'm fine."

Akane grabbed the girl's hand and helped her back to her feet. "It's gonna sound a bit weird, but I'm so glad you're a girl."

Ranko blushed slightly, glancing away. "Thanks… but why?"

Akane pondered the question for a moment. "Well, I don't think I could stand losing to a boy, honestly."

Ranko tightened her grip on Akane's hand nervously, before letting go.

Akane headed to her room, while Ranko stayed behind for a second, self-consciously glancing at her hand.

Ranma followed behind Kasumi, who brought him to an unused guest room upstairs. "Ranko-chan, feel free to make yourself at home here."

"Aye." He dropped his bag unceremoniously in the middle of the room. So that's where pops and he were to live, huh? For how long, though, now that the fiancée deal was off?

"Say, why don't you go down and take a bath, Ranko-chan?" She handed him a fresh towel she had brought with her.

"Uh… Thank, but no thank ya." He replied, pushing away the folded bundle of cloth.

"I insist," Kasumi continued, dropping the towel in his hands, "especially if you've exercised with Akane!"

He looked down, not wanting to make a fuss. "Aye…"

Once in the bathroom, Ranma started his cleaning routine by pouring a bucket of cold water onto himself. "Brrr!" He exclaimed. Too cold! He would have to mess with the hot water valve next time, for something a bit less glacial. Lathing himself with soap, rinsing, shampoo, rinsing again, then conditioner, he rinsed himself one last time, before glancing at the warm bathtub with apprehension. After all, he couldn't not think about the curse right now.

He loomed over the bathtub, carefully considering whether to dive in or not. He technically didn't have to, did he? He was already clean, he could just say he didn't need the relaxation of a bath. Maybe he should just leave now and continue to pretend being Ranko around the Tendos. Surely, any second he could spare in his favor was for the better. The more the Tendos thought he was a girl, the higher his odds of getting out of this fiancée deal.

Yep. That was the reason she was gonna go with. She switched to thinking of herself as a girl for now, if only to make sure she wouldn't accidentally sell her real gender away. ...Something about that last thought made her grimace.

She was pulled out of her reverie by the door suddenly opening. On the other side, a naked Akane stood, holding but a towel against herself. "Uwah!" Ranma jumped back in surprise, his cheeks growing red as tomatoes.

Akane raised an eyebrow. "Are you feeling alright, Ranko?"

"Uhh, yeah, aye, never better!" Smooth, Saotome, smooth. "Say, why don't ya take the room? I'm clean 'nyways, haha!"

Akane giggled. "It's okay! We're both girls."

Ranma laughed nervously, navigating himself to the other side of the door into the laundry room. "Aye aye, that we sure are!" He promptly closed the door, then brought his hands to his face. It was improper of a man amongst men to ogle women like that! He swiftly put his clothes back on, then ran to his room before anybody could stop him. Unfortunately for him, the glance he got to take into the living room told him his pops was about to spill the beans. How could he not have thought about that?

Akane calmly finished her bath twenty minutes or so later. As the evening was waning into night, she put her pajamas on, then got herself out of the laundry room. Heading to her room, she stopped dead in her tracks as she passed by the living room and saw a bald old man, wearing an off-white gi, a bandana, and a pair of glasses, calmly talking to her father.

"Ah, Akane! Perfect. Go fetch Ranma, please." the father Tendo demanded.

She rolled her eyes, but got to the task. "Her name's Ranko, you know." As she headed upstairs, she just got to catch the bald old man mutter something about an "unapproved" deception.

She headed to the guest room and knocked on the door. "Ranko, my Dad has requested your presence downstairs."

After a few seconds of hesitation, the door slid open, revealing a puffy-eyed Ranko hugging a pillow. "I'm sorry for what is about to happen."

The entire family, plus Ranko and the mysterious old man, reconvened in the living room around a few cups of tea. Tendo-san looked melancholically at the full moon, then turned his head to the assembly in the room. "Allow me to introduce them once more." He gestured at the stoic old man. "This is the old friend of mine I was talking about."

The man bowed slightly. "Genma Saotome." He then pointed to the distraught Ranko sat at his right. "And this is my son…"

Ranko didn't say anything.

"Ranma Saotome." Genma stated on her behalf.

Akane looked confused. Nabiki had had enough shenanigans for the day and had stopped finding them amusing for now. Kasumi looked like her heart was broken apart.

"What's the meaning of this?" The middle daughter eventually stated.

Genma seemed pensive for a minute. "Hmm… I don't know where to begin." He reached for the teapot, then stood up. "Why don't you take a look at this, for starters."

Ranko's face was that of total apprehension.

Genma slowly poured out the near scalding liquid on top of his child's head. They screamed in discomfort, and a moment later, to the Tendo daughters' total surprise, a boy stood in her place - Akane noted his sudden growth, he now towered over her by at least a foot, as well as his hair color, which had switched to an ink black.

Kasumi nearly fainted.

Ranma growled. "What the heck ya doin' ya glorified bamboo trashcan!?"

"Ah…! I am so ashamed…! I cannot bear to know my son tried to deceive you all…!" Tears flowed out of Genma's eyes. "Ranma… Your father is so disappointed…!"

Ranma grabbed his father by the gi and threw him into the koi pond a few meters behind them.

This time, it was a wave of contempt that hit Akane and Nabiki as a giant panda emerged from the water, Genma's clothes barely hanging onto its arms.

"Ya useless excuse for a father!" Ranma started punching into the panda's soft belly, which quickly prompted the animal to start fighting back. Akane thought that odd. Wasn't he utterly terrified of fighting?

"Father," Kasumi started, slowly recovering, "you certainly have… some unusual friends."

Tendo-san nodded. "I have yet to hear the full details myself. their changing bodies seems to be related to their dangerous training in China." He turned his head towards his eldest daughter. "Kasumi, go refill the teapot. It'll take them a moment to stop fighting anyway."

"I am…" Once more, the teen seemed to hesitate on the name. "Ranma Saotome. Apologies."

"It all started one month ago…" Genma, back in his human form, announced.

Ranma fidgeted in his seat. Already he could feel himself flash back to that fateful day, as fresh in his memory as ever. He didn't hear any more of the words from his father as he got lost in recollection.

It was somewhere near Mount Quanjing, in the Qinghai Province.

His father had brought him to the "legendary training grounds" of Jusenkyo - essentially, a plantation of long bamboo poles over a hundred natural springs that had appeared next to one another.

"Here sirs," he still remembered the half competent Japanese of the springs' guide, "you are at famous Training Ground of Cursed Springs, Jusenkyõ."

"Are you ready, Ranma?" His father had asked, omitting too many of the important details.

"Well this here don't look half as bad as I'd thought it'd be!" He had exclaimed foolishly, dropping his bag of provisions to the ground.

"This place very dangerous, you know!" The guide had stated. "Nobody use it anymore. Over hundred springs here, each one has tragic story with it!"

The Saotomes had jumped into place, setting themselves atop the bamboo poles. The guide had shouted about a story or another, but they had stopped listening.

"I won't go easy on you, boy!" Genma had warned.

"Just the way I like it!" He had replied. They'd traded blows in mid air, until a kick to the chin had sent his dad flying into a pond. "Gotcha!" He had looked down smugly at the body of water Genma was in. "Ya okay, old man? Age catchin' up with ya, maybe?"

The surprise at seeing a panda pop out of the water had stunned him and left him completely open for a counter-attack, and soon, he had been the one heading straight towards a spring. The guide had warned about a drowned girl and his heart had skipped a beat as his mind put together what were to happen to him an instant before he had collided with the water.

As he had fallen in, a weird prickling sensation he since became very used to had attacked him on all sides. When he had headed back out for air… Well, the rest was history.

"Ranma, you sob like a girl!" His father's clear voice brought him back to the present. He noticed the tears littering his hands. Had he really been crying? He hadn't even noticed. He was surprised as his father lifted him by the shirt and threw him into the koi pond. "Were you not prepared to lay down your life for the sake of the martial arts!?"

Ranma in girl form emerged back from the water, bobbing gently as he held his hands together and looked down. "I'm sorry…"

"That is certainly tragic." Tendo-san stated as he shamefully walked back to his seat. "However..." He grabbed the tea pot and aimed for Ranma, who quickly dodged. "Ranma, I'm trying to illustrate you change back into a boy with hot water!"

"Please, I won't resist, all I ask is that you use a less scalding temperature..." Ranma stated sadly.

Akane's father laughed, dropping a hand on Ranma's shoulder. "Well, now! Your problem isn't so terrible after all! You're still a man on the inside."

"...I'm going to bed." Kasumi stated, before uncharacteristically standing up and swiftly heading out.

Akane gave Ranma a mixed glance. She wasn't sure what to think anymore. She felt betrayed by the way he had pretended to be a girl, and therefore that a man had beat her. Yet at the same time, there was something about Ranma's behavior that intrigued her a lot. It kept flip-flopping before coarse and foul, that one she didn't like so much, but also a more modest, if extremely feminine version. Which, too bad she was a girl, she wouldn't be able to date that since she was straight. Wait, why was she thinking of dating Ranma? Plus, he is a boy, she can date boys! She frowned in confusion, completely lost in that jumble of thoughts.

She refocused on what her dad was saying. "Well, Ranma, the one who just left is Kasumi, she's nineteen," he turned Ranma towards Nabiki, "My second daughter Nabiki, she's seventeen," then towards Akane, "and this is my third daughter, Akane. She's sixteen. You can pick any of them as your fiancée."

Nabiki slapped Akane on the back. "Well then, a match made in heaven! Kasumi clearly doesn't want it, I'm not interested in marriage, and Ranma's half-girl, that's perfect for Akane!"

"Excuse me, what?" Akane blushed, still coming off her earlier confusion about the feelings Ranma had dug up.

"I mean, since you don't like men." Nabiki shrugged.

"Oh! Oh, that. Yes. Okay..." She thought through what was happening and her blush disappeared. "Wait, no! I don't want to be forced into a marriage!"

Ranma's expression shifted from meek to angered. "Yeah! I ain't signed up for that either!"

"Well, since we're in agreement, we are not marrying!"

"Exactly!"

"See? Perfect couple! They're already on the same wavelength!" Tendo-san said to Genma.

Fueled by pure contrarian spirit, Ranma glared at the dads, then at Akane. "...No way I'd want to date an…" words jumped around in his head in confusion, until one came out in his brain. "...an uncute tomboy like ya anyway!" For some reason, the words felt as hurtful to him as he had intended them to be for Akane.

Nabiki scuttered backwards. Not only had she never seen someone put their foot in their mouth like that before, but calling Akane a tomboy was a quick way to send her in a murderous rage.

The girl in question lifted the table and threw it straight at Ranma, who didn't even attempt to dodge out of guilt, it seemed.

"...He brought that upon himself this time." Genma commented.

Ranko awoke in her own room, a splitting headache blurring her vision. She focused her eyes for a second, recognizing Kasumi. As the pain flared up, she went to clutch the back of her head. "Oww…"

"Are you okay?" The elder daughter asked.

"I messed up…" Ranko stated.

Kasumi clenched the girl's hand in compassion. "I understand you have a lot on your mind, Ranko-chan. Please, don't think too badly of Akane. She's a bit prone to violence, but she has a kind heart."

As the pain faded, Ranma pouted sadly. "My name's Ranma."

"Well… Unless you don't want it to be." The eldest daughter replied, standing up and heading for the door.

He glanced at Kasumi confusedly. What did she mean by that?


	2. Wild like you, Soft like you

Akane finished her morning jog by throwing a few punches, even allowing herself a high kick. It was important for her to warm herself up every morning, not only as a martial artist, but also to prepare herself for the circus awaiting her at the school gates. She took a right turn back into the Tendo residence, and was surprised to hear that the two Saotome guests were fighting.

There was something about this that deeply hurt her. Wasn't Ranma afraid of fighting? He had told her so yesterday after all. Or had that just been a part of the farce he had tried to pull? Had he used it as an excuse to go easy on her, maybe? Were his tears yesterday just crocodile ones?

She kicked off her shoes in the entrance and walked to the living room. Looking into the garden, Ranma and Genma seemed to be fighting around the koi pond. Did they really want to risk activating their curses that much? Maybe it was their motivation to give their sparring their all. "Or maybe they're just stupid," she muttered under her breath.

"Saotome-san, Ranko-chan! Breakfast is ready!" Kasumi announced.

The two martial artists exchanged a few blows, before each retreating to one side of the pond. "...But stupid or not, I can't deny they're talented…" Akane mused, sitting down next to Nabiki.

"Alright, boy, let's stop for breakfast." Genma offered.

Ranma relaxed his stance, stretching his arms and neck. "Man, I was wonderin' when we were gonna be done."

"YOU LET YOUR GUARD DOWN!" Genma suddenly jumped out at his son and hit him with a low blow, causing Ranma to fall into the pond. "Rule number one of Anything Goes: anything goes! You better do yourself a favor remembering that one, you're getting sloppy, Ranma!" He crassly laughed, letting himself open for a counter attack which came quickly. With a punch to the leg, it was his turn to fall into the waters of the Tendo garden.

"Now look who's gettin' sloppy, pops!" Ranma taunted.

He received a panda fist to the face for that one.

"You know, boy," Genma stated as the two men, fresh out their bath, walked towards the living room, "I'll be sending you to school today."

"Pardon? School?" Ranma replied, holding his hands behind his back.

"Well, we are going to be here for a while. A true martial artist should know more than just how to throw a punch," the Saotome patriarch explained before heading upstairs.

"Oh… I suppose." Ranma had never truly gotten to settle at any school for more than a few months at a time. The longest he had held was back in middle school - but then again, it had never been his fault that his dad constantly took them both on the road. That certainly felt like a change of heart from the old man… That, or this fiancée business was a scam as usual, and in eight weeks' time they would be back to training around the world. Fifty-fifty, with his father making the decisions.

Nabiki came out of the living room dressed in full school uniform. "You'll be going to the same school as Akane and I, you know. It's called Furinkan High." She had apparently caught the conversation. With a spin and a wave, she rushed herself to the entrance. "See you there, Ranma!"

He couldn't help but keep his eyes on the middle daughter's school uniform. It was a light blue dress on top of a white t-shirt with short puffy sleeves. He pondered for a second how that would look on his girl form… If ever it came to that, after all.

"Wait for me, Nabiki! I'm coming with you!" Akane shouted to her sister from the living room.

"Yeah, no thank you, I like to get to my classes on time!" Nabiki replied back at the same volume. Ranma wondered what she meant by that. "Plus you need to show the way to your fiancé, you know? Anyway, I'm off~!"

"Oh come on sis, that's not-" Walking out, Akane found herself nose to nose with Ranma.

Once again, the first thing he noticed was the uniform she was wearing, identical to Nabiki's, of course. The two teens appraised each other in awkward silence. Ranma still felt self-conscious about his outburst from last night, and he couldn't say he had any idea what the girl in front of her was thinking about, but it understandably didn't seem positive.

Akane eventually broke the silence, ripping her angered glance away from Ranma and heading towards the front door. "Hurry up and get ready instead of staring at me like that."

Genma came back and handed Ranma a school bag, before taking a cautious glance at the clouds gathering in the sky and handing the boy an umbrella as well.

Ranma silently walked alongside Akane for a while, his hands behind his back. She couldn't say she understood the boy, but then again, she was perfectly content letting him stay a mystery anyway. As they got further, the street took them to a small river protected by a wire fence to prevent people from falling in. Akane saw Ranma fidget. He moved his hands into his pockets and jumped on top of the fence, carefully balancing his steps and resuming his way forward.

She sighed loudly, looking away from his antics. "If anybody asks, we don't know each other." Akane said.

"Fin' by me." He replied. "Didn't wanna get another table to the face 'nyways."

Akane seethed in silence. Even if Ranma had certainly provoked her, she couldn't say she was proud of herself for last night, and she didn't need to have it rubbed in her face.

An irate Genma sped onto the scene and jumped on the fence, shouting right into Ranma's face. "Talk to your fiancée with more respect, boy!"

Ranma took a step back in surprise. "Gaah! Were ya trailin' us, pops!?"

"Ranma, let me tell you something! This marriage is very important for the survival of the Anything Goes style, and if you ruin it with your personal affairs-" He was cut off by a swipe to the leg similar to this morning's, and tumbled down into the river.

Ranma crouched down on the fence, looking down. "What's wrong, pops? Panda got your tongue?"

Genma replied by jumping back up and attempting to swipe Ranma down with his paw, who quickly scuttered backwards to avoid the blow as well as the ones that followed.

"Hah! Good try pops, but you ain't splashin' me like that!"

A droplet fell from the sky.

Followed by a heavy rain.

"Well, so much for that…" Akane muttered to herself, grumbling .

Ranma self consciously pulled out his umbrella, even if it was now too late to not turn into a girl.

The panda ran back in the direction of the Tendo house, while the two teens pressed forward towards the school.

Arriving at the school, Akane gestured for Ranma to hide himself in a corner. "Wait out the rain here, then try to find hot water somewhere. It's not like you can go to school as a girl, now, is it?"

"Oh…" Ranma fidgeted, bringing his second hand up to his umbrella's handle. "Well... Why not, actually? Maybe I should introduce myself as a girl… After all, it would be easier to stay away from hot water than cold, especially on rainy days like these..."

Akane shook her head. "And let you into the girls' locker room for sports class? No way."

Ranma looked down at the ground. "I didn't think about that. Sorry for suggesting."

Akane rolled her eyes. She had difficulty finding Ranma's apology genuine when she still didn't know what was the deal with the way he 'fought' her yesterday. She decided she didn't want to think about it on top of what was about to happen. "Well, one way or the other… I guess it's time for me to brace myself."

"Oh?" Ranma muttered.

"Remember how I said I don't like men?" Akane headed towards the gate. Despite the torrential rain, a rumble coming from the front doors of the main building quickly pierced through the ambient noise. She picked up the pace, going into a full-on sprint. "WELL, I HATE BOYS!"

The source of the rumble quickly revealed itself to be a double dozen of sports club leaders running straight at her, their sport equipment drawn. They proclaimed their love for the young Tendo girl in an disorganized cacophony and aimed to take her down.

Akane dodged the fencing sword and knocked out its owner with a strike of the palm, blocked the boxer's punch with her school bag, sidestepped him and kicked him in the back. She jumped forward, stopped the hockey player's bat and sent it flying back into his head before kicking the football player down. The martial artists coordinated an attack, which she blocked by using the hockey player as a shield before sending him barrelling into the group, causing them to fall onto the ground like a pack of bowling pins.

Ranma was looking at the scene from the side of the gate, his curiosity having taken the better of him. One by one, Akane dispatched the assailants, far outclassing even the ones trained in combat sports.

"Why is this happening…?" The seemingly gratuitous violence caused him to fidget uncomfortably.

"Hey, Ranm… Ranko!" Nabiki shouted from a window on the first floor of the school. "Don't worry about Akane, she does that every day!"

"I'm not worrying…" Ranko muttered to herself. "I just feel bad for these boys, even if they provoked her…" She looked away as her legs started shaking. She abhorred violence. She couldn't stand it.

...The question was why sometimes, she engaged in it with glee.

With one last kick into an unfortunately positioned chin, Akane dispatched the last of the sports boys.

"Urgh… Honestly, every single morning!" Akane muttered, catching her breath while heading for the school building, not wanting to stay under the rain any longer, "I'm getting so tired of it..."

A small projectile flew right past her head. She caught it by reflex, and when she noticed the item in question was a single red rose… she grimaced.

Revealing himself from behind a tree, a young boy armed with a kendo sword walked barefoot towards Akane, melodramatically reciting a buddhist proverb. "The bell of the Gion Temple tolls into every man's heart to warn him that all is vanity and evanescence. The faded flowers of the sala trees by the Buddha's deathbed bear witness to the truth that all who flourish are destined to decay."

Akane glared intensely at the man, but Ranma couldn't help but think his feet would be caked with mud if he didn't walk out of the dirt soon.

"What a pathetic lot." He stepped aside and onto the walkway, to Ranma's relief. "Every single one wishing to date you, Akane, hoping for the day they finally gain this right by defeating you."

"Yeah, and whose fault is that, Tatewaki!?" Akane shouted, interrupting his monologue. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have classes to go to…!" She tried to run around Tatewaki, only to have her way blocked by his sword.

"Wait! Wait, Akane Tendo…" Tatewaki said.

Akane looked uneasy, expecting him to challenge her any second now. She really didn't want to waste any more time than she had to, but unlike the other boys, Tatewaki had a fighting chance, and that terrified her immensely. He actually had the strength to force a duel even if she refused, and it was only on his good days that he remained honorable about an opponent refusing to fight.

Tatewaki pointed his sword towards Akane and let it hang in the air for a second. She feared the words about to come out of his lips… And he surprised her by turning his sword to somewhere on her left. "Who is this beautiful lady I see cowering behind you?"

Akane turned her head in exasperation, finding Ranma shaking behind one of the pillars of the school gate. She rolled her eyes and let out an immense sigh. Hadn't she told him to stay hidden? Akane came up with a plausible lie as fast as she could. "...This is Ranko Saotome. She is not coming at our school," she glared at the individual in question as she said those words, "but her brother Ranma is."

Not wanting to be impolite, Ranma pulled himself out of his hiding spot and walked to Akane's level, before bowing, his gaze planted firmly on his feet. "...Humbled to meet you," he mumbled.

Tatewaki held out his fist in front of him, tightly clenching his fingers. He grit his teeth and looked up at the sky… Akane grimaced again as she noticed tears trailing down his face. "AAAH! SO HUMBLE AND POLITE! MY HEART ACHES WITH LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT!" He cried out. He walked towards Ranma, took Ranma's hand in his and gently deposited a kiss on its back. "I am the rising new star of the high school kendo world, bearer of strength beyond measure, I am the captain of the kendo club of Furinkan High School, my voice alone can silence a crying child, I am a junior in class E, my peers call me… The Blue Thunder of Furinkan High!" He raised his sword to the air, as if expecting a perfectly timed bolt of lightning to appear. When no such thing happened, he lowered it back down and clenched his hand on Ranma's. "Tatewaki Kuno, seventeen. You may call me Tatewaki, pig-tailed girl."

A tremor traversed Ranma's body from his toes to the tip of his ears, and he violently punted Tatewaki with a punch to the forehead. "Don't ya touch me ya womanizin' delusional two-brain-celled himbo!"

Tatewaki was out cold in one strike.

"Oh, great, violent Ranma is back," Akane sourly said.

"Violent? The real question's why sometimes it's like I can't even throw a punch, if ya ask me!" He crossed his arms with a huff.

As the rain finally abated, a giant panda arrived on the scene at just the right time with a scaldingly hot teapot in hand, and he tackled Ranma into his arm, carrying him away.

The two Saotomes found refuge in the P.E. Equipment Room.

"What's with this school 'nyways?" Ranma asked himself aloud, wringing the water out of her pants legs. "'ven that middle school wasn't half as crazy as the jerks here."

"He might be an idiot, but you'd do good not to underestimate Tatewaki." Akane said, peeking in from the window. "If you'd been a guy, I don't even wanna know what fight you two would've gotten into."

"I am a guy!" Ranma retorted.

"You know what I meant." Akane replied. Genma poured the contents of the teapot on Ranma's head, turning him back into his guy form.

Ranma grabbed one of the spare towels kept in the equipment room and started drying his hair, musing aloud. "If only bein' in my girl form was all it took to not be a guy." He frowned, wondering if there was more to what he just said than met the eye. Eh, probably not.

"So the whims of the Kudo heart struck again, huh?" Nabiki whispered, leaning slightly towards Tatewaki's desk with a sly grin while making sure the teacher wasn't paying attention to her. She found the idea of this hare-brained idiot being in love with Ranma-as-Ranko totally hilarious. She loved the tribulations that came with amorous relationships, as long as she was kept far away from the equation.

"Oh, you wouldn't believe, Nabiki Tendo." He placed his hand in front of his head, touching it by the tip of his fingers, and closed his eyes. "When I saw the pig-tailed beauty, her charms instantly tamed me, The Blue Thunder of Furinkan High."

First she had heard of the nickname. Last week he was still calling himself Shooting Star. Anyways, she knew of exactly the right thing to say to make the situation even more amusing to her, without selling Ranma's double identity, of course. "You do know she's gay, right?"

Tatewaki's eyes suddenly opened. "What?"

The fish had taken the bait. Nabiki's grin turned a bit more malicious. "Ranko. She's not into men~."

Tatewaki suddenly stood up from his chair, mouth slightly agape, and attracted the attention of all the people in the room. "HOW UNCOUTH OF ME TO DISRESPECT A LESBIAN LIKE THAT!"

A chalkboard eraser came crashing onto his face. "Tatewaki! Hallway, now!"

"...Yes teacher." He left the room under the laugh of his classmates.

A few classrooms over, the teacher finally got to introduce Ranma to the class. He read aloud a piece of paper he had been given to recite. "We have a new student joining us today in sophomore class F. His name is Ranma Saotome." He gestured at the young man standing at attention before the blackboard. "It seems he has just returned from a trip to China… So you all make sure to give him a big 'Nihao', alright?" He grinned despite himself, but the smile quickly disappeared as he realised none of the students found his joke funny. "Well, maybe not. Be as it may, both him and Akane were late this morning, so I'm afraid I'll have to ask you two to go stand in the hallway."

"I hate how frequently that happens." Akane muttered.

"I getcha. It ain't even your fault, really." Ranma replied at the same volume. "Why's that even happenin' anyway?"

"...Kuno-senpai. At the beginning of the semester, he entered the speech contest, and… he declared that anyone who wished to date me would have to defeat me in combat first."

Ranma slowly blinked.

"It's dumb, right?" Akane said. "Yet it is what it is I guess. It's not like their numbers are waning no matter how many times I whoop their butts."

"So, like, even beyond the small fry… Ya fight with Kuno every mornin'?" Ranma asked.

"Almost always. Thankfully I have yet to lose, but… Every time, he gets better." Akane explained. "If only I knew what to tell him for him to understand I'm not interested…"

Ranma stretched his arms up above his head, glancing down at Akane. "Ya think maybe he's holdin' back cuz you're a girl?"

"You mean like you did yesterday?" She replied with a glance of her own.

"The… circumstances were different." Ranma said. "But aye. I don't think I could fight a girl for real. That ain't the man amongst men way."

Akane giggled. "You? A man amongst men?"

"Aye, don't laugh!" He crossed his arms with a huff. "What, ya think my curse changes any a' that?"

"Speaking of, if we were to have a rematch with you as a girl again, but this time you don't whine about how scared of violence you are, you'd fight me for real?" She asked.

"Well… I guess? Ain't like I have much control on my feelings though…"

They heard footsteps heading straight for them. Ranma flinched as he recognized the doofus from earlier.

"Upperclassman Kuno!?" Akane exclaimed.

"You must be Ranma Saotome, right?" Tatewaki asked.

"Aye, that's me! What, ya lookin' for a fight?" Ranma replied, smirking.

"Is what Nabiki told me true!?" Akane's blood ran cold. She better not have spilled the beans on the engagement! "About your sister Ranko!?"

"'scuse me, what?" Ranma questioned, completely lost.

"IS RANKO TRULY A LESBIAN!?" Tatewaki clarified.

Akane's jaw dropped, Ranma's blood ran to his face, and the windows to the classroom opened with the excited chatter of an entire class' worth of eavesdroppers.

"I— I mean—..." Ranma's eyes darted around in panic as he clenched his hands together. "I, well, she… Ranko, she, uh… Does not like men, yes…"

"AAAAAH, WHAT A DISGRACE I AM!" Tatewaki shouted at the top of his lungs, prostrating himself in shame. "Please, do give her the message that I shall never pursue her ever again! I totally understand and respect in every way that a lesbian cannot be interested in me, and I offer her all of my blessings in her own love life!"

Akane didn't think the answer to her question on how to get rid of Tatewaki would appear this suddenly. She couldn't say she liked the answer, though… She definitely didn't want to have to pretend to be a lesbian at school. Plus, that'd require her to find a girl to crush on first anyway! ...No, wait, there was that weird logic from last night again.  
She decided to discard that train of thought by focusing on Ranma. She didn't think she had ever seen him that pale, like he was about to… aaaand he fainted.

Well, she was clearly not gonna get any schoolwork done this morning. She guessed she might as well drag him to Dr. Tofu's clinic to make sure he was alright.

Ranko slowly woke up in a room she had never seen before. She stirred in the comfortable bed, before stretching and taking on her surroundings more carefully, unfortunately still feeling a bit of a fog over her mind. Judging from the numerous medicine cabinets, she gathered she must've been in a clinic of some sort.

"Oh, are you awake?" She heard a gentle sounding voice call out. A moment later its owner showed themself.

A man (at least she assumed so, they seemed slightly more masculine than feminine) approached her with a simple smile on their face. They wore a simple black getup and glasses, but Ranko instantly recognized the outline of a bra underneath the person's shirt, making her wonder if her first instinct had been wrong.

They took note of Ranma's glance immediately. "This is your first time here, isn't it? I'm Dr. Tofu, they and them."

"They…? Them…?" She asked, still feeling a bit out of it.

"Yes! So, I heard from Akane you go by two different names, right? Which one would you prefer I use? Perfectly confidential of course, don't worry, nobody else is in the room." They said.

"...Ranko." She replied immediately.

"Right. Can I use that name for you in public as well, or will I have to use the other one?" They continued, a smile still on their face.

"No, no.. My… My name is Ranma…" He clenched his hand on his forehead as he felt a hot flash spread across his face before disappearing just as quickly.

"Noted as well, young Ranko." They said.

This person seemed nice, her fatigue addled brain thought.

"Apparently you had lost consciousness at school," Dr. Tofu explained, "I don't know the details beyond that, but what I can tell you is you are completely drained of energy right now. I'll call a taxi to bring you home, then you go rest until tomorrow morning, alright? That or you can stay here if you prefer."

"No… Wanna be home…" Ranko replied.

They nodded. "Right. Please, continue to rest, I'll tell you when the taxi has arrived."

She didn't need anymore permission to fall back asleep.

Akane was fidgeting in her seat in the waiting room. Her brain was still rattling over Kuno's latest declaration when finally Dr. Tofu entered, allowing her a moment of respite from her own confusion. "Dr. Tofu!" She exclaimed with a smile, standing up. "How is he?"

"Ranma's fine. They're just extremely tired is all," they said. "That must've been an eventful day at school to get them in such a state."

"I guess you could say that, yeah…" She replied. There was something about Dr. Tofu that always managed to put her at ease. She didn't know if that was simply an aura they had, or if it was the way their masculinity was different from that of a man. If that wasn't the cause of her sense of well-being around them, she appreciated it all the same anyway.

They took the seat next to her. "What about you then, Akane? Feeling shaken up?"

"No… No, I'm fine… mostly," she added after a moment of hesitation.

"I see." They took on a more serious expression. "Anyway, I think I'd like to see Ranma again once they're feeling better, if that's not too much trouble."

"Sure!" She said, nodding. "I'll tell him as much once he's rested, then!"

They smiled once more. "Good girl, Akane." She still melted every time they used this nickname from when she was a kid. "Now, you can still catch the last hour of classes, if you so wish…?"

"I think I'll go do that then. Thank you Dr. Tofu!" She quickly bowed and stepped out, sprinting back to school.

"Well hopefully, these two help each other figure themselves out," they muttered to no one in particular.


	3. Ranma's dream

Ranma was walking forward with purpose, navigating himself in pure darkness. The hallways of the Tendo house came into light, he continued his march on solid wood until he came to a door. But, opening it, he stumbled on someone he was surprised to see here.

"Huh?" he muttered, before raising his voice. "Oi Tate, the heck ya doin' in here?"

"Saotome…" Tatewaki replied, turning his head, "I support you, funky little lesbian."

He grimaced. "Hey, what gives!? I'm a guy!" The floor slipped from under his feet and he fell to the bathroom below with a scream, landing in the bathtub.

Pulling himself out of the water, he came face to face with Akane, completely in the nude, sharing the same bath as him. He jumped back in surprise, causing her but a giggle. "It's okay Ranma, we're both girls."

His feet slipped against the wet ceramic and he sank deep into the water. By the time he came back out for air, the water was cold and his skin prickled. He coughed and sputtered salty water out of his lungs, crashing on a sandy beach. Genma looked down at him, while a second figure further in the distance walked away. "You have disappointed me, boy. Look at yourself. You'll never be a man amongst men. Never again."

"Pops, just give me another chance!" Ranma cried out, hiding his feminine chest behind his arm. "I can still- I can still be…"

A giant wave came to pull him down to the depths of the sea, dragging him away under the scorn of his father. Slowly, he sank and hit rock-bottom.

All was silent. He was alone.

His back pressed against something warm.

He turned his head and met with his reflection. She looked as surprised as him. He took a step away and noticed she had a fish tail in guise of legs.

"Hello..." she said after another moment of silence. "I'm Ranko. Who are you?"

"I'm Ranma…" he replied. "What are ya doin' here?"

"I'm dreaming!" she answered with a smile. "What about you?"

"Eh…" He sat back down next to her. "S'been more of a nightmare so far for me..."

She grabbed his hand and held on it tight to try to comfort him. "I'm sure you'll be okay, Ranma. I'm sure you will."

"Thank… Thank ya I guess…" He glanced at her mermaid tail, intrigued.

She followed his gaze before looking back at him. "Do you want to learn how to grow yours?"

His heart rate skyrocketed at the mere idea of contemplating the offer.

Ranma suddenly jerked out of his blanket with a scream. His throat felt as if blocked for a second, until he managed to breathe again. A dream?

He swiped his forehead with his arm and noticed he was soaked in his own sweat.

"Morning!" Akane said, passing by Ranma in the stairs. She saw he had his towel and soap with him. "Taking a bath early today?"

"I don't wanna talk about it," he replied before speeding up and heading for the laundry room.

"Oh! Dr. Tofu wants to see you today, by the way!" She shouted before he was too far to hear. She didn't receive any acknowledgement of the message, but thought she could just tell him again if needed. She headed to the living room to eat her breakfast, she had to prepare herself for school quickly and she still hadn't got her morning jog in.

She was only mildly surprised when a panda came out of the laundry room. He did seem like the kind to not know you shouldn't bug people that are already in a foul mood.

The first half of the trip to school happened in uneasy silence. Akane preferred to avoid triggering Ranma's ire, while the boy had no intention of explaining his sourness. It wasn't until they got to the fenced river that Ranma found himself musing. "Want me to help ya dispatch 'em?"

Akane was intrigued for a second before she realized what he was talking about. "The boys at school? No way. That's my fight, stay out of it."

He slipped his hands in his pockets. "Jeez. Don't complain if you're late then."

Akane sprinted forward as they arrived at the gate and ran into the brawl waiting for her. A few hits were all it took to dispatch a good number of opponents, but they still were much too many to take down in a timely manner. Ranma jumped on the school wall to observe the fight from a vantage point.

By the time Akane was about halfway through the school front yard, she slammed the marathon club president onto the ground, then leaped above him, continuing her path towards the entrance doors. The sumo leader ran towards her while pushing his hands forwards, shouting about his 'body slams of love', Akane only had to side-step and trip up his foot to make the behemoth fall flat on his face.

Ranma walked up to the center of the yard, finding only a desolation of defeated boys. Though, of course, that still left one in particular that had yet to show up… Akane barely had time to catch her breath before his signature kendo sword planted itself at her feet.

"Should you find a wise critic to point out your faults, follow him as you would a guide to hidden treasure." Tatewaki solemnly walked up to Akane, his arms crossed. "I have made a mistake yesterday in making an assumption about the red haired lesbian's sexuality. Therefore I can only offer to ask: Oh, Akane, thief of the Blue Thunder of Furinkan's heart, I have not committed the same mistake about you, have I?"

Akane gave him the gentlest of smiles before grabbing him by the head and swinging him into the ground until he was about forehead deep in broken cement. She walked into the school without saying a word.

"I see," An upside-down Tatewaki said, a thoughtful expression on his face, "Akane is still so willing to fight me. Clearly this is her way of saying the date deal is still on, and it wouldn't be if she weren't interested in me."

Ranma jumped next to his head, crouching down. "Ya do know y'ain't ever given her a chance to refuse before, right?"

"Nonsense. She would just have not to fight any of us if she was not okay with the terms of the deal. Clearly my logic still stands." Ranma rolled his eyes and started walking away, but Tatewaki called him out before he went too far. "Ranma."

"Hmm?"

"Another thing I realized last evening. If your sister Ranko is a lover of the fairer sex, then she is clearly my rival for Akane's affection. Tell her I shall fight her next time I see her."

Ranma stomped on Tatewaki's head, digging him further into the ground.

Akane and Ranma didn't exchange a word for the rest of the school hours. Once they reconvened at the end of today's classes, they headed for Dr. Tofu's clinic in tense silence.

Ranma opened the door to the exam room and glanced around, with Akane standing not too far behind him. He vaguely had a memory of being here last afternoon, though he couldn't remember a word of what had been said, nor why he had been brought here in the first place. He did recall the bed though, as well as the skeleton whose hand was on his shoulder right now.

He jumped onto the door with a scream.

"Oh, excuse me! I didn't think this would surprise you this hard," Dr. Tofu stated, making the skeleton wave and bow. "This is Betty, she's pleased to meet you. She has a nice complexion, don't you think?"

Calming down, Ranma removed himself from the door. He had a feeling this doctor was someone special, but he didn't exactly get the time to ask as Akane butted in.

"Dr. Tofu!" She exclaimed happily and bowed. "Good afternoon!"

"Likewise," they replied. "No new injuries on your end?"

"No, doctor!" She smiled, fidgeting in place.

Ranma observed the scene for a second, starting to have a hunch of what was happening here. He kept his mouth shut, but couldn't help but let a smile slip out.

"Well then, would you mind waiting for a bit? I need to talk to Ranma in private."

"Hmm!" She went to sit down on one of the chairs, then took out some homework from her bag to occupy herself with.

Dr. Tofu closed the door, then pulled out a chair for Ranma to sit on.

"So, Ranko," they started, "in case I need to introduce myself again, I'm Dr. Tofu, they and them, and I'll be your GP for the duration of your stay at the Tendos." They gave a kindly smile. "I was told from Soun you have a condition, but under the basis of medical privacy I refused to hear the details from anyone but you."

Ranma raised an eyebrow. "'Aight I guess? Nice to meetcha. My name ain't Ranko though, that's just what—…" He probably didn't need to tell them he'd tried to use the name to lie about his gender to the Tendos. "I mean, point is my name's Ranma."

Dr. Tofu's smile cracked for a second before coming back. They nodded. "I see. My apologies then, Ranma."

He shrugged. "S'fine."

"As for your medical situation, do you wish to disclose it, or…?"

"Well, for starters it ain't exactly medical…" He scratched the back of his head, avoiding the doctor's stare. He exhaled, not really finding any reason to hide it - especially if Dr. Tofu was going to keep their word about it staying private. "I kinda got cursed back when we were in China… Would be easier to just demonstrate. D'ya have any water nearby? I'll need both hot and cold."

The doctor excused themself, and came back a minute later with a glass of each. "I hope tap water will be warm enough?"

"If it's good enough for a bath it's good enough to work, aye." He tipped his finger in the hot water. That should definitely do it. "'Aight then, here goes." He lifted the cold water glass over his head and poured it slowly on top of his hair, making sure to wet his clothes as little as possible. His skin prickled, and in his place stood his girl half.

Dr. Tofu's eyes went wide.

Ranma poured the other glass, turning back to normal.

They bit their lip, looking for the right words. "Where did you get this 'curse', as you call it?"

He lifted his feet onto his chair, sitting cross-legged. "Jusenkyo, it's called. Plenty a' cursed springs that do all kinda stuff with cold water."

Dr. Tofu nodded. "I'll look into this. Thank you, Ranma." They removed their glasses and wiped them with the bottom of their shirt, then put them back on. "That does help me paint a more complete picture. In my professional opinion, you're in need of a therapist. You seem to be under a lot of mental stress, and that would explain why you collapsed yesterday. Unfortunately, I specialize more in the wounds of the body than the ones of the heart. Other than that, you're free to go."

"A therapist, eh… Dunno where I'll find that." Ranma mused. He leaped out of his chair and headed for the door. "See ya, doctor!"

"Until next time, Ranma— Oh, wait, no, one more thing." Ranma stopped, his hand on the handle. "Do try to be kind to yourself, alright? No matter who that you ends up being."

The young man rolled his eyes, opened the door and walked away. "Man, what is it with adults n' cryptic advice…"

The two teens resumed their trip home. Akane had noticed of course that Ranma seemed much less tense, but that didn't mean she knew what exactly was on the boy's mind.

"Say, Tofu's a martial artist, ain't they?" Ranma asked. That was definitely not what she had expected.

"Hmm? How could you tell?" Akane said.

"I'm just thinkin', with the way they snuck up on me…" He hit his fist into his palm. "Takes some skill to completely erase your presence like that."

"Like you guessed, they're a pretty strong martial artist," Akane said with a nod, her thoughts bringing her back to the simpler times of her childhood. "When I was a kid, I used to constantly hurt myself while learning, and they were the one that took care of me."

Ranma observed her calm expression for a moment, noticing the same kind of glow he had seen on her back at the clinic. "Heh. So I guess I'd misread gratitude as a crush, eh?"

She looked at the boy in confusion. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Ranma stuck out his tongue playfully.

She rolled her eyes and spoke up, not wanting the misunderstanding to get any worse. "Okay, yeah, they're someone I feel comfortable around despite their masculinity. So what? It's not like they're a man."

Ranma's gaze shot up to the sky in thought. "...Wait, 'that what the 'they them' thing meant?"

Akane blinked a few times. "Ranma… How dense are you, exactly?"

"And what's THAT supposed to mean!?"

She sped up her pace a bit. "Honestly it's sometimes hard to determine who's worse between you and Kuno-senpai."

Ranma crossed his arms and walked right back next to Akane. "Well ya don't hear me criticize ya, ya uncute tomboy! Apply your own advice to yourself first!"

Akane's expression instantly soured.

"Well I must say I didn't expect you two to be back so soon," Dr. Tofu said, looking over a pitifully beat up Ranma laid down on a bed of their clinic, "but this is dreadful. So many bruises, the severe dislocation of the joints! How did this happen, exactly?"

Akane looked down at her feet. Ranma tried to stir himself back straight to no avail.

Dr. Tofu looked at Akane for a moment with a serious expression on their face.

"Well, he… he said I was a… You know."

"Ah. _ That _ word?"

Akane nodded meekly.

They slapped their thigh and smiled. "Ah, I knew it! These injuries have your signature all over them!" They lifted Ranma onto his legs and held him by the arm. "Look at the way this joint's twisted all backward. That's Akane's touch, no doubt about it!" They pushed Ranma's shoulder away while pulling at their arm, causing a pained scream from the boy. They flipped him right on his belly and pulled at their back, then cracked their neck to the side. "Reminds me of when you were a kid, and you brought me one new patient per week in such a state, hahaha!" They flipped him again, pulled on the back of his legs one at a time, sat him down and lifted his shoulders before dropping him back down.

"STOP, THAT HURTS!" Ranma shouted.

"Hmm? Odd. Where does it still hurt?"

Ranma paused and inspected himself, touching over all the places Akane had kicked him. "...Huh. Nevermind."

The first streetlights started turning on by the time they were done with this second, impromptu visit to the clinic.

"Bye bye!" Akane said as she headed through the door.

"Have a nice night!" Dr. Tofu replied. "Oh, Ranma, may I speak with you for a second more?" They said, lowering their voice.

"Hmm?" Ranma stopped next to the doctor, hands in his pockets. what else were they planning to tell him?

"Putting aside your own affairs for a second… Could you try being nicer to Akane? I know you're at a time of your life where lashing out is easy to do, but she's probably not the source of your problems," they said.

He rolled his shoulders, speaking out his mind. "'S'not like I enjoy fightin' with her… She just gets mad over nothin' all the time."

They thought for a second, searching for the right words. "She has her own emotional baggage to carry around. Feelings she spoke to me about when she was much younger and has forgotten telling anybody since."

He turned his head towards the doctor, intrigued. "'That so?"

"Maybe you two should try to help each other wade through your personal issues rather than let them constantly clash, hmm? You'll be surprised by how much you have in common." They finished with a firm push against Ranma's back. "Trust me, you'll understand soon enough."

"What were you two talking about?" Akane asked to avoid another silent walk. In the back of her mind, she feared what Dr. Tofu could've gossiped about her, but she knew them better than that.

"Meh, nothin'." Ranma had his hands placed behind his head, looking up at the electric lines. "Just told me to be careful with ya, what with your anger issues n' all."

She didn't like hearing it be described as issues. They were just temporary bad moods, not… Not something she had to consciously swerve herself away from, right?

Ranma interpreted her brooding as another bout of anger about to explode. He sidestepped and prepared his fighting stance with a smile. Not that he would _ hit _ her obviously, being a man amongst men, he only planned to parry her blows.

"Is that so?" Akane calmly asked, walking away without a glance.

He paused, then ran up to her. She turned her head to prevent him from looking at her face. "Maaan, your feelins' are so easy to bruise."

"Stop it, you jerk." She finally looked him in the face. "Why now of all times are you trying to pick a fight? Almost makes me wish you were your other side right now, I haven't seen it all day."

"What, had too much of lil' old me?"

Akane swung her school bag in his direction, he quickly dodged with a hop. "What's your problem!?"

Dr. Tofu was looking up at their clock, counting down the seconds to the full minute. "3… 2… 1… 0."

Ranma suddenly felt his legs give under him, refusing to listen to his orders.

"What's wrong?" Akane asked.

"My legs…" He was struck by a sudden realisation. Dr. Tofu's slap on his back. They had done this on purpose.

"Ah well." Akane crouched and offered her back. "Come here, we have to head home before Kasumi worries. I'll piggyback you since you can't walk."

"Are ya dumb!? I'm a man amongst men, ya think I'm gonna do something embarrassing like that!? What if somebody sees us, what if-" His frantic worrying stopped dead in its tracks as Akane sprayed him with cold water using a garden hose from the nearest house's front yard.

"Is her preciousness more comfortable if we're both girls?"

Akane walked him in silence, while he gently rocked against her back. He tried to catch a glance at her face, while mulling over what Dr. Tofu had told him. He wondered what was her secret she had forgotten about, and what exactly they had in common. _ "I'll understand soon enough, huh?" _ He asked himself. _ "Not yet I don't…" _

He pressed his head against her back and let his mind wander.

Akane felt Ranma gently stir against herself. She readjusted the way she was holding his legs and resumed her walk forward.

"Akane…" He said with a small, timid voice that reminded her of his kindlier side for some reason.

"Hmm?"

"Do you ever feel like you are not alone in your head?"

She didn't know what to respond to that.


	4. Kasumi's intervention

Akane woke up with a smile on her face, for today was a Sunday, and Sunday meant no school, no stupid boys to harass her early in the morning, no Kuno-senpai to hypothetise about her sexuality, and no damn possible excuse for Ranma to refuse a rematch. Her plan was to challenge him the moment he was out of bed! She jumped out of hers and rushed into the upper floor landing… Only to hear that the Saotome dad and son were already at it in the garden.

_ "Yeah, right, rub it in that you're okay with fighting everyone but me, jerk," _ she thought.

With a shout, Ranma ran up to his old man and sent a few blows, before dodging some back, then blocking Genma's fists in his hands. They jumped back away from one another again, and Ranma used a tree to propel himself with a jump. A frontflip later and his foot collided with his pops', they retreated to each side of the pond once more. Jumping high above the water, they traded kicks and punches, when Genma suddenly grabbed onto Ranma's gi and threw him into the pond, retreating safely on dry ground.

Ranma had already pulled his head out of the water by the time he felt the usual prickling sensation. "Maaan, ya always go for the cheapest tricks…"

"And I shall continue to until you understand the rule 1 of Anything Goes!" Genma replied, following it by his signature guttural cackle.

Ranma swam to the edge of the pond and got himself out, then pulled off his drenched shirt. He headed for the living room, and was surprised to find Akane was already up, sat, and grumpy. "Hi," he tried, only managing to make her turn her head as far away from him as she could. What did he even do to make her mad this time? He rolled his eyes and sat at the edge of the hallway, wringing the water out of his top.

"Have you no sense of feminine modesty?" Akane finally muttered.

Ranma cackled. "Yeah, right, the tomboy's gonna lecture me on that." He looked down at his chest with an almost self-satisfied feeling.

Akane stood up suddenly, clenching her hands. She walked up to Ranma ready to punt him for using the word again, but she stopped as she saw his expression was shifting to something more self-conscious the longer he looked at his bare chest.

"On second thought, I think I will go grab a new shirt." He stood up and headed upstairs towards his room.

She certainly hadn't expected such a quick change of heart.

By the time Ranma had come back down with one of his usual chinese shirts on, the rest of the Tendo household had dragged itself out of bed and into the living room, and discovered with glee Kasumi had already been toiling away on making breakfast for everyone.

Soun was slowly sipping away at a cup of coffee while reading the newspaper, not noticing the rest of his food was getting raided by Genma. Kasumi and Nabiki were making small talk about Nabiki's grades, and Akane was facing away from him.

Ranma sat himself next to her, muttered a "thank you for the food" and picked up his bowl of curry rice, picking away at it one small bite at a time. Out of curiosity he turned his eyes towards his reluctant fiancée, only to discover she was devouring her own food while glowering. He averted his eyes to avoid making her mood worse.

She firmly set, almost slammed, her empty bowl back on the table, before grabbing Ranma by the collar. "You, me, dojo, no excuses, no pulling any punches. Got it!?"

"W-wait, Akane, can I please finish my food first-"

She lifted him out of his seat and carried him away under the concern of the elder daughter and the indifference of the rest of the table.

Akane finally let Ranma drop on his own two feet once they reached the tatami of the small wooden shack.

"Look," she started, "you're in your girl form, you had no issues fighting your dad not even twenty minutes ago, so I don't want to hear any excuses. You're fighting me right now." She hopped in place to warm herself up then took on a fighting stance.

"Akane, I don't wanna do this… You know how much I hate fighting…" Ranma retreated, holding his hands tight.

"Just yesterday you wanted to help me fight the boys at school!" She shouted.

"I know! I know, okay, I…" He turned his gaze onto his feet. "I don't like how sometimes the idea of fighting makes me feel glee. But I can't control it, I swear..."

Akane decided it was time to stop beating around the bush. "Are you holding back on me because I'm a girl?"

His head shot back up. "What? No! That has nothing to do with it!"

"Then fight me!" Akane said.

Ranma didn't reply.

"Fight me, you jerk!" She repeated.

His expression instantly switched. He raised his hand to his chest. "Who ya callin' a jerk, ya half baked man-hatin' tomboy!?"

Akane's eyes twitched. She ran towards him and attempted to pommel him with the palm of her left hand. He grabbed her arm and deflected her hand above his shoulder. She tried to swipe at his legs, he hopped and avoided the kick. He let go of her arm and jumped backwards to avoid a punch from her other hand.

Akane went on the offensive once more, taking a running start and aiming a kick straight into his chest. In an instant, he put his hand on her leg and hefted himself on it, then used her momentum in his favor to direct a punch of his own straight towards her face. She barely had time to realize what had happened and to brace herself for the impact… Only to see his fist come to a sudden stop one centimeter away from her face, trembling.

Ranma's feet hit the ground and Akane's leg was allowed the respite of doing much the same. His fist was still holding the exact same position. His expression seemed incredibly sour. "Just… lemme…" He mumbled to himself.

He retracted his fist with a loud "No!" and turned away, holding his arm tight against his chest.

Akane let out the breath she didn't realise she was holding in, then started panting. "Ranma…?"

"Please…" He turned himself back towards her. "Please, I don't want to fight you, Akane. I'm sorry about this. I'm sorry about the mean words too, I don't… know where they came from."

_ "Do you ever feel like you are not alone in your head?" _ Ranma's words from last night appeared in Akane's thoughts as she looked at the meek, embarrassed girl in front of her (even if that girl was in fact a boy). Was that what he had meant? Is the Ranma in front of her the real one, and the fight loving antagonistic jerk was trauma-originating wicked compulsions he constantly struggled against?

Ranma didn't like Akane's look on her face. He felt small and scrutinized, like she was treating him as a puzzle to figure out. He didn't say anything, though. What could he even say? It's not like the comparison was that off-mark. He felt that way about himself often, too.

"Oh my goodness!" Kasumi said, having just opened the door to the dojo, her eyes fixated on Ranma's face. He raised his hands to his eyes, finally noticing the tears that had pooled there. "Akane-chan, what did you do to Ranko-chan!?" She ran up to Ranko and gave her a hug the poor girl couldn't deny recomforted her a lot.

Akane's thoughts came to a sudden stop. Her head swam in a confused slurry of platitudes about her proneness for anger. She knew now wasn't the time to say any of them - her voice latched onto the first safe-seeming thing she thought to say. "His name's Ranma, you know."

Kasumi seemed offended. "So you all say, but I've yet to hear Ranko-chan say it herself without the threat of coercion."

Ranma shifted in Kasumi's grasp, pulling himself out with a self-conscious look on his face. "A-Akane's right. I'm sorry for the confusion, Kasumi."

Kasumi's face turned pained. She looked at Ranma for a second, grabbed his hand, then turned her head towards Akane with a serious expression. "Akane-chan, could you leave Ranma-ch… Ranma alone for the rest of the day? And, please, promise me you will never force anybody to fight you again."

It was Akane's turn to feel small. "I'm sorry. It just, it felt like he was avoiding fighting me because I was a girl, and, and… And I let it go to my head."

"Are you even sure that was what they were doing?" Kasumi asked.

Akane sighed. "No…"

"Now, apologize to Ranma."

Both of the younger teens' eyes shot wide open. They shared an awkward glance. Ranma's mouth opened first. "I'm sorry if the way I am made you feel like I was undervaluing you for being a gi-"

Kasumi stopped him with another hug. "No. Never apologize for who you are." She looked back towards Akane, her expression making it clear nobody was leaving until Akane apologized.

Akane took a deep breath. She tried to get her thoughts in the right order. The least she knew is that Kasumi was right. She had gone too far. She sat down on her knees. "Ranma, I… I'm truly sorry. You're a guest in this house and I never should've pushed you into doing something that makes you uncomfortable." She prostrated herself in apology.

Ranma looked away, raising his hands behind his head. "C'mon Akane, 's'kinda takin' it a bit far now…"

She raised her head in surprise. That accent… She felt like by taking note of it she was onto something.

"Y'know, havin' a girl apologize when I'm the one that made her feel like crap… Ain't the man amongst men way." Kasumi blinked at hearing Ranma's words. "Get up. You're fine. Sorry for all a' that."

Kasumi put a hand on Ranma's shoulder. "What did I say about not apologizing when you're not at fault?"

He rolled his eyes. "'Aight, 'aight, pretend I said nothin', jeez!" He headed for the door, muttering to himself.

Akane raised herself back onto her feet, looking at him leaving. Kasumi ran after him, leaving her alone in the dojo.

Maybe she should let out some of her energy by training today, instead of taking the risk of creating another mess.

"Ranma!" Kasumi called out, running towards him. "Ranma!"

Man, he could already tell today was gonna be a bother - even beyond what had just happened, that is. "What, d'ya need me for something else?"

Kasumi thought for a second. "Hmm… Say, would you mind accompanying me to Dr. Tofu's clinic? I borrowed a book from them that I finished last night. I thought you could keep me company?"

He thought the offer through for a second. He considered for a second the peace of mind from not running into his pops nor Akane again for a few hours and that made the decision easy. "Y'know what? I'd love to."

Kasumi gently clapped. "Great! Let me get the book and we will be off."

Walking alongside Kasumi was definitely a different pace than with Akane. It was a more relaxed stroll through the town, with some starting-and-stopping to admire a flower box or to pet a friendly dog.

And, to Ranma's dismay, this only made him grow restless.

"Say, Ranma…" Kasumi started, breaking the twenty minutes long silence, "Well, first off, are you okay with me calling you Ranko-chan still?"

He felt an odd warmth at the back of his mind, but beyond that, he had no attachment to the idea. It wasn't his name. Why had Kasumi fixated on it? Ah well, he had no intention to get confrontational about this. "I ain't gonna stop ya."

Kasumi gave him a smile. "Thank you, Ranko-chan. Say, I can't help but think, were you ever taught to apologize on behalf of others?"

Ranma thought about the odd question, hands in his pockets. "I ain't gonna say _ taught _, but what with my dad n' all, I had to do my share a' it..."

She nodded. "I see. Don't worry about doing this with Akane-chan, Nabiki-chan, my Father nor I, Ranko-chan."

"...I'll try," he shrugged noncommittally. The silence resumed for a few more minutes, before he decided he needed another conversation topic. He leaned forward to look at the book Kasumi was carrying, trying to read its title, unfortunately obscured by her arm. "So what's this book?" He asked.

Kasumi seemed startled. "It's a…" She lifted the book out from under her arm and looked at the cover, then threw a glance at Ranma. Was she planning something? "It's a story about a young girl."

He eyed her suspiciously, straightening himself back up.

"About a young girl who..." Kasumi looked around, making sure they were alone, then whispered into Ranma's ear. "...used to be a boy."

It's as if the world around him went silent, all the ambient noise suddenly shut out as he focused on Kasumi's every word.

Kasumi coiled back, fidgeting with a strand of her hair. "When we first meet her in the story, she was just born. She grows up quickly, starts picking up on the words used around her. She's still very young when her parents have two other children one after the other. Her parents refer to her as a 'boy', but her siblings get to be called 'girls'.

"She doesn't understand the difference between the two yet, but she already knows she's not a boy. Kindergarten makes it very clear that boys play with miniature cars and girls play with dolls, but she always moves to the dolls. She guessed that made her a girl.

"So she told her parents as much. They were confused, definitely, a lot. They tried to explain being a girl or a boy wasn't a question of what toys you played with or what hobbies you had, but she was having none of it. So, they thought, what harm in treating her as a girl and see if she would ever change her mind?

"She didn't. She grew up, slowly learning that what made boys boys and girls girls was indeed more vague than mere stereotypes, yet her heart continued to sing to her that she was a girl. She was fine with that. Her sisters grew up, never knowing she had been born a boy, the Mother passed away… And the Father, in his grief, forgot that she had ever been a boy, his mind concerned with matters that worried him more.

"She took on the household chores on behalf of her Mother, learning along the way. She got good at them, and even enjoyed them a lot. It made her feel like Snow White, and she loved Snow White. She took care of her sisters and her Father, though she didn't forget to nudge them towards learning cooking and cleaning up after themselves either - she wanted to care for them, but she also looked forward to the day a prince of her own would come. They had to be ready to take care of themselves for when she would leave the nest.

"It wasn't exactly a prince that came. They preferred simply being referred to as royalty. The girl learned there was a bit more to the world than just boys and girls…

"...And the story ended on that note." Kasumi finished.

Ranma, who now held his hands behind his back, asked. "What? Why?"

"Well, because it's only the first book! Who knows when the next one will come." She smiled. "Ah, here we are, Ranko-chan."

Ranko was confused as the world faded back in. How long had they been walking? She placed her hand on her chest, and was surprised to find her heart beating at a much calmer pace than before.

The story continued to bounce in her head for a while. If the girl had been born a boy, then she probably still… had the equipment, right? Ranko thought that a girl like that would probably be jealous of her curse.

Maybe for some people it wouldn't even qualify as a curse.

"Do you wish to come in with me, Ranko-chan?" Kasumi asked, stopping in front of the door to Dr. Tofu's clinic. "You seem a bit shaken up. Maybe you should head home and rest?" She continued with the most innocent of smiles.

"I…" She tried to focus her vision, but everything came out blurred. She rubbed her eyes and discovered that at least, most of it seemed to be due to tears - though she could still feel a bit of a fog at the corner of her mind. "I will do that. Thank you for the walk, Kasumi."

Kasumi bowed a bit. "Any time you feel like taking a break, don't hesitate to come talk to me, okay Ranko-chan?"

Ranko smiled, waved, and turned away, heading to the Tendo residence.

Kasumi finally let out a breath as Ranko walked away. She pressed the doorbell, then waited for Dr. Tofu to open the door.

"Oh, hello Kasumi dear!" They said with the brightest of smiles, then looked down to what she was holding. "Oooh, and my copy of 'Throes of Passion', too!"

"Thank you for the read, Ono dearest. It was very…" she blushed like a schoolgirl. "Well, you know."

"Do you wish to borrow anything else from my collection?" They asked with a seductive wiggle of their eyebrows.

Kasumi giggled. "Oh, stop it, you charming royalty."

"Heheh… It's merely an offer, it's on the lovely Snow White to decide whether she wishes to satisfy her personal desires… and how."

"Oh, c'm'here you~!" She jumped into their arms and kicked the sliding door closed with her foot.

Meanwhile, back at the Tendo residence, Nabiki had just seen her little sister gloomily walk from the dojo back to her room.

It was bad news when even after spending hours at the dojo, Akane was still gloomy.

Maybe the whole situation with the boys every morning had to stop, let at least that bit of pressure off of her.

Nabiki walked to her room, closed the door carefully and pulled her private mobile phone out, the one her dad didn't even know she had. She punched in the number to a certain knucklehead and waited for the person at the other end of the line to pick up, leaning against the wall.

"Hi!" She started as the beep stopped. "It's me, Nabi- … Oh. Yeah, can you get me your brother? … Yeah, thanks." She waited a bit, twiddling her fingers while looking at her nails. "Hey, sup? It's Nabiki. … Atta, you're getting smarter. Of course I'm not calling you randomly. … Do you want the long or the short version? … Good, that makes my job easier. It was kind of a secret, but my dad and Ranma's dad tried to engage Akane and Ranma together. Didn't work out. … Oh, it's just that Ranko being a lesbian was juicier to tell you, in my opinion. And speaking of, since it didn't work out with Ranma, they're trying with the other sibling now! … Yep yep. You heard that right. Ranko and Akane are together, as decreed by my dad and the siblings' dad. What you do with that information is your choice. …" She smirked, satisfied by another plan coming together. "Well then, see you tomorrow at school, Tate." She closed the call and stretched. That kind of good will meddling definitely deserved a nap.


	5. The plea for help of a tomboy

Akane ran to the school terrified, hurtling Ranma by the hand. She had overslept! She never oversleeps! She knows what's waiting for her at school, why would she ever make that mistake!? ...Well, she knows why. The hour and a half she had spent last night staring at the ceiling, intrusive thoughts preventing her from sleeping.

She was so overwhelmed, though! Between the usual routine, and on top of that, not only the horde of boys, but Tatewaki's misunderstanding, and… and all that came with Ranma! She had her own stuff to deal with, so why did he have to appear now and be so… intriguing? There was a part of her that wanted to completely stop thinking about anything but figuring what was _his_ deal. He was strange and wild, and he was making her life as wild as him, yet she couldn't help but start to see a pattern! She had barely known him for five days, what was she doing getting in over her head like this?

Cynicism told her she only wanted to focus on him so she wouldn't have to think about herself.

...Stalker label be damned she would figure the boy out before she would think for any second more about the strange thoughts her engagement to a half-woman was giving her.

As they arrived to the school gate, she tackled him against the grid and spoke to him. "No asking to help me with the boys today, Ranma!" Her eyes wandered downwards at the tenting under his shirt. "Wait, when did you…?"

"Some ol' granny down the street." The decidedly female Ranma replied, staring her down. "I tried to tell ya but ya were like in your own lil' world, idiot." His gaze suddenly shifted to something behind Akane.

She turned her head around, only to see the sports clubs captains loitering there, seemingly waiting for their argument to end. She grumbled and shifted herself into a fighting stance. "Okay, who first!?"

Tears pearled at the corners of every single eye from the crowd in front of them.

Akane blinked.

"We won't fight you anymore." the cricket player stated on behalf of all the men. The baseball player took over the explanations. "We had a meeting. We all decided to choke back our sorrow… and accept your engagement to Ranko Saotome!" The crowd exploded into pained wails and tears flowing like water out of fountains.

Akane stepped back, words failing her for a second, before she was overtaken with the most furious anger she had ever produced. "You mean to tell me I have asked you to stop with this whole charade for the better part of a month but the MOMENT a BOY shows up in the picture, THAT'S WHEN YOU ALL DECIDE TO REGAIN YOUR SENSES AND STOP HARASSING ME EVERY MORNING!? HOW DARE YOU!? HOW DARE EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU!? WERE MY PLEAS NOT ENOUGH!?" Some of the boys were blown away, caught in the flurry of wind displaced by Akane's roar. "YOU COULD DISRESPECT ME ALL YOU WANTED, BUT THE MOMENT A MAN REPEATS MY WORDS IS WHEN YOU FINALLY DECIDE TO LISTEN!?"

"Aaaaah!" The sumo wailed, his hands covering his ears, and his weight helping him stay in place. "We said Ranko, not Ranma! Ranma's sister!"

Akane's words failed her for the second time in less than a minute.

Wowee can that girl pack a wail when she wants to. Ranma's ears were still ringing.

And yet, Kuno still managed to get through the noise a clear wooden clack from his sword striking the ground.

"Of course ya couldn't be far." Ranma said coldly.

"Whatever is not yours: let go of it. Your letting go of it will be for your long-term happiness and benefit." The kendo trainee proclaimed, stepping towards Akane and Ranma. "It has come to my attention, fair maidens of charcoal and fire hair, that your parents have planned a most respectful engagement between you two, after the failure that a more conventional one had been between Tendo Akane and your brother Saotome Ranma."

Ranma stayed silent, waiting to see where the idiot was going with this. He threw a glance at Akane… Funnily enough, she seemed to be turning a lovely shade of red.

"Therefore! Based on past clues and this new information, I have deduced that you, beautiful Akane, are bisexual! AND I OFFER THIS MATTER THE GREATEST RESPECT ONE HONOR-BOUND KENDO MASTER SUCH AS I CAN GIVE!"

Akane's lips trembled for an instant, before she blurted out a reply, her whole face painted vermillion from her chin to the top of her head. "I'm not a lesbian!"

"That you are indeed not, Akane! You are ONE VALID BISEXUAL WOMAN!" Tatewaki reached for a thread stuck to the nearest tree - wow, had it been there this whole time? - and pulled on it hard, unrolling a pink, magenta and blue flag with a very poor rendition of Akane's face sewn on it. Beat Ranma what that flag meant though. He didn't know of any country with purple tones in theirs. "And you have I's, the Blue Thunder of Furinkan, kendo master Kuno Tatewaki, blessing on this romantic adventure you have set on with Saotome Ranko! I shall pursue you no more." He moved to the next tree and pulled on a second thread - seriously when were these set up -, revealing a second flag, a gradient from pink to orange, with girl form Ranma's face as talentlessly depicted as Akane's. "Do you like these? I stayed up all night lovingly, and I mean that in a totally platonic manner, crafting them."

For some reason Ranma started to suspect these weren't country flags.

Akane felt small. So very small. Every pair of eyes was on her, judging, assuming, convinced she was one of those women-loving tomboys. But no! She wasn't a lesbian, nor a tomboy! She was a normal girl with normal desires, she knew that! She could look at a boy and understand that she would have to marry one one day, it was just the fact that it was happening _now_ that she wasn't okay with! Nothing more! It didn't make her a lesbian! Why were they all so convinced otherwise!?

She almost fell over as her knees failed for a moment. She clutched her chest. Why was her breathing so chaotic?

Ranma put his hand on her shoulder. "Woah, Akane, y'alright?"

"I'm not- Ranma, I'm not-" She gulped the saliva that was clogging her throat. "I'm not, I'm not, I'm not!"

Ranma's expression went sour. He turned his head towards the crowd. "All a' y'all better leave right now before I kick your asses one by one, ya hear me!?"

The boys didn't stick for any second longer, leaving only Tatewaki to linger. "I shall entrust her precious safety to you, Ranko." He bowed, before taking down the flags, handing them to Ranma, and heading for his classes.

The boy growled, but put his attention back onto Akane, shaking her a bit. "Y'alright? Ya seemed real' overwhelmed there, never seen ya in such a state."

Akane tried to reply, she really did. She wanted to tell Ranma so much. Explain, clarify how she was straight, remind him never to imply she was a tomboy, but… Her mouth was still stuck repeating "I'm not" like a broken record, unable to pronounce the words she intended to finish the sentence with. _I'm not a lesbian_ was all she wanted to say, but it refused, refused to come out!

"Ya know what? Forget school for the day." He grabbed her by the hand and pulled her along, heading into town. "We'd just spend the first class in the hallway again 'nyways!"

They walked in silence for a dozen minutes or so, wandering with no particular goal in mind. They found their way to the biggest river in Furinkan. Akane eyed the levee with an absent look on her face, before letting go of Ranma's hand, heading down to the river and sitting there.

Ranma observed her from a distance away.

He couldn't say he had much of a clue why that situation had triggered a catatonic state like this one onto Akane. So what if the school thought she was gay? Heck, they didn't even think that, they thought she was bi. Like… If the school thought he was a girl, he wouldn't really blink an eye. He didn't in fact, when they mistook him for his own nonexistent sister… But apparently being falsely labelled a lesbian was a hang-up for Akane?

If anything, he was more concerned that the engagement secret was out. Well, actually… It wasn't? It was and wasn't. They thought his girl half was the one engaged to Akane, for the strangest reason. Where did Kuno even get that idea? ...Bah, knowing the guy, he'd probably jumped to the conclusion _some_ way or another. Maybe Kuno heard Ranma was living at the Tendos and that's all that was enough for his imagination to go wild.

Speaking of, Ranma headed for the nearest trashcan and disposed of the flags.

He headed back to watch over Akane. She had started throwing pebbles into the water, and was moving onto a rock. It fell in the water with a respectable splash.

She eyed a boulder and wrapped her arms around it to lift it. She pulled with all her strength and managed to pull it out of the ground, to Ranma's surprise. She hefted it and threw it into the river, panting.

Worried that she was crying, Ranma headed down and approached her. Not like the water could turn him into even more of a girl than he already was.

Akane didn't want to have anything on her mind right now. She closed her eyes and sighed. When she opened them again, her idiot of a fiancée was making faces at her. She grabbed his head and slapped it into the ground for good measure. "Leave me alone!"

"Well, ya sure look grumpy." Ranma replied.

"What? Are you trying to cheer me up, maybe?" Akane growled.

"Shouldn't I?" He said, lifting himself back up.

She huffed and turned her head.

"Aaah, I much prefer to see ya angry than unresponsive." He grinned.

She continued to snob him, grabbing her school bag and heading back up the levee. Of course, turning around, she confirmed the idiot was following her, but she ignored him and went on her way.

...For about ten seconds. "Why are you following me? I don't need your worry. I can handle myself." Akane said.

"And I can just happen to go in the same direction as ya." Ranma replied. She turned her head towards him and scowled, he stuck out his tongue with a mean grin.

If this was his idea of a cheering up, there was much room for improvement. "You can be so annoying when you put your mind to it."

"Thank ya for the compliment!" He replied, looking very self-satisfied.

"No. I'm serious. Stop it."

His cocky smile faded. "O-oh. Sorry, Akane." He replied in a meek tone.

Akane stopped dead in her tracks. She knew that voice. That… switch? Was the real Ranma back? Was there any way she could confirm it? ...An idea hatching in her head, she waited for him to catch up to her and resumed her walk.

Thinking about it, Ranma still knew little about the Furinkan neighborhood, beyond the Tendo house and the school. He let himself be guided along by Akane, his hands behind his back.

"Say, Ranko," Akane said, prompting Ranko to attention, "do you have money on you?"

Ranko checked her pocket. Since they had ended up skipping classes, she had the money that was originally intended for buying a lunch at the school café. "A bit, why?"

Akane did a little fistpump for reasons that escaped Ranko. Was she really that happy to know they had money to spare? "Let's get something to eat, then! I'm starving." Akane said.

"Oh… Sure." Ranko replied.

They sat down at a park, with a bag of fast food set between them. They grabbed a burger each. Akane dug in earnestly, then turned her head towards Ranma. If she had correctly guessed, the Ranma in front of her was the more gentle one, taking soft measured bites out of his own food.

Ranma returned her glance. "Are we in a hurry, Akane? You seem to be eating fast…"

Akane paused. If this Ranma was the kindly girl she had attempted to befriend on their first afternoon together, the one that called herself Ranko, then… this probably wasn't mockery? It most likely was concern. "No, we're not… I'm just, you know… not the daintiest flower around." …She hoped she wasn't reading too much into things. The last thing she wanted was to let herself be vulnerable around someone that'd mock her for it.

"Do you wish you were?" Ranma asked, sipping away at his soda.

"Daintier? When I was younger, not really. I was okay with being a bit of a brute. I had to anyways, or the boys wouldn't respect me. If they didn't see me as one of them…" Akane sighed, crumpled the wrapping paper and fetched a second burger. "But I'm not seven anymore. I have to grow up eventually. I can't continue to just… punch what bothers me. I can't continue to be a tomboy."

"Why not?" Ranma said innocently.

Akane frowned. "Do you think it's fun to be mistaken for a lesbian everywhere I go?"

"I can understand that…" He looked pensive. "Half of the time people think I'm a girl."

She felt her fingers curl up in frustration. "What? No! That's nowhere near the same thing!"

Ranma's face scrunched up like he was deeply hurt, before his expression was replaced with a scowl. "Well, I also got called a lesbian even more than ya, but ya don't see me wailin' about it!" Dammit. Now _he_ was back. "Plus, ya think I can't understand how much it'd suck if they thought I was into men!?"

Akane stood up and glared down at him. "Like that could happen! They are certain even 'Ranko' is into women!"

"Stop sayin' that like that was my idea! You're the one that invented the whole sister story!" He threw the empty wrapper back in the bag and took the last burger, biting in it furiously. "And it's not my name!"

She shook her head. "Just a minute ago you were perfectly fine with it when I called you that, you bipolar disaster!"

His eyes jumped from his meal to Akane. "What!? You did not, I woulda' noticed!"

Urgh. She clearly had overthought it again. He was just an oblivious jerk, nothing more. There's no second Ranma, just a single one that sometimes fails at being terrible. "I'm heading home. Don't follow me."

"Not like I'd want to, _uncute tomboy_!" Ranma shouted.

Akane grit her teeth and ran.

After finishing his meal and throwing the empty bags away, Ranma stomped around town, grumbling to himself. He wanted to head home and take a bath, switch out of his girl form like he should have already, but it was still too early to head home without running into Akane.

"Pigtailed girl! Saotome Ranko!" He heard an approaching voice call from a distance.

He sighed, seeing Tatewaki running towards him. "Oh boy, what the hell's he doin' here," he muttered to himself.

"Saotome Ranko!" The kendo student repeated after stopping a feet away from Ranma. "The moment I heard you and Tendo Akane had stormed off, I knew I had to come offer my assistance. Where is your beloved at this time?"

"Just… go back to school, Kuno." Ranma walked past him.

That didn't deter Tatewaki, who quickly set himself besides Ranma. "If it was important enough to get you two to engage in the act of truancy, then it is all the justification the Blue Thunder of Furinkan needs to do the same. Where is Tendo Akane?"

"She went back home." Ranma grumbled, hands in his pockets.

"And you did not follow to do the same?" Tatewaki asked.

Ranma rolled his eyes. "We had a fight, okay? Sheesh, leave me alone."

"Ranko, my friend," _that we're definitely not, big guy_, thought Ranma, "Hatred is never appeased by hatred in this world. By non-hatred alone is hatred appeased. This is a law eternal. If you have left Akane in anger, it is your duty to quell your own and help her."

"Yeah, well that goes both ways." Ranma said.

Tatewaki energetically nodded. "Of course it does! I shall tell her the same next I see her."

Ranma thought the situation was worrying if Tatewaki started to _make sense_. "'Aight, 'aight, whatever, just gimme some time to cool and I'll go talk to her, big guy."

"Thank you, Saotome Ranko." Tatewaki bowed. "Now, I must be back to school before recess ends. I hope to see your brother and Tendo Akane there tomorrow. To the next time, honorable Ranko!" The kendo boy ran back in the direction he came from.

...Wait, Ranma should've asked him what the flags meant. Ah well. Maybe next time.

Three more cinder blocks crumbled under Akane's strike. Her knuckles had long since stopped turning red at the exercise. She stood up, a cemetary of cement at her feet.

Akane breathed slowly, holding herself against the dojo's wall. "Gotta snap out of it…" She muttered to herself.

She heard the door of the dojo slide open. Ranma, still a girl, walked towards Akane, before attempting a punch she promptly dodged.

Heh. She was no fool, he had gone easy on her just now.

He followed with a kick she easily bounced over.

Akane growled. "If you're gonna fight me, put some heart into it, dammit!" She ran towards him and tried a kick of her own he dodged in the same fashion. "How do you want this to help me unwind if you don't take this seriously?"

"Ainit' tirin' to be angry all the time?" Ranma asked.

"Shut up, idiot! My anger is _my_ problem!" She threw a couple punches he bent backwards to avoid.

"Well, if ya want some motivation to improve yourself, just imagine a cute gal like me tellin' ya you're cuter when ya smile." Ranma gave her a goofy grin.

The mental image made Akane freeze up for a moment.

Ranma pushed her on the forehead with his finger. "Gotcha."

Akane stumbled backwards and fell on her butt.

Wait…

Wait a minute this shouldn't have had so strong an effect.

She shook off the confusion and stared Ranma down. "Stop trying to act like I'm a lesbian!"

"Who between the two a' us acts like it's true I wonder…" Ranma teased, leaving the dojo with his hands behind his head.

The two teens took their turn taking their bath, with Ranma having gone first.

After thoroughly cleaning herself up, Akane laid down into the warm, steaming bath and did her best to let her mind wander away from her worries.

So what if her classmates thought she was a lesbian? So what if Ranma was gonna tease her endlessly over it? She was in a bath, and that's all that mattered right now. She was in her own little world of relaxation and she didn't need to think about any of this.

The image of Ranma in his girl form, with his usual cocky smile, telling her she was cute, came to her mind. It was almost a good image. Almost.

Blood rushed to her face and she hoped it was from the heat.

Akane spent some time in her room practicing how to smile in front of a mirror that night.


	6. Ryoga, the Eternally Lost

Life at the Tendo household managed to fall into a routine, for better or worse. Akane had closed herself up at school somewhat, preferring to spend her lunch breaks by herself - anything was better than to confront a school full of idiots who thought she was attracted to women. After their heated argument, Ranma and Akane mostly avoided one another at home as well.

A week later was when the first wrench in that routine came along.

"Ranma, come back here right now!" Nabiki shouted, running after the slippery redhead.

"NO WAY! I SAID NAH AND THAT'S FINAL!" Ranma screamed back, accidentally backing himself into a corner when he discovered his promised escape route was a locked door.

"All three of your shirts are in the wash right now! It's that or going shopping!" Ranma froze up. Nabiki still held the same ruffly pink dress she had been chasing after him with.

"I ain't wearing no girl clothes!" Ranma stated once more. He was a man amongst men, dammit! And not only was Nabiki trying to force him into a dress… it was like she had specifically chosen the most overtly feminine thing in her entire wardrobe!

Kasumi tried to temper her sister's meddling a bit. "Now Nabiki, you should probably ease off on our guest a bit… We wouldn't want to make Ranko-chan uncomfortable..."

Nabiki had apparently only listened to the first half of that. "You know, as a guest, your many hot baths are starting to pile up… It gets pretty costly pretty fast, don't you know?"

Ranma grimaced. He didn't like the expression on Nabiki's face. It was something… malevolent and cunning. Something that brute force and martial arts skills could never in a million years defeat.

"Now... will you wear girl clothes or not?" Nabiki loomed over Ranma, a grin rivaling her sharp gaze.

"...Okay," he finally conceded, spotting a worried look on Kasumi's face.

And that was what led to Ranma fidgeting uncomfortably on Akane's bed, while the girl in question eyed with restrained annoyance her two sisters looking through her closet.

"How about this one, Kasumi?" Nabiki lifted up a pale yellow dress with puffy sleeves.

Kasumi looked at it thoughtfully. "It is very cute, but I'm not sure it's a good choice for Ranko-chan's first dress? We should try to ease her into them a bit…"

"Why is it my clothes that are getting borrowed?" Akane growled.

"Well, you're the one Ranko-chan has the closest build to. I'm much too tall, and Nabiki is too lithe," Kasumi replied.

Ranma approached the girls timidly and blushed at the sight of the dress they were arguing over. "Oh, oh my…"

Kasumi turned her head towards Ranma. "Oh? Do you like it, Ranko-chan?"

"It's cute…" Ranma absentedly replied. Akane crossed her arms. She counted down in her head from three, two, one… Ranma's puppy eyed expression twitched and was replaced by a much grumpier face. "H-Hey! I ain't wearin' no dresses nor skirts! Find me pants, dangit!"

It took them about twenty more minutes of arguing before they managed to settle on baby pink overalls with "China" written in red on the front, set over a sleeveless orange shirt.

Ranma looked down at himself. He felt… stunned? Was that the right word? Something was eating away at the darkness at the back of his brain, like a purifying ray of light.

The chest was a bit tight, if he was honest, and he felt like his hips floated in the pants, but…

He headed for the full length mirror in Akane's room.

"Seems like it fits perfectly, if you ask me," Nabiki said.

Akane stayed silent, hands on her hips. Kasumi looked at Ranma with an air of being overwhelmed by emotions, joyous tears pearling at the corner of her eyes. "Do you like it, Ranko-chan?"

"I…" Ranko tried to say. "Is this me?"

"Oh my goodness… Is this happening?" Kasumi muttered aloud.

He traced the contour of his curves under the clothes. He turned and looked at his back. There was… something. Something there, that he couldn't put his finger on, that just felt different… Ah! That's it! "S'way too girly for me, that's for sure," Ranma stated.

Kasumi face faulted, her arms up in the air, with her pinky and index fingers sticking out.

Well, that hadn't been fully accurate. There was something here, even despite the fact it didn't match his tastes, but he'd be hard pressed to understand what. "Ah well, s'just 'til laundry's done, right? I can survive that." He headed out, hands behind his head.

Akane helped her sister back on her feet. "Are you alright, Kasumi?"

Kasumi blinked a few times. "Yes, I just… tripped. Goodness, when will Ranko-chan stop repressing…"

"Repressing?" Akane asked.

"I should go prepare supper," Kasumi replied, dodging the question and leaving Akane's room.

Nabiki approached Akane from the side and whispered, "So Kasumi's noticed it too, huh?"

"Noticed what?" Akane asked. "You mean the two modes?"

"Not what I had in mind, but now you've gotten me intrigued." Nabiki pulled out a pencil and a pocket notebook.

"Ah, so you're trying to figure Ranma out too?" Akane said.

"He's a fun study subject." Nabiki smiled darkly.

"Knowing you, you'll have him down and categorized by the end of the month." _And you'll keep it aaaaall to yourself too, _Akane thought. She knew how her sister worked. "Anyway, one thing I've noticed with Ranma is that he tends to switch around between being his usual jerk self and acting all soft and cutesy. I don't think he does it consciously."

Nabiki jotted it all down in a couple seconds. "If that's true, then that interacts pretty hilariously with his other condition..."

"There's another thing?" Akane looked up at her sister, one eyebrow raised.

"20,000 yen if you wanna know more~" Nabiki stuck out her tongue and walked back to her own room, flipping the placard on the door to 'NO ENTRY'.

No way she was gonna pay. Not yet at least. She wanted to try figuring it out alone first. Nabiki probably just meant the Jusenkyo curse anyway, right?

Akane noticed a higher frequency of appearances from soft Ranma than usual after observing him throughout the rest of the day.

The second complication in the routine came the next day, right as the bell school rang the end of their afternoon classes.

Ranma was heading out the school, walking through the courtyard with Akane next to him, when he spotted a young boy in yellow at the gate, holding another student by his shirt. Intrigued by the commotion, he weaved through the crowd and tried to approach, but the moment the boy spotted him, he jumped in the air and headed to strike Ranma with a bamboo umbrella. "RANMAAAA! PREPARE TO DIE!"

Ranma backflipped to dodge the umbrella, which lodged itself into the ground. Energy poured out and the hard cement crumbled into mere pebbles and dust, leaving the umbrella boy kneeling in a crater of his own creation.

The boy glanced up at Ranma with anger on his face. Dark hair, brown eyes, he was wearing a yellow bandana with black spots and wore on his back a heavy-looking survival backpack. Ranma observed him curiously. His face felt familiar, but he just couldn't quite place him, like it was stuck somewhere deep in his memories… The boy grinned. "I've been looking for you, Ranma!" He stood back up and took a fighting stance, pointing his umbrella towards Ranma. "Still as good at running away as ever, huh?"

"Do you know who this is, Ranma?" Akane whispered to her fiancée.

"Hmm, I'm sure I do, but I can't recall from where… Lemme think…" Ranma pinched the bridge of his nose. Childhood? Teenhood? Worldwide travel? During which era of his life did he ever meet a guy as strong as this one? Not that he remembered much of anything of his childhood beyond one friend, so if they had met then, it was probably a lost cause. Early teenhood then? Somewhere around middle school - "Ah ha! Ryoga!" he said with a smile, clacking his fingers. "Matsuribi Buta Junior High School for boys! That's where ya from! Ryoga… somethin'..."

"Ryoga Hibiki!" Ryoga stated, sliding next to Ranma with a menacing look on his face.

Right! The memories flooded back in, now. While their friendship had started over a few snatched lunch meals - damn junior high school never had enough lunches for everyone, causing brawls to happen over melon bread - they had become fast friends over two traits they shared: they were both martial artists, and they _hated_ Matsurubi Buta Junior High. The place was miserable not only in the lax administration, but further yet, there was something unsettling they both agreed on about being forced into a boys-only school-

...Wait a minute.

How did Ranma ever forget that? Had he repressed this memory for some reason? Why?

Ah, right, because it was unbecoming of a man amongst men to be uncomfortable in a boys school. But what was Ryoga's reason, then?

"Stop daydreaming and FIGHT ME!" Ryoga stepped backwards and sent his umbrella spinning straight towards Ranma, forcing the crowd of students behind him into a frantic run. "REVENGE!"

Ranma leaned to the side to avoid the weapon. "Revenge? What for? I thought we were buddies!" He leaned in the opposite direction to avoid the umbrella again as it flew back towards Ryoga like a boomerang.

Ryoga caught the umbrella in mid-air, holding it up above his head. "I'm going to ruin your happiness like you ruined mine, Ranma!"

"My… happiness?" A stupid joke came to Ranma's mind. He turned to Akane. "Wait, do I even have any a' that?"

"...Idiot," she replied. He stuck his tongue out playfully. "What did you do to get him this mad anyways?"

Ranma crossed his arms. "I mean, b'sides the bread stuff? No clue."

"Bread stuff?" Akane asked.

"Long friendship-forgin' story," he answered, before turning his head to Ryoga again. "Hey, it's not about the bread, izit?"

"What!? Of course it's not! Stop stalling and fight me, Ranma!" Ryoga shouted before charging straight for him, brandishing his umbrella. He swiped once at Ranma's chest, then aimed for his feet repeatedly, which Ranma avoided through a series of elaborate backflips.

Ranma bounced up in the air. Ryoga followed him quickly. "What's it about, then?"

"Because of you… Because of you, my life has become hell!" Ryoga tried to hit him with his umbrella again, and Ranma let himself be carried by the displaced air from the strike to reposition himself to Ryoga's side.

The two boys dropped back to the ground. "Oi, can't ya drop the mystery and gimme a straightforward answer already!?"

"You wouldn't be able to even conceive of the depth of my suffering!" Ryoga deployed his umbrella again and threw out another boomerang attack.

"Answer's no, then," Ranma sighed, jumping above the umbrella. What else could have made Ryoga suffer, then? His legendarily awful sense of direction? Well, for sure, but he had that even before Ranma met him. How'd he even find his way to Furinkan, actually?

"Waaait!" a nasal voice rang out from the school, prompting Ranma and Ryoga to a stop. Nabiki ran towards the crowd of students gathered around the two fighters, and paused for a moment to catch her breath. "Everyone, I'm taking all bets! Three to two on Ranma!"

The students swarmed around her while holding up their pocket money, screaming numbers and Ranma and Ryoga's names over one another.

Akane pinched the bridge of her nose and focused herself back on the fight.

Ryoga was swiping away at Ranma with his umbrella again, who seemed ever on the defensive. Well, he had been dodging for the entire fight so far, so it shouldn't have been odd, but… There was something. The dodges started to morph from a trained reading of his opponent's moves to something more akin to reflexes. Ranma's face was slowly going numb with each attempted strike. Was he starting to get bored with the fight? Or…

"Ryoga, I…" Ranma muttered in a meek voice. Akane's instinct was right, Ranma's other mode had switched in! "I've missed you so much."

"Huh?" Ryoga paused for a second, confusion apparent on his face.

And then Ranma hugged him tight.

The crowd went wild with conspiratory whispering and murmuring.

Ranma let go of him and started swinging his hands behind his back. "I'm sorry for whatever harm I caused you, Ryoga. Please, I wish to help, if only you would tell me what I did..."

Ryoga grinded his teeth for a moment, clutching his umbrella tight… before sighing deeply, losing all his combative attitude. He discarded his umbrella and crossed his arms. "Dammit Ranma, you haven't changed at all."

Ranma giggled and tilted his head to the side with a smile. "You neither, Ryoga."

Ryoga replied with a smile of his own before quickly replacing it with a serious expression. "When I was told you went on a training tour around the world, I tried to follow you, Ranma. I didn't want to lose my only buddy." He clutched his hand. "But then… But then…! On my way to finding you…! Aaah, I cannot even say it! I became so fixated! And it ruined my life! You ruined my life, by being such a friend that I couldn't imagine my life without you! And all I received for my troubles is pain and sorrow!"

Akane looked over at Ranma and winced as he clutched his head, stumbling backwards. The tearful reunion was about to be interrupted. "Oi, if ya went lookin' for me that's your own dang fault what ya stumbled upon while traveling! I ain't caused your garbage sense of direction!"

Ryoga grimaced and picked his umbrella back up. "Now, fight me for real, Ranma! No more dodging!"

"I ain't gonna be accused of somethin' I didn't cause, ya earthbound astronaut!" Ranma stomped on Ryoga's head and ran away from the school grounds.

"Ah, god dammit you slippery - COME BACK HERE!" Ryoga screamed, giving chase.

Akane sighed. So did Nabiki. "Well, looks like we're not gonna be here to witness the end of this fight. Keep your money, everyone."

The dejected crowd pronounced a collective "Awww…" and continued on their way home.

Nabiki approached her little sister. "I see what you meant by the switch thing."

"I'm going after them," Akane said.

"Sure, knock yourself out. I'll tell Kasumi not to wait for you for supper." And on that note, Nabiki walked away.

Akane ran in the direction she last saw the two boys head in.

"WAIT UP, RANMA!" the lost boy shouted, doing his best to follow him through the tight alleyways of Furinkan.

"Ah, will ya give it a rest!? I don't wanna have to knock ya out just because ya think I caused all the problems in your life!" Had Ryoga ever been that persistent!? Oh, wait, he totally had been. There was no way this fight was ending before one of them two was knocked out, was there? Ranma jumped onto the nearest roof and headed for a park he saw not too far from there. If they were going to continue fighting, they needed an open field, and that's the closest they were gonna get in the middle of the city, bar returning to school. "We'll fight in there!" he said, pointing out the park to his friend.

The two boys settled in the middle of a grassy area with a few trees around them, as well as a pond behind Ranma he eyed uneasily.

"DIE!" Ryoga used his umbrella as a pole and propulsed himself towards Ranma, aiming a kick. Ranma dodged, but the moment Ryoga's feet hit the ground he twisted around and swiped his umbrella, which grazed Ranma and tore a cut through his shirt.

"God dangit! I already only had three!" Ranma complained. He punched Ryoga right in the jaw and sent him flying backwards.

Ryoga managed to recover himself and land on his feet, only to see Ranma jump into a tree. "Get down from there!"

Ranma stuck out his tongue.

Ryoga growled with rage and ran towards the tree. He gripped the trunk with his bare hands and started pulling. The tree shook.

"Woah, Ryoga, wait!" a shaken Ranma said as Ryoga pulled the tree out of the ground and jumped high into the air, aiming to dunk it into the pond.

"DIEEE!" Ryoga threw the tree with all his force, sending it splashing into the pond with an unlucky Ranma on it. Ryoga barely had the time to grab his umbrella to protect himself from a dousing.

Akane saw a column of water rise high above the treeline from the nearest park. Well, she knew where they were now.

Ranma jumped out of the pool and delivered a high kick right into Ryoga's cheek. "God dammit, dammit, dammit! Why d'ya have to choose to do _that_ of all things!?"

Ryoga stepped back and choked on his words, half-confusedly gesturing at Ranma's exposed chest. "R...Ranma!?"

"Who else, ya idiot!?" Ranma replied.

Akane ran onto the scene. "Oh my god, Ranma, your shirt!"

He looked down and, realising the problem, self-consciously hid his breasts behind his arm. He felt his combativity run out, and be replaced by his desire to avoid fighting.

Ryoga stayed silent.

"I'm… I'm sorry, Ryoga. We shouldn't have fought like this," Ranma said. "I don't know what happened to you, only that it was bad enough to make you want to kill me… I shouldn't have responded with punches and kicks. I hate fighting. And I hate that… you had to see me like this."

"Is… Is this some kind of twisted joke!?" Ryoga choke back tears. "You're standing there in that… cute, huggable body!" He clenched his fists so tightly his umbrella's handle broke. He started pulling out layered bandanas off of his head, whipping them clockwise in his hands until centrifugal force made them as sharp as razors. "And you claim you hate it!? That's absurd!" He threw them straight at the two girls.

"Kyaaa!" Ranma screamed, dodging them by pure instinct.

Akane wasn't so lucky as her hair was suddenly cut right above her ribbon.

The razor bandana continued its course straight until it lodged itself into a tree.

Akane completely stopped.

Her hair.

She had been growing it out for years in an attempt to be more feminine. Less of a tomboy.

And in just one strike, of just one fight, of just two idiots, that shouldn't have anything to do with her, that should never have had anything to do with her, all that effort was thrown away.

Ranma and Ryoga had all but stopped too, gazing at her intensely.

She touched at the back of her head to assess how much she had lost. It barely reached the midway point of her neck anymore. She looked behind her on the ground and saw the cleanly snipped part sitting there, lifeless.


	7. Ryoga, the Eternally Unlucky

All three of the teens completely froze.

Ranko was the first to move, bringing her hand to her mouth in shock. "Akane…!"

Ranko - no, Ranma couldn't explain it, but he had an intuitive understanding of how precious a girl's hair was. Why wouldn't he? As a man amongst men, he was versed in women's woes so he could live to serve. That was his role as a man, to make sure no woman would come to harm under his watch. So of course he understood! ...The fact that Ryoga seemed to understand as well, as he was also staying silent, eluded him, though.

"'Kane…" he repeated, slowly approaching the catatonic girl…

Akane lifted up her hand far above her head.

A sharp slap rang out throughout the park.

Ranma held his hand against his bruised cheek as Akane walked towards a shell-shocked Ryoga.

Another slap.

Akane walked away.

"...We should probably stop fighting," the bandana boy said.

"Let's," Ranma replied. He looked around for a place to sit, and made his way to a bench he spotted, Ryoga following him.

"So… cold water turns you into a… a girl?" his friend asked while sitting down.

"That it does." Ranma dropped himself into the seat, resting his arm over the back of the bench.

Ryoga choked up. "You've always been the lucky one out of us two, huh?"

"'scuse me?" Ranma asked.

"Don't play dumb, you know what I mean." Ryoga replied.

"Yeah, right, what kinda man would wanna be a g—" Ranma stopped himself, remembering Kasumi's storybook. "Okay, maybe some _ other _ guys would wanna be girls, but not me. I'm a man amongst men, y'know!"

"Cast pearls before swine..." Ryoga said, casting his head downwards.

Ranma shrugged. "It's what it is, Ryoga. I ain't chose my curse."

"Can you please not call it a curse?" Ryoga snappily replied, his head still pointed towards the ground.

Ranma squinted, bending forward to try to catch a glance of his friend's face. Was he… crying? His heart swelled with memories of the two of them curled up against a wall, somewhere in Matsuburi Buta Junior High. Talking about how girls had it easier, or something of that nature. Typical teenage boy thoughts, but… Well, had it meant something deeper for Ryoga? "I'm sorry if the question is weird," he started with a soft tone, trying to comfort his friend, "but do you wish you were a girl?"

Ryoga jolted out of his seat, the pupils in his eyes narrowing. "What!? No! Why would I want that!?" He breathed in and out a few times, looking away with the barest hint of a blush on his face. "I mean, more than anybody else that is. Like, who isn't curious?"

"That is fair enough." Ranma relaxed himself back into his earlier position. "I still couldn't tell ya if I'm honest. Like, even with the girl body I got Pops and my fiancée treating me like a boy, sometimes it's like the only thing that's changed is my hair color."

"Fiancée?" Ryoga asked, turning his head towards Ranma.

"Akane, who, huh… just stomped off since her hair got cut." Ranma and Ryoga exchanged a guilty glance, staying silent for a few moments. "Didn't choose it. 'nother of Pops' schemes."

"Say, Ranma, are you still doing your breathing exercises?" Ryoga asked.

"Huh? My what now?" Ranma replied.

"You know, breathe in, breathe out…" Ryoga illustrated the action by waving his hand above his chest. "You used to do them a lot back in school when you were feeling down. You said it cleared your head."

Ranma snapped his fingers. That did ring a bell! "Oh wow, that's a blast from the past. I ain't done that in years!" He turned towards his friend. "Where did ya end up while ya were trackin' me down?"

Ryoga grumped. "...I don't want to talk about it."

"C'mon, we're friends, I ain't gonna judge ya." Ranma gave Ryoga his biggest grin, elbowing his friend's arm. "Did ya get yourself to France again?"

Ryoga shook his head. He lifted up his umbrella and looked at the damage on its handle. "Crap! I busted the opening mechanism!"

"I don't suppose ya have a spare in that gigantic bag a' yours?" Ranma asked.

"No…" Ryoga replied with a frown.

"Well, tough luck then, seems you're gonna have to do without." Ranma stretched and bounced onto his feet, standing up.

Ryoga didn't take off his eyes from his umbrella. "I can't."

"Hmm? Why not?" Ranma asked. "A lil' rain can't kill ya, can it?"

Ryoga glared at Ranma.

"Oh. Oh no. Don't tell me you went to Jusenkyo." Ranma said in a mortified, higher pitched voice. Ryoga's silence spoke for itself. "What spring did you fall into?"

"It wasn't that simple." Ryoga looked up at the sky and grimaced at the growing mass of clouds above.

Akane walked home and holed herself up in her room. Stupid Ranma and stupid Ryoga and stupid everything.

She wanted to cry, but she felt too numb to do so.

She had taken so long to grow her hair out, and yet it ended up right back where it was when she was seven. When the world was simpler and she was getting called a boy rather than a tomboy.

At some point, the way her classmates looked at her had changed. It was important that they knew, and that _ she _knew, that no matter how boy-like she acted, she was a girl. They weren't wrong per se, she was one, she did feel like a woman, but it was the way she had to adhere to femininity or get shunned that she loathed.

Maybe it was for the best that her hair got cut. She hated having to pretend to be feminine, and it got in the way when fighting.

She laid her head down on her desk and dozed off to the sound of a growling storm approaching.

She was woken up a half hour later by the sound of rain and a knock at her… window?

She pulled her head off of her desk and rubbed her eyes open. Oh. It was Ranma. Of course it was Ranma.

She opened the window and glared him down, while he awkwardly poked his fingers at one another. "Thought you'd be catching me in the middle of crying?" she asked.

"Well… kind of, I mean, I would be crying if I were in your situation…" a switched Ranma replied.

Akane sighed. "What are you doing here? Is the door downstairs closed?"

"Is it okay if I ask that you close your eyes for a minute?" Ranma asked with a tiny voice. "We just need to head to the bathroom."

He couldn't have said a more suspicious sentence had he tried. Akane crossed her arms, unimpressed.

"Aka - 'Kane," Ranma pleaded, switching back to his heavy accent, "s'bout a man's honor here!"

She felt her anger rise. Stupid Ranma caring about stupid pointless things again… No. She had to be better than this. She closed her eyes. "Urgh. Whatever. Go through my room, I'm going downstairs anyways." Akane stood up and stomped off, not wanting to care about what Ranma's machinations could possibly be.

Following the pleasant smell of cooking, she headed to the kitchen in search for Kasumi. She found her sister deeply focused on the stove, cooking vegetables in a pan while rice slowly cooked in a big pot next to it. "Big sis, where's Nabiki?"

"Hmm? I thought you wouldn't be back in time for dinner!" Kasumi replied. "She went to the library, I believe..." She turned her head for a second to smile at Akane, only to jump in surprise at her haircut, almost dropping the pan's contents to the floor.

"No need to overreact, sis, it's not like I never had short hair before," Akane said.

"What happened to your hair?" Kasumi asked, putting the pan back on the stove and turning down the heat to its minimum.

"Oh, I just wanted to change my style, nothing more," Akane replied, making up the lie on the spot rather convincingly. "I cut it myself, but I kind of made a mess. Do you think you could even it out for me?"

Ranma and Ryoga ran through the house, heading to the bathroom before anybody would spot them. Ranma ran in first and turned on the hot water, then jumped in without wasting a second, turning himself back into a guy.

"You put it on the highest temperature, right?" Ryoga asked from the other side of the thin door separating the laundry and bathing areas.

"I'm like a lobster boilin' alive in here!" Ranma replied, pulling his reddened arm out and looking at it with a grimace.

A shadow threw the door open and jumped into the bath immediately. Ryoga pulled himself back to the surface, touching his nose in relief. "Thanks, Ranma. I owe you one."

"How did you end up with it if you didn't fall into a spring 'nyways?" Ranma asked, already leaving the bath before the heat started to hurt him too much.

Ryoga boiled in barely restrained rage more than he did from the water that would've scalded anybody but him three times over. "I walked through all of China trying to find you. Day after day of having to ask for unhelpful directions, of trying to find where you could be in the massive mainland.

"One day I found myself at a strange place of numerous springs and bamboo poles. I didn't know back then that this place would spell the most awful day I have ever lived.

"It started with a painful injury as a strange girl running after a panda knocked me off a cliff and made me plummet to a hundred meters below. I was out cold for hours.

"When I finally came to, I could barely see where I was going due to the concussion. I just remember a shrieking voice with a heavy Chinese accent… They were talking to someone else about their next meal, I think…

"'Oh! Maybe we use water from drowned pig pond to cook in! That way, we have pork even if we catch only bug!'" Ryoga repeated, doing his best impression of the voice that haunted him.

"And in my attempts to find where to even head to… I ran straight into the pot, burning myself to a pulp, and receiving… and receiving…! My body was changed into something disgusting, a disfigurement in guise of curse…!" Ryoga slammed his fist on the side of the tub, leaving a thick crack snaking through its entire width. "And now…! If I get into contact with any water of any temperature…! People flee my monstrous, unsightly appearance…! And only water hot enough to burn skin off can even revert it! Do you understand now why you ruined my life!? Without the desire you created in me to see you again, I would've never gone to China, and I would've never gotten a body I wish to tear the skin off of me!"

Ranma frowned, placing his hands on his hips. "Oi, oi! If anything you should be blamin' that strange girl and her panda, not m— not…" His expression softened in realisation.

Oh no.

As if the gods had conspired to create a cosmic joke of the most perfect timing with Ranma as its fool, Genma in his panda form opened the sliding door to the bathing area, and stopped dead in his tracks as he spotted the two teens. He pulled out a wooden placard that read 'Apologies…' and closed back the door, patiently waiting his turn from the laundry area.

"P-p-panda…" Ryoga muttered, before turning his head towards Ranma and squinting.

Ranma took a step back as his friend pulled himself out of the tub, grabbed a plastic bucket he filled with cold water using the shower head on the wall, then threw its contents on Ranma.

"...Izit too late to try to play innocent?" Ranma asked in a falsetto, striking the most cutesy pose he could muster.

"I'M GOING TO KILL YOUUUU!" Ryoga roared, giving chase as Ranma ran out of the bathroom.

Akane didn't like the shout she had just heard. At least Kasumi had just finished touching up her hair. The big sister shared the same worried look as her on her face, and they headed out the living room to see what the commotion was about.

Ryoga chasing Ranma while both were in the nude was definitely not the sight she had expected.

She huffed and chased after them as well. "Put on some clothes, you idiots!" She went up the stairs and saw that they had headed into Ranma's bedroom. Following in, she was relieved to see they had at least each thrown on a shirt and boxers.

"RANMAAAAAA!" Ryoga headed in with a punch.

"Look, man, I'm sorry! I didn't even know I'd done that!" Ranma leaned backwards, blocking the hit with his leg.

"RANMAAAAAAAAA!" Ryoga repeated, throwing another punch. Ranma dodged by jumping to the other side of the room and Ryoga ran straight into the wall, crumbling it into shards.

The storm outside poured in, drenching Ryoga.

Akane saw a black little spiral tail pop out above his underwear.

When he turned around, he had a cute little pig snout in guise of a nose and floppy black ears under his bandana.

"RANMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" He screamed again, aiming another strike. Enough was enough. He had already destroyed one wall. Akane intervened and pinched Ryoga's snout while grabbing Ranma by the breast. Both fighters were rolling on the floor in pain in seconds.

"I'm… I'm home!" Nabiki yelled from the entrance, shaking off the water from her raincoat and heading into the living room… only to find her family convening around the dining table with an extra face in the crowd. A mildly piggish one at that.

Akane was seated between her fiancée and the pig boy, her huffing keeping them docile for now. She nodded to Nabiki as she sat down and grabbed herself a bowl of rice. "Nice hair, Akane."

"Thanks," she replied. If she was honest, she'd really thought earlier today that she would end up crying over it. She had considered going to Dr. Tofu's for a supportive shoulder to weep on, yet in the end, once she got her haircut from Kasumi, all the desire to do so disappeared. She must've disliked her long hair more than she'd thought.

Nabiki threw a glance across the table and Akane followed her gaze. Kasumi and the two dads were in their own discussion, their father and Genma praising her cooking. Ranma and Ryoga had their nose and snout turned down towards the food in shame.

Nabiki bounced her eyebrows twice at Akane and slid her a piece of paper. It read 'First hint is free of charge'. "Hey, Ranma, can you give me the salt?" she asked, prompting the teen to attention. "Ryoga, hand me the sauteed vegetables please. Oh, and, Ranko, I'd like the pepper as well!" Akane tilted her head in confusion.

"Sure," Ranma replied on her left, taking each shaker in one hand and handing them both, while Ryoga gave the vegetables plate wordlessly.

Nabiki beamed, picking a few vegetables with her chopsticks and adding them to her rice. "Thank you~! Gosh, the things you learn by just looking in the right book. You know, I've heard there's this 'internet' thing that's starting to happen over in the States, I wonder how it'll change libraries once it makes its way to Tokyo! Imagine being able to read a book that's on a computer on the other side of the world!"

Hmm. As cryptic as ever. Akane threw a glance to her fiancée; he had already dipped back into his food, munching wordlessly. She turned her head to Ryoga. "So are you spending the night here, then?"

"If you can tolerate a sight as unsightly as me, and forgive my wretched self for the property damage…" Ryoga muttered in reply.

"Tolerate? Ryoga, your little pig thing is _ cute _. Honestly, it suits you," Akane said.

Ryoga turned his head away a bit too late to hide his blush. "I get treated like a pigman freak wherever I walk, people fleeing me on sight."

...He was not aware of his own strength, was he? Of course anybody would flee someone that can take down an entire wall with a single punch.

"Well, one way or the other, you two are sleeping in the dojo, because we don't have any more spare bedrooms and yours in not in a usable state," Akane stated.

Ryoga and Ranma shared an uneasy glance.

(A teary eyed panda lifted a placard that said "What about me?", but as we all know, animals can sleep very comfortably outside.)


	8. Gymnastic Martial Arts - Part 1

"Aren't you a pretty thing, miss! Here, yours is on the house."

"Kyaaa~! Thank you sir!" an ecstatic Ranko replied, delicately taking her double scoop bubblegum-sprinkles and vanilla-cookie ice cream from the vendor's hand.

"And it'll be five hundred sixty yen for you, sir."

Ryoga grumbled, paying up for his own chocolate and mint cone.

These past three days had been a blast for Ranma. Following Ryoga's advice, he had started picking up his breathing exercises once again, and he had never felt as in tune with himself as now.

He wasn't sure quite how to describe it? It's like he had control over whether he wanted to have his fighting spirit around or not. He'd gotten to spend most of the past three days with no drive to train with his dad, nor bicker with Akane, nor playfully tease Ryoga… He got to do _normal_ things instead, like heading into town with his best buddy and eating ice cream together.

"I can't believe you get to do stuff like this and you still thought it was fair to call it a curse," Ryoga accused.

"That's true… If I was a boy right now, everybody would be judging me for eating something like this, hehe. But thankfully, I'm-a-girl-right-now~!" Ranma replied, emphasizing the last few words with a few happy hops, taking a gigantic lick from his icy treat.

"And you use that awesome power to get ice cream for free," Ryoga stated.

"I didn't choose not to pay, the kindly man just handed it to me," Ranma replied before thinking for a bit. "I'll have to go back and tell him thanks next time."

"You do know he was flirting with you, right?" Ryoga asked.

Ranma suddenly paused, a big lick of ice cream on his tongue. "Eh?"

Ryoga stared at Ranma for a second. "You... hadn't noticed? Why did you think he gave it to you for free?"

"I thought he was just a nice boy, I… I'm a boy! I'm not gay!" Ranma frowned, dejected. "If anything I'm closer to being a lesbian than anything."

"A lesbian trapped in a man's body…" Ryoga nodded, before adding in a mutter, "but only half the time compared to me…"

Ranma snickered. "I missed you, Ryoga. You get me. I missed having a friend that already knows me."

"Yeah, I'm guessing adapting to living with a bunch of strangers was a bit rough?" Ryoga asked, devouring his entire cone in one hungry bite.

"I mean, they're Dad's friends, and it's not like I dislike any of them…" In Ranma's opinion, Kasumi was very kindly and Akane was… Akane was Akane. That left only the middle sister. "Well, Nabiki scares me a little."

Ryoga nodded in agreement, a shudder passing through him from head to toes. "I didn't think someone could have this many questions about a curse like mine."

Walking ahead, Ranma noticed a crowd of leotard-wearing girls of about his age lined up in front of a small aerobics gym where a stand seemed to have been set up. Two girls were sparring with gymnastic clubs as a demonstration, when an errant blow caused one of the clubs to fly up in the sky and direct itself straight towards Ranma. He dodged with a frontflip and even managed to grab the club just before it would've hit the ground behind him.

The two girls were impressed. "Oh my gosh! Where did you learn to move like that!?" the first one asked.

"Giiirl, you'd make a killing at the tournament!" the second one continued.

Ryoga and Ranma approached and handed the girls their weapon back. "Tournament?" Ranma said.

"Yeah, giiirl! Martial arts rhythmic gymnastics tournament! Don't tell me you've never heard of it before?" She grabbed Ranma's hand and tugged him towards the stand, where a young girl waved at him and handed him a flyer.

If Akane hadn't had the advert right in front of her eyes, she probably wouldn't have believed the two boys' tall tale. It said it right there - open martial arts rhythmic gymnastic tournament for teams of three, with a cash prize for the winner. "How does gymnastic martial arts even work?" she asked incredulously.

"It's a very fine combat art that combines grace with power!" Ryoga announced, setting his foot on the table in a triumphant pose. "Only the most agile, most skilled combatants who know how to wield regular gymnastics apparatus as dangerous weapons can hope to triumph over their opponent! But it's also an art of the spectacle, one where pushing the enemy team out of the ring isn't enough - the audience needs to be entertained for the victory to truly count!"

"...So it's basically wrestling," Akane replied.

Ryoga flopped onto his face, his enthusiasm promptly dashed. "I mean if you want to make it sound boring…"

"I think it's cute that you have a passion, Ryoga," Ranma said with a simple smile.

Akane was relieved that it was still that version of Ranma hanging out. She was almost to the point of dreading when the switch would happen, but was still able to count her blessings for now. "Why do you know so much about it anyways?" Akane asked.

"My hometown is famous for its numerous festivals. Our local gymnastic martial arts team always performs. I tried to join it when I was a kid, but…" Ryoga's expression deflated. "…back then they only accepted girls."

Akane took a second look at the flier. "This one seems to be mixed genders at least." She turned her head towards Ranma. "Sounds perfect for you, doesn't it?"

"Hey, that's mean, Akane…" Ranma replied, pouting.

Akane buried her head in the flier. Gods, why did this Ranma have to be so… so… adorable!? She couldn't even tease him without him turning it back on her and making her feel guilty! At least if there was one thing the other Ranma had over this one, it's that he knew how to retort! …She refocused herself on the topic at hand. "So you want to participate?"

"I don't know… It's been so long, I'm probably rusty… and useless, and awful, and graceless, and…" Akane tuned Ryoga out as he lost himself in self-deprecation, and listened for Ranma's side of the reply.

"I guess it's less like a fight and more like sport? It sounds fun," Ranma replied with a nod.

Akane was lukewarm on the idea. On the one hand, it was martial arts. On the other, it was gymnastics, and she couldn't care less about that.

"My my, what have we here?" A voice came from behind Akane and the flier was snatched out of her hands. She turned around just in time to see Nabiki read over the advert and her pupils turn into yen symbols when she spotted the prize money for first place.

Ranma imagined the ebb and flow of a calm beach, his breaths synchronizing with the waves. He believed he would perform better with his will to fight around, and so focused himself on bringing it out. The waves roared into a tempest and he felt his flame light up again. Coincidentally, though, it seemed his feelings chose right this timing to make him woefully uninterested in a competition of grace. "Can ya believe we got suckered into this by Nabiki?"

"You seemed pretty enthusiastic about it yourself just a moment ago," Akane replied, balancing a gymnastic club in her hand to get used to its weight.

"I know! I know I was, okay? Ain't no rules forbiddin' me from changin' my mind!" he said, crossing his arms and huffing.

"...Bipolar disaster."

"Uncute tomboy."

They both stuck out their tongue at one another.

Akane went back to her club, training herself to throw it up in the air and catch it (to little success).

Ranma approached Ryoga, who seemed pensive. "Oi, Ryoga, ya doin' alright there?"

"Yes, I'm just… reminiscing," he replied, looking at the tools of the art. "I haven't had a chance to practice gymnastics martial arts in so long, I… I missed it." He grabbed a ribbon and started twirling it above his head. "Would you mind being my target for a second, Ranma?"

Ranma shrugged, a cocky smile on his face. "Sure? How much can it even hurt, 'nyways?"

"Prepare yourself, Ranma! Iron Cloth Ribbon!" Ryoga pointed the ribbon's twirl forwards and caught Ranma in the spiral. As it struck him over and over on his legs and arms, he discovered the answer was 'very'.

"That's amazing!" Akane exclaimed, observing the pig boy's talent.

"Aah…" The lost boy trailed off as he blushed a little. "I'm not _that_ good, it's just an easy technique once you get the hang of it…"

Ranma went to sit the next technique exhibition out, having learned not to underestimate gymnastics martial arts. "Ryoga really has self esteem issues," Akane whispered to Ranma.

Ryoga then proceeded to show off the few techniques they would be training themselves on for the following week, involving the clubs, ribbon, balls, circles and jump ropes typical of the less competitive version of the sport.

Akane was panting heavily, tangled in her own ribbon after a pitiful attempt at reproducing Ryoga's moves. Ranma wasn't having much success either; his style was much too energetic, preventing the grace-fueled techniques of gymnastics martial arts from activating to their fullest power.

The teens stopped there for the evening, then prepared themselves for bed.

Akane headed to school with Ranma in tow, who stifled a yawn. A girl in a different school's uniform was waiting at the gate. With her dark hair and perfect makeup, she exuded an air of vain elegance. Akane had the feeling she had seen her somewhere before, but couldn't quite place it.

As she expected to simply walk past her, the woman's eyes narrowed as she spotted the two of them, and she began speaking. "Are you the sister of Tendo Nabiki?"

"Hmm?" Any friend of Nabiki was someone to be wary of, Akane thought. "If you're looking for her, I think she headed to school before us."

"Ah! Well, I must have missed her. No matter, my brother should bring her here soon, then." The girl whipped her ponytail from one shoulder to the other. Her eyes narrowed once more as she looked away from Akane and Ranma. "...Isn't this young man heading towards you?"

Ranma turned around, confused. "Wha? Ryoga! What are ya doin' here!?"

"Ranma?" the pig boy replied, approaching. "Say, where's the kitchen? I wanted to put a teapot on the stove just in case."

"...Did ya just get lost tryin' to find _the kitchen_ back at the Tendo's?" Ranma pinched the bridge of his nose, looking down in frustration.

"I thought that's where you were heading, I just followed you!" Ryoga argued.

"Why would I be goin' to the kitchen!?" Ranma shouted back.

"I don't know! I… I zoned out," Ryoga admitted, glancing away.

Ranma let out a sigh, calming down. "Okay. I'm bringin' you back home 'n' then I'm headin' straight back to school." Ranma grabbed Ryoga's hand and ran off towards the Tendo household. "Don't wait for me, Akane!" he said, turning his head back towards the school one last time.

"I wasn't planning to, idiot!" Akane replied, loud enough to make sure he'd heard her. "I swear, these two make a pair…"

"A-are these the two boys that were seen hugging in the middle of a spar?" The other girl, who had observed the scene in silence, finally spoke up. "And, if what my brother told me about this Ranma man, and his failed partnership with… Oh… Oh my…!" She blushed, bringing her hands to her face.

What kind of misunderstanding had she just invented for herself?

"Well… Once your friends are back, please… Could you tell them…" Her voice rose to a booming tone, grabbing the attention of all the students in the courtyard. "That they have the Black Rose of Furinkan's -that is, my- greatest and utmost respect for their incredible boy-meets-boy romantic passion!? That they have my blessing for the blooming of their garden of love!"

Akane's eyes went wide as she connected the dots. "W-wait, are you-"

The woman exploded into a high pitched, rhythmic laugh. "I am the leader of the gymnastics martial arts club of St. Hebereke's High School for Girls! The rising star of grace, I am… KODACHI KUNO!" She pulled off her school uniform in one swipe, revealing her gymnastic leotard underneath, as well as a gust of black petals. "Remember my name, sister of Tendo Nabiki!"

Of course she had to be Tatewaki's sister. Akane threw her head into her palm, mortified. Looks like the school was going to be convinced Ranma was gay after all. …Well, it was fair payback for the time he had claimed he understood her pain of being incorrectly labelled a lesbian.

Satisfied with her flashy introduction, Kodachi settled down, then took another glance at her conversation partner. "Wait… If you are Nabiki's sister, might you be Tendo Akane, by any chance?"

"Yes…?" Akane said, apprehending where this was going.

Kodachi dropped her hand onto Akane's shoulder recomfortingly. "I would like to apologize for my brother's zealousness in labelling you a woman of sapphic pursuits. He can be thickheaded, and prone to misunderstandings," she said with the most serious of tones.

Akane flopped onto her face, index and pinky fingers extended out. Wasn't the pot calling the kettle black?

"Now, Akane-san, I'm afraid I don't have much time left before I need to head for my own school, so I will be off to looking for your sister before it is too late. Stay strong, and don't let the rumors drive your mood down." Kodachi threw her a smile, before heading into the school building at a swift pace.

Were both Kuno siblings seriously like this!?

She stomped towards the school, heading for her classes before she would have to hear the whispered rumors roar in intensity.

The morning classes went by much too slowly for Ranma's taste, not least because of the weird glances he kept getting all morning. But at least Akane finally accepted his offer to spend lunch time with him - he had been worried from seeing her sit alone for the better part of the past week.

Their meal was quickly interrupted as the door to the classroom slammed open. "Tendo Akane!" the local kendo trainee Tatewaki exclaimed, approaching them both. "Am I correct in my understanding that you have met my sister this morning?"

"Wait, what? Was that who that girl was?" Ranma asked.

"Yes, Tatewaki, we met your sister this morning," Akane replied in a droning voice. Ranma grimaced, realizing that Tatewaki was the origin of the rumors putting her in a foul mood.

"Aaah! Curses!" Tatewaki raised his face towards the ceiling, planting his hand over it. "Did she insinuate that Saotome Ranma and his childhood friend are lovers, I fear!?"

"SHE DID WHAT!?" Ranma screamed, jumping out of his seat. He turned his head towards Akane for a visual confirmation she refused to give him.

"So you've heard the rumors?" Akane replied, pointedly avoiding giving Ranma any attention.

"AND THERE'S RUMORS TOO!?" That's it. Ranma's life was ruined. If they didn't have to head out of Furinkan before, they had to now. Maybe he could convince his pops if he promised he'd do the cooking for the next year on the road.

Tatewaki slid down onto his knees and prostrated himself in shame. "On behalf of my honor as a kendo master, I would like to apologize for my sister's proneness in calling you, Saotome Ranma, a pursuer of masculine lovers. She can be thickheaded, and prone to misunderstandings."

"Where could I possibly have heard that one before," Akane replied, gritting her teeth.

"Still, that is not the only reason I have come to talk to you at this time," Tatewaki continued, lifting his head up. "I have heard from your sister Nabiki that you have entered a competition in gymnastic martial arts?"

"Can we please go back to the whole 'people think I'm gay' stuff!? Cuz it ain't true! I'm not!" Ranma pleaded to deaf ears. "Akane, tell 'em!"

Akane shook her head and ignored him. "We did. Why?"

"Wonderful!" Tatewaki stood himself back onto his feet. "I look forward to crossing your path on the battlefield, then. My sister and I have registered ourselves as our own team. Know that we do not intend to lose! Farewell, Akane, precious partner of Ranko!" He ran off on that note, leaving the pair of teens behind, stunned.

"Akane!" Ranma growled, throwing daggers at his fiancée. "Why didn't ya tell everybody I ain't into men!?"

Akane shrugged nonchalantly, a mean smile on her face that would've befitted her sister more. "I just thought you'd appreciate the perspective."

"Ya… YA UNCUTE TOMBOY!" Ranma shouted, causing his fiancée's eye to twitch.

"BIPOLAR DISASTER!" Akane replied.

The two teens huffed and went back to their meals, sitting as far away from one another as they could.


	9. Gymnastic Martial Arts - Part 2

Akane flopped down onto her butt, utterly exhausted, and grabbed a water bottle from the pack they had brought in the corner. The competition was in two days. Her own progress was relatively steady - she couldn't say the same of Ranma, who still didn't understand the difference between a ribbon and a whip, and in consequence received most of Ryoga's assistance.

Ryoga effortlessly caught another of Ranma's strikes with his hand. "You need to put more grace into it, Ranma," he said. "The ribbon needs to come at me curved, not straight ahead. You shouldn't be flicking your wrist, but accompanying the ribbon with it."

"Aye, I know, I know! You've kept on repeatin' that for the better part of an hour!" Ranma replied loudly. "It ain't my fault if I'm trained for actual combat, not this pansy farce! Try rewritin' _your_ body's reflexes for a spin!"

It was blatantly obvious Ranma was frustrated and tired, and Akane had no clue why he kept forcing himself like this. It was like he was trying to ram down a wall using nothing but his own head. Was that how his dad had taught him all these years? Maybe that worked for more brutish things, but it was utterly ineffective here. Still, if the problem was that he was too used to his body working a specific way… She stood up, snuck up on him and emptied the bottle over his head.

"Gaaah!" Ranma shook his head, sending drops of water flying everywhere. Ryoga quickly protected his face with his shirt. "Seriously, Akane!? What was that for!?" he growled, shooting daggers at her with his eyes.

"How about you try again, now?" Akane asked.

His gaze softened, raising an eyebrow. He looked at the ribbon in his hand, tentatively turning his wrist in circles. He turned back towards Ryoga and attacked. The fabric curved and wrapped itself onto Ryoga's wrist, immobilizing his arm.

"Huh!? What's happening!?" the bandana boy asked, surprised. He certainly seemed to space out without fail every time Ranma switched to his girl body, Akane had noticed.

"I… I did it!" Ranma exclaimed, smiling widely.

Ryoga looked at his wrist and brought it up to his eye level. He barely had to shake it a bit for the ribbon to come loose, and it fell on the ground. "That was better than your previous attempts, but that's still not what I'd call a success."

While Ranma launched into a string of expletives, stomping around, Akane brought her hand to her chin in thought. At least this confirmed Ranma's girl body worked different. Maybe its reflexes were separate from his guy form, or maybe it was Ranma's own prejudices at play? Nevertheless, they only had two days left, and the last thing Akane wanted was to have Ranma waste them in frustration. Maybe it was time to ask for help from 'Ranko'?

Akane felt closer to putting the pieces together. After the way Nabiki had addressed both Ranma and 'Ranko', and all the odd reactions (or rather lack thereof) soft-Ranma had to that second name, she had come to give Ranko as a nickname to that version of Ranma, for the time being. She couldn't just keep thinking of them as jerk-Ranma and soft-Ranma anyways, so Ranma and Ranko it was.

Ranma felt Akane put her hand on his shoulder. In truth… he was so angry he felt on the verge of crying, and that angered him even further. He hoped she didn't notice. "What now?" he snapped.

"Could you do a few of your breathing exercises, please? You seem at your limit. Maybe it could help you calm yourself down?" she asked, tilting her head slightly with a concerned smile.

"Yeah, I'm gonna agree with your girlfriend here," Ryoga said from the other side of the room.

"She ain't my girlfriend! We're forced fiancés! Fi-an-cés! We ain't had a say in it!" Ranma stomped his foot on the ground, shaking the tatamis. "Urgh, whatever, sure. I need a break 'nyways." He sat against the wall and crossed his legs, trying to breathe his anger out. Closing his eyes, he focused his senses on his own breathing. He counted to four, breathed in, counted to two, breathed out. He let himself fall into a rhythm. The pace slowed down as his thoughts mellowed out; the more anger left him, the more his perception of time stretched. When he opened his eyes again, everything went back to its usual speed - and he felt much calmer than before.

"Feeling better now, Ranma?" Akane asked.

"I think I do. Thank you, Akane." Ranma stood back up on his own two feet with a wobble and stretched his arms. "Maybe I should take a break for the evening, I feel exhausted."

"B-But the competition-" Ryoga exclaimed, getting interrupted.

"If Ranma says he needs a break then he needs a break, and you can train me in the meantime," Akane said with a wave of the hand. "You've spent the past five days on him, I want your advice too!"

Ryoga nodded in silence, defeated.

Akane gave Ranma a smile that said she had his back, which he returned before opening the dojo's door and leaving.

"So what should I be focusing on? The ribbon, the clubs, the hoops?" She raised her balled up fists to her chest with a wide smile. Ryoga was so good at this, she couldn't wait for his advice!

"Well, you… uh… there's…" Ryoga struggled to look her in the eyes, and he trailed off every time he tried to reply.

An awkward silence set into place.

Akane blanked, tilting her head. "Are you okay?"

"I'm - I'm fine," Ryoga muttered, sitting down and clutching his legs. "It's just that without Ranma, I..."

She approached him slowly, worry growing in her mind. Maybe Ryoga and Ranma were cut from the same cloth, and the pig boy buried his feelings just like her fiancé did. She couldn't help but feel like she had to help somehow. "Hey, everything's alright, you can talk to me. What's the issue, Ryoga?"

Ryoga finally let up and looked at her. Tears snaked down his cheeks and he jumped towards Akane, hugging her tight enough to knock the wind out of her. "I missed getting to be with him…! I don't want to lose him again…!"

Akane jerked, startled, before tentatively returning the hug. She didn't really know how to feel about a relative stranger clinging onto her like this, but Ryoga seemed as if he really needed this. She guessed he was more of a hugger than she'd thought, if it extended beyond giving them only to Ranma.

"My life before meeting him, before… Before my best buddy… I don't remember any time I was happy, I don't remember most of anything, and then he came along and I-" He sniffled. "I actually started living, and, and now he's back in my life and I don't want to lose him again…! But I know it's only a matter of time before I scare him away by being a wretched friend, foul and demanding and horrible-"

Akane swept him off his feet, lifting under his knees and his shoulder blades. The act cut his rant short immediately. "Well, at least I don't think you're any of that."

"But… But my body, and my curse…!"

"I already told you, didn't I?" she huffed, raising her head. "The pig thing is cute on you."

"Maybe you think so, but… When I look in the mirror, all I can see is this unsightly snout, these mismatching ears… Even when they're not there, it's all I can see, it all feels… wrong." He tried to wiggle out of her grasp, only to find her holding on tighter. "At least Ranma got a cute curse, and… And it's his fault I got mine!"

"But you don't hate him, do you?" Akane asked. She still didn't know what the whole 'Die, Ranma' business had been about if they were the best of friends.

"Of course I do! The bastard left me behind!" Ryoga clenched his fist in front of his head, grinding his teeth. "We were supposed to stay together forever, and he disappeared without telling me! And now because of him, I am forever defaced!" Akane tried to get a word in, only to have him ramble on. "But he didn't choose to leave! His dad did! And he's my best friend, and… And he doesn't know how lucky he has it… A power like this, and a girlfriend like you, and getting to live with the people he cares about… Who knows how many days until I get myself lost and don't find my way back here?"

Akane did her best to process the tangled emotions Ryoga had just expressed. "Hey, Ryoga… If you ever find yourself bottling emotions, come talk to me. I want to help you."

Ryoga stayed silent for a bit, his mouth slightly agape. "...You mean it?"

"Of course! I want to be your friend." She dropped him back onto his feet, before giving him a hug. "I don't know if I'll ever understand you the way Ranma does, but I can try."

"...Thanks," Ryoga said.

Akane let go and smiled. "No problem, P-chan."

"P-chan?" he asked.

"I thought it would be a cute nickname? The P is for pig. You're like my little protégé that way!" Akane added, clapping her hands once.

Ryoga chuckled, looking away. "I'm not sure I qualify as little… Built like I am…"

This last sentence made Akane's instincts tingle. Was that a twinge of melancholy she'd heard in his tone? She mentally filed it somewhere in her brain, then picked up a discarded club. "So about those gymnastic martial arts techniques?"

"Right!" Ryoga said with renewed vigor, picking up a club of his own.

Ranma skipped about in the Tendo's house, stifling a yawn. Maybe he should switch back to male before taking a nap, but he just didn't feel like doing that for some reason. Well, as long as nobody saw him do it, right? One way or the other, he needed some food in his belly first.

Heading to the kitchen, he spotted Kasumi and Nabiki discussing in the living room. Nabiki waved at him as he arrived. She squinted a bit, apparently trying to read something onto him.

"Um… Hi," Ranma said, feeling scrutinized.

"Oh, it's Ranko!" Nabiki snickered. "How are you doing tonight?"

"Ranko-chan!" Kasumi added with a smile.

Well, now Ranko felt put on the spot, like she had to join in on the conversation. "I'm doing okay… Training is hard."

"Come on, a smart girl like you, you'll figure it out, won't you?" Nabiki gave her a dark smile. "Plus, that wall won't pay itself, remember?"

"Nabiki-chan, that's enough," Kasumi sternly stated. "Is there anything we can do to help you relax, Ranko-chan?"

The memory of her last interaction with the two sisters came to her mind, when they had forced her into Akane's clothes. She kind of wanted to try to pick an outfit herself this time. ...Wait. No? She was a… boy, right? A man amongst men, he was Ranma...

Nabiki bumped Kasumi's shoulder and muttered to her. "She's slipping out."

Wait, that was part of what her little sister had prepped her on, right? Kasumi didn't fully understand yet, but Nabiki had explained that that meant Ranko required a bit of affirmation. "Ranko-chan, it's okay! You don't need to be anybody but Ranko with us."

"...Dad won't find out any of this, will he?" Ranko asked, worry apparent in her voice.

"Not a single word," Kasumi replied. Nabiki mimed zipping her lips closed.

This time, the closet getting rummaged was Kasumi's, and a few safety pins had been prepared for on-the-spot adjustments to Ranko's small stature.

Ranko couldn't believe she was doing this of her own free will. Protests came strongly from the back of her mind, but she paid them no attention, drowning them out by humming a song she had heard on the radio recently. "I'm a lonely girl~..." she half-muttered the lyrics while looking at Kasumi's variety of dresses. Not a single pair of pants in sight, she noticed. "Hey, Nabiki, is it alright if I drop out of the competition?" If she had to be honest, her interest in it had waned a bit after she had realized the ratio of martial arts to gymnastics was skewed in the other direction than the one she had thought.

"I don't think your friend Ryoga would appreciate that. He seems pretty invested in it. I mean, you can still do that if you want, I have a contingency plan." Nabiki fell back on her big sister's bed, looking at the ceiling. "I always have contingency plans."

"Are you not enjoying it, Ranko-chan?" Kasumi asked, her hands gently placed on her lap.

Ranko pulled out what she thought was a white dress, only to find an apron that must've been misplaced from the kitchen to Kasumi's laundry, from how often she was the one wearing it. "I'm not good at it…"

"Ranma isn't good at it at all, yeah. But we're talking Ranko here! I've heard all about Ranma's frustration, but I've yet to pass by the dojo and hear Ranko training." Nabiki poked around on her sister's bed and grabbed a book with a bookmark in it. Just as she was about to open it, Kasumi snatched it out of her hands, her cheeks red.

"I don't think I follow..." Ranko's eyes drifted down to a cardboard box at the bottom of Kasumi's dresser. The lady in question being too busy keeping the book an arm's length away from her sister, she didn't notice as Ranko opened it, finding soft plastic mounds of different sizes meant to… imitate breasts? She blushed and shoved it back in before closing the box and promptly forgetting she ever saw that.

Nabiki lost interest in the book and sat cross-legged, crossing her arms as well. "Fifty thousand yen and I'll stop beating around the bush."

"I don't have that kind of money!" Ranko pouted.

Nabiki let out her signature, evil grin. "And now you have a motivation for the competition, don't you? That'd cover about half of that, wouldn't it?"

Ranko turned to Nabiki, still pouting.

Nabiki's smile instantly shattered. She jumped backwards, hitting her back against the wall. "Aah! Alright, alright, if you win I'll tell you!"

"Yaaay!" Ranko smiled earnestly before digging back into Kasumi's closet.

"...That girl's pout is a weapon of mass persuasion," Nabiki muttered.

Kasumi nodded a bit incredulously.

"Oh! Oh oh oh!" Ranko pulled out a dusty Furinkan school uniform from the back of the closet.

"My goodness, I didn't know that was still in there!" Kasumi exclaimed, bringing her hand to her lips. "It probably won't even need to be touched up, I was much closer to your height back in high school."

Ranko hugged the fabric tight against her chest. It did have the faintest smell of Kasumi on it. She was okay with that; Kasumi was nice.

"Well, are you gonna wear it or what?" Nabiki asked.

Ranko pulled off her clothes and quickly slid the dress over her boxers. She felt incredibly giddy, like her heart threatened to beat out of her chest. She approached Kasumi's vanity to look at herself in the mirror. She looked just like any of her schoolmates! She twirled around, the dress spinning up to her knees before settling back down.

Kasumi and Nabiki exchanged a smile.

"You look very cute, Ranko-chan," Kasumi affirmed.

"Yep! Maybe you should show off to Akane like this." Nabiki smirked.

Ranko's smile faltered a bit.

"Oh, and if you're gonna compete as a girl, you'll need to wear panties under your leotard, right?" Nabiki continued. "You should probably buy your own pack, though. It's my treat if you do."

The music in her head stopped. The voice she had kept from creeping up suddenly jumped at her and shouted in anger. This wasn't right! He was Ranma, he was a man, the most man, the man amongst men! A tremor caught over and he buckled on his knees, holding his shoulders tightly. "Get me out. Get me out of this now. I can't - remove this."

Kasumi jumped out of her seat and to the rescue, carefully lifting the uniform off of his arms. "I'm so sorry, Ranko-chan!"

"It's… It's fine," he said. "Dad cannot see me like this. Nobody can. This is staying a secret."

Nabiki had a frown on her face. "Sure, uh..." She squinted. "Ran...ma? Ranko? Wait, which is it right now?"

"My name is Ran- …My name is Ran- Ran…" Their head jerked forward with each attempt at finishing their name. They were Ranma, they knew that. That was the name their dad gave them, so it was the one they had to go by. But it was like something was holding them back not from calling themselves Ranma, but from confirming no Ranko existed. "Ran, Ran, Ran, Ran…!" They wobbled back onto their feet and grabbed the uniform out of Kasumi's hands. "Ours."

"Sure, you can have it…" Kasumi said, wearing her emotions on her sleeve as she appeared totally stunned.

They left without saying one word more, clutching the clothes tight.

"Well, that was strange…" Kasumi stated, dropping back into her chair.

"I… genuinely do not know which of the two that was just now. It didn't sound like a third one of them, though," Nabiki said, scratching her head. "Heh. These two are already enough, imagine the chaos if there was a third one?"

"You mean… a third personality?" Kasumi asked. "That's what you'd called them, right? Personalities?"

"That's the gist of it, yeah, even if it isn't perfectly accurate. I think I'll need to go back to the library and check out that book again…" Nabiki lifted herself out of her sister's bed. "Say, you're not too mad about the uniform I hope?"

"Why would I be? I was never going to wear it again. But maybe Ranko-chan will!" Kasumi smiled.

Nabiki shook her head. "Not any time soon, at least."

"What kind of trauma did her father give her I wonder…" Kasumi pondered. "Speaking of, I haven't seen Saotome-san all day?"

"As I said, contingency plan." Nabiki replied, placing her hands on her hips.

Akane finally left the dojo, drooping her arms in front of her like they were jello. Ryoga sighed at the welcome solitude.

Well, this was not going swimmingly. His buddy Ranma was still stuck in a rut as far as he was aware, and Akane, while full of proper spirit, had to fight against her instincts at every turn to approximate grace.

Even with his (miserable, overblown, pitiful) talent, they would never win the tournament at this rate.

He opened his bag and pulled out his alarm clock to look at the time. It wasn't _that_ late in the evening, barely ten-thirty… Surely he could wait for Ranma to fall asleep and push himself to practice until four, right?


	10. Gymnastic Martial Arts - Part 3

Ranko swam happily, her mermaid tail propelling her forward through the turquoise water and a decor of coral and colorful tropical fish. She and her human doppelganger Ranma were approaching an oceanic ridge. She looked back at him, it was clear how much he struggled in this female body of his. He flailed his arms like he was swimming in jello, like his every movement came half as naturally to him as they did to her. And, of course, this sadness in his eyes. The one he would never admit to having, that she could see in there clear as day.

She slowed down with a twirl, letting him catch up. "Why do you insist so much on staying human?" she asked.

"Ya don't get it, Ranko. Unlike ya, I'm real, so I gotta stay real, ya know?" He gave her a resigned smile, empty of any emotion.

The more they approached the ridge, the warmer the water got. Bubbles of oxygen were starting to make their way out of the rocky ground around them.

"Like, I gotta be human for pops, right? That's what he wants me to be... and it's kinda what I am 'nyways. Can't fake what I was born as," he continued.

"Well, who says you have to live for dad? I wanted the tail, so I gave myself the tail. Plus, this is the land of dreams here, we can be whatever we want and nobody will be the wiser!" She offered him a smile, trying to convince him.

Ranma scratched the back of his neck. When he didn't focus on how to move himself forward, he managed it much better, Ranko noticed. "...Guess you're right, but… I'm scared if I try, I ain't wanna go back. And I'll have to, ya know. At some point or another."

As he passed over the ridge, the water was warm enough to trigger his transformation back. His hair turned black, his chest flattened, his manhood was regained, and the sadness in his eyes grew thricefold. Ranko followed suit, traversing over the landmark as quickly as she could.

Ranma eyed her with confusion, before pointing his index in her direction. "Why didn't ya turn back?"

Ranko smiled. "I'm always a woman in my mind."

"But the curse…?" he asked.

"Why would the curse have to work in our dreams?" she replied with another question.

The response gave him pause. "But in that case ya should be a man!"

She shook her head, passing him by. "Well, I chose otherwise."

He stood still for a second, before swimming after her. "I wish I had that liberty…"

The ocean quaked with a heavy growl as Ranko felt the wind get knocked out of her.

Ranko - Ranma immediately opened his eyes at the sudden awakening. Odd, why had that dream been from the perspective of the mermaid instead of him, this time? Well, it felt like it made sense, somehow, but it shouldn't, right?

Trying to stand up, he found the cause of the grumble as well as his breathing difficulties. Ryoga was collapsed on top of him, snoring, with gymnastic clubs still in his hands. Had he stayed up all night working on his moves? The tournament was today…

Oh… Well, Ranma pulled himself out from underneath his friend, then wrapped an arm around him as he shifted his blanket to cover them both. They could take a few more minutes of shut-eye.

Akane's eyes drifted open, awakened by the chirps of morning birds. She felt quite refreshed after a week of exercising different from her usual routine, almost to the point that she could head back to school and shrug off most of the jeers about her sexuality she knew to expect. Well, not that there had been any yet, but they would come, eventually, she was sure of that. The moment she would lower her guard.

Most importantly, today was the day of the competition, and the last thing she wanted was the two idiot boys to ruin their chances at winning by sleeping in late and turning their group into a no-show.

After putting on some slippers, she headed down to the dojo, opened the door, then looked in the corner where their sleeping mats had been set up.

Something about seeing them huddled together under the same blanket annoyed her a bit. Then she imagined if Ranma had been in his girl form and it made her blood boil.

Ranma suffered a second rude awakening as a bucket of cold water was dumped on him, triggering the usual prickling feeling of the curse activating. The water wasn't just cold in fact, it was glacial! He shivered as he snapped up, rubbing his hands on his arms. Ranma looked up and met Akane's cold glance. "'Kane! What was that for, ya ill-tempered tomboy!?" he growled. When he looked back down and noticed Ryoga, now adorned with his cute flat snout, clung around his torso, he yelped and pushed him away, shaking the pig boy out of his sleeping trance for a moment.

"Mhw…! Mh-what's happenin'…" Ryoga muttered, his snout sniffing ildly. "Izzit morning already…?"

Akane planted her face in her hand, rubbing the bridge of her nose.

After a quick breakfast and a teapot for Ryoga, the trio headed for the gym, Akane forcing them into a jog hoping to stir the pig boy to attention, to no avail. She hoped for anything to happen and snap him awake; he was their best chance at winning the tournament.

As she arrived in front of the building, her nose was assaulted by the smell of a much too flowery perfume, and she instantly regretted her wish.

"OH HO HO HO HO HO!" laughed Kodachi as she swung the door open. "My oh my, Tendo Akane! You seem to be in quite the foul mood! Are you sure you are at the best of your abilities for this competition?"

"Can it, Kuno!" Akane snapped back.

"And who might you be teaming with?" Kodachi smirked, approaching a Ranma making himself as small as he could behind Akane's back. The Kuno sister's smile faded as her expression got serious. "Oh. You've come with your _friend_," she continued, heavily emphasizing the word. "Don't worry, if anybody gives you... _unsavory _trouble for it, least of all my brother, I will put them back in their place! It's a promise!" She placed her hand on Akane's shoulder, who batted it away swiftly.

"Look, we really need to get into uniform-" Akane attempted to explain, only to be cut off by a girlish wail as Kodachi's gaze erred onto Ryoga.

"EEEEEEEE! My my my my my my!" The gymnast bounced straight towards Ryoga and stopped herself inches away from his face, an enormous grin on her own. "Why didn't you tell me you had the precious romantic baby boy on your team!?"

The sudden shrieking into his face finally managed to make a dent in Ryoga's drowsiness. "H-hey, I don't like being called that…"

"Say, is your boyfriend with you!? I assume you couldn't dream of spending more time than necessary away from your fated love!" Kodachi joyfully exclaimed.

Akane pressed her palm against her face.

"B-b-b-boyfriend!?" Ryoga stuttered out as if three cups of coffee had hit him at once, his face looking pale.

Ranko, as Akane recognized was Ranma's current mode, raised his hand meekly. "Erm… Kodachi, if I could clear up the misunderstanding here, I'm straight…"

Akane landed the ever elusive double facepalm combo.

Kodachi blinked a few times, staring at Ranko. "I know that, dear, that's why I'm doing my best to clear up you're not romantically involved with your dear friend Akane."

"...Did you forget you were in your girl form, Ranma…?" Akane muttered to her fiancé with what little patience she had left.

"Uh?" Ranko glanced down at himself. "Ah! Oh, I'm such a clutz. It just felt so natural I didn't think to check…"

"Anyway, I hope I will get to see your brother in the spectating crowd. He must be informed of the blessing I have offered his amorous adventure!" Kodachi waved at the group as she headed back inside. "See you in the finals!"

"Every time I talk to one of the Kunos I can feel one of my hairs turn gray," Akane grumbled under her breath.

With Ryoga now back at full energy, the three of them hurried to a changing room. Ranma came in behind Akane after she opened the door, spotting Nabiki already waiting for them inside, sitting on a bench set in front of a rack of lockers.

"There you three are." Nabiki waved, before picking up a package at her feet and throwing it towards Ranma. "Hey, Ranko, catch!"

"Hmm?" Ranko caught it in midair and looked at the bundle of cloth in cheap store plastic packaging. "What is this?"

"Panties and a bra," Nabiki replied with a smirk. Ranko's face reddened instantly. "Told you it'd be my treat, right? Wouldn't want you to go commando in leotard. That'd be extremely uncomfortable."

Ranko hid her face behind her bangs. Her brain having fried, she relied on her instincts instead: never turn down a gift, and be polite. "T-thank you…"

"Yeah, yeah. Win that competition for me now, alright?" She patted her sis and Ranko on their shoulders as she passed them by, then pulled on Ryoga's hand, bringing him outside. "Give the girls some privacy, big boy."

"Why's everyone insisting so much on that word today…" Ryoga grumped, following her with a defeated expression on his face. Ranko just had the time to see Nabiki's eyebrows shoot up in amused surprise before the door closed.

She turned her head back towards Akane, her knees shivering. She held the package against her chest, not sure what to do with it.

Akane sat on the bench, lifted her shirt off of herself and threw a glance at Ranko. "Open it and get dressed. We don't have much time."

"I mean, are you okay with, uh… changing next to me…?" Ranko averted her eyes from Akane's chest. It was to respect her privacy, yes. She definitely didn't feel self-conscious.

Akane muttered something Ranko didn't fully catch, about it being fine as long as she didn't 'switch'? Whatever she meant by that. Ranko sat down at the opposite end of the bench and threw her clothes off as quickly as she could, before opening the plastic wrap, looking at the plain underwear with much too tangled feelings, and slipping them on.

After putting on the leotard and confirming Akane had done the same, she reached for Akane's hand and gripped it firmly, before heading out to let Ryoga have his turn to change.

Akane finally breathed a sigh of relief after they had confirmed their presence at the roll call. They had ten minutes before their first match and she very much intended to spend them calming her beating heart.

"Hmm?" she heard Ranma mutter as he looked ahead at the crowd in the main gymnasium. She tried to follow his gaze and immediately took a discountenanced step back as she spotted the Saotome dad running straight towards them.

"Mr. Saotome?" Ryoga asked, confirming he saw Genma arriving too.

"There you children are!" Genma said as he stopped right in front of his son, placed his hands on his knees to regain his breath, then grabbed Ranma by the shoulders. "Ranma!"

"Uh…" the boy replied. "That is me, yes…"

"Be prepared for anything, boy! You will be facing strong opponents today!" Ranma's dad said with a serious smile. "Consider this valuable training! We'll make a man amongst men of you yet, won't we, boy!?"

"Yeah… Yeah! Aye!" Ranma smiled further the more he got into his dad's speech. Wait, no, if Ranko was no longer in control, then Ranma would be absolutely awful at martial arts gymnastics! Akane had to stop it!

"Thank you mister Saotome, but we really need to get going-" Akane tried to pull Ranma away by the shoulders but he batted her hands away.

"SAOTOME WAR CRY, GO!" the parent and child shouted in sync with fire in their eyes. "Break our bones and we break loose! The Saotomes never lose!"

"Atta, boy!" Genma offered a thumb up. "I'm counting on you to give us an amazing performance!"

"I will, pops!" Ranma replied with his signature cocky smile. Oh, did Akane hate that smile. It was always a warning sign of troubles ahead.

Genma's abdomen suddenly grumbled. He clutched at it in pain. "Urgh… I think I drank too many promotional sports drinks!"

As Genma ran back into the crowd, Akane resigned herself to knowing they would have to rely entirely on Ryoga if they wanted to reach the finals. "What does that even mean? Isn't this warcry saying if you find yourself in a losing position, you would flee?"

Ranma snapped his head towards her, looking genuinely hurt. "C'mon, 'Kane, don't analyze it! It's just cool!"

"Good grief…" As stupid as he acted, she hated even more the fact him being in his girl form during all of this made his stupidity look endearing instead.

A young woman, well dressed in a referee outfit, climbed into the ring. "Ladies and gentlemen, the Rythmic Gymnastic Martial Arts tournament is about to begin! Please find a free seat in the bleachers quickly!" The last few spectators hurried to do so, while the contestants waited near the sparring field.

Ranma grumbled as he spotted Tatewaki waving at them. The kendo master, wearing a sparkling jumpsuit more appropriate for Elvis Presley than a teenager with dreams of grandeur, pointed at Akane before giving Ranma a thumbs up. Ranma grimaced.

One of the ladies at the judge panel continued after her colleague. "Martial-arts fans from all around Nerima: thank you for waiting. The contest will be starting with teams F and H!"

"Will the contestants please enter the ring?" the referee finished.

Since they had registered last, that meant Akane, Ranma and Ryoga were team H. The three of them stood up and jumped onto the stage before waving at the crowd. Facing them was an all women team in brown leotards, with the kanjis for Matsuburi Buta in cream white on the front.

"Oi, Ryoga, ain't that your hometown's team?" Ranma asked.

"Oh my," one of the three piped up, "What are you doing here, bandana kid? Didn't we tell you gymnastics is a women's sport?"

"And… begin!" the referee announced.

Thirty seconds later, Ryoga stood on the other side of the ring, his ribbon still twirling above his head, as his unconscious opponents fell back down to the ground one by one. The bell rang.

"Gymnastics is for everyone!" he shouted, turning to the crowd. "A boy can like cooking, and sewing, and all these 'girly' things! I would know, I tried all of these, yet I haven't exactly stopped being a boy!"

...He might not be able to recognize his own abilities, but reaching the finals would be easier than she had expected, Akane thought.

Called to the stage next were teams A and D - the Kunos were A, of course. Kodachi must've been a minor celebrity in the gymnastics martial arts scene judging by the roars of the crowd as she and her brother took the stage.

"Uh… Where's your third?" the referee asked.

"A question most justified!" Tatewaki replied. "I believe them to be late. No matter, I have faith they will show up before the end of the competition! So were the terms of the deal!"

The judges deliberated between themselves, eventually coming to an agreement. "If your third partner does not show up in time for the finals, your team will be disqualified."

"OH HO HO HO HO HO! Fine by me!" Kodachi did a little pirouette, turning herself towards the opposing team. "It just gives me more time to put on a dazzling performance while the stage is all mine!"

"Do not forget me, sister dearest!" Tatewaki interrupted, his smile and crossed arms doing little to hide the vein popping up on his forehead.

"Oh, how could I ever," she replied in a sarcastic tone.

For as much as they got in each other's faces, they certainly knew how to work together. After toying with their opponents for some time to rack up style points, Kodachi effortlessly immobilizing one of her opponents with her ribbon while Tatewaki enthusiastically clubbed the other two, Kodachi jumped off of her brother's shoulders, leaping into the air like an angel, before finishing up their neatly lined up, bruised adversaries with a dive, striking all three of them with a rubber ball.

The semi-finals went quite the same as the previous matches, leaving the five of them to patiently wait in the ring for the arrival of the Kunos' third member.

Ranma idly practiced twirling his ribbon, his patience running thin. "Is your third gonna make us wait that damn long!?"

Tatewaki sat down and crossed his legs. "Patience, sapphic Ranko. Patience is what you seek." He pointed his index upwards, closing his eyes. "In such a situation where you can only wait… Meditate. Do not delay, lest you later regret it. The Buddha, Sallekha Sutta."

"So do ya just select half-fittin' quotes and force them into what ya're sayin', or?" Ranma growled.

Tatewaki opened one eye. "Any time and place is a good occasion for the teachings of the Buddha."

"Well, since we're already waiting…" Kodachi slithered next to Ranma, making him uncomfortable. "Could you point me to your brother in the crowd? Surely he would not miss his lover's big moment?"

"Enough, foolish sister!" Tatewaki exclaimed. "There is much too little reason to speculate on Saotome Ranma and his friend's sexualities!"

"And yet you allow yourself to call the shots on my friends Akane and Ranko, hmm?" Kodachi replied.

Tatewaki stood up suddenly, tightly balling his fist. "The situation is nothing alike! Lesbians are wielders of the world's greatest swords, they are warriors of talent that deserve respect! Of course I would devote myself to recognizing, respecting and defending their existence!"

Kodachi shook her head. "To that I reply, men blessed by Achilles are precious masters of empathy, they are emotional altruists that deserve the world's celebration and protection!"

"FOR THE LAST TIME, NONE OF US ARE DANG TOGETHER!" Ranma screamed at the top of his lungs, prompting the crowd to attention.

Tatewaki looked at Ranma with a frown on his face, before a flicker of understanding appeared in his warm, dumb eyes. "Aaaah. I see." He winked conspiratorially twice. "Yes, you are indeed single and straight, you can count on me to say as much to anybody who would listen. We wouldn't want them forcing you out of the closet, after all."

"I ain't in no cupboard, either!" Ranma replied, balling his fist in front of his face.

"Ranma I don't think that's what he… urgh, nevermind." Akane said.

"Sister!" Tatewaki announced. "You have understood, haven't you!? Saotome Ranma and his friend are single as well!"

Kodachi looked at Ryoga as if demanding a confirmation. She jumped to assuming when the pig boy merely replied with dead fish eyes. "Oh ho ho ho ho ho! Yes, I verily agree, brother dearest! Oh ho ho ho ho ho!"

Akane was almost relieved when she heard a frantic stomp coming from the changing rooms.

The relief didn't last long as a giant panda jumped on stage.

"P-Pops!?" Ranma shrieked, taken aback. "What are ya doin' here!?" His eyes darted around in the crowd, looking for Nabiki. When he finally found her, her devious smile was all he needed to understand what was her contingency plan.

The panel of judges recoiled in their seats. "T-That's your third member!?" one of them piped up.

"The brave animal…! One of the cages in its zoo needs repairs, and they are so underfunded, you see…!" Ranma was concerned by how genuine Tatewaki's tears were. "Since more money is of no use to us, you can understand our charity!" The Kunos and their money would be soon parted if they didn't learn to spot his pop's lies soon, Ranma thought.

"I-it's okay, it's okay!" the judge replied, waving his hands. "Uhh… Does it understand the rules?"

Genma lifted up a wooden placard with the word "Yes".

Akane tightened her grip on her ribbon. Ryoga was the only one on par with Kodachi, so those two would probably fight it on, but she would have to keep an eye out for any surprise attack the Kuno sister could try to sneak on Ranma or her. Speaking of Ranma, he would probably fixate exclusively on his dad… So that left Tatewaki. He mostly had a supportive role to his sister from the matches she had watched, and she had a slight edge on him, but she really wasn't confident in her gymnastics abilities.

"This is one last reminder that tools must be used in all attacks! Barehanded strikes are forbidden, so are bear handed ones!" The referee, after observing each contestant for a second, quickly lowered her hand. "And… begin!"

Kodachi was the first to strike, ensnaring Ranma's hand in her ribbon after ignoring his pitiful attempt at a counter-attack.

"Lemme go! Lemme go, dangit!" Ranma pulled and pulled, to no avail.

"Oh ho ho ho ho ho ho! I am ever so sorry, Ranko friend, but I'm afraid I will not lose this fight!" Kodachi boasted before having to dodge a club attack from Ryoga. "Admirable attempt, handsome face, but you won't catch me off guard as easily as your lover's sister!"

"Raaaah!" Ryoga raged. "And why the 'handsome', too!? I'm delicate! De-li-cate!"

In his anger, he missed a second ribbon coming from Tatewaki, which quickly wrapped itself around his hand. The two Kunos twisted their ribbons together until Ryoga and Ranma had their hands ensnarled right against one another.

After dispatching Genma much too easily for her tastes with a single strike of a club that sent him unconscious, Akane turned around to see the trap the two boys had fallen right into. "Aaaand, we're doomed," she muttered to herself.

"Lemme go! Stop pullin'!" Ranma complained.

"You're the one that's pulling!" Ryoga retorted.

Ranma's eyes suddenly narrowed and he looked straight at the ceiling. Akane followed his gaze just in time to see it explode into pieces in a loud boom, a figure falling along with the debris. Wielding an oversized club, it dove straight for Ranma, who tripped up Ryoga during his dodge.

In the middle of the arena stood a young girl with blue hair made up in two buns.


	11. A Very Special Shampoo

The spectating crowd fled the scene in a panic.

The girl stood still for a second before pulling her weapon out of the ground.

Akane reflexively recoiled, taking a defensive stance. She observed the girl for a second. She had a very soft and pleasant face, that much she had to admit, but there was coldness in the expression she bore, like she was wearing a mask. She had deep, sharp blue eyes that would intimidate anybody with a single glance.

Akane felt her cheeks flush and promptly hid them behind her arm.

The girl was dressed in Chinese attire, somewhat reminiscent of Ranma's usual choice of clothing. She looked around for a second, pausing as she spotted Ranma. Her eyebrows twitched and she stood still for two seconds more before lifting her club in his direction. "Ran… R… Man one, die!"

Ranma scrambled back to his feet, pulling Ryoga with him, their hands still tangled in the ribbons. "Sh-Shampoo! How the hell did ya find me!?"

"You know this girl?" Akane asked.

Shampoo turned her gaze towards Akane and Akane felt her face turn hot again. The girl then spotted the panda at Akane's feet and the barest hint of a feeling showed up on her face: anger. She leaped into the air and clubbed the animal in the belly, who screamed and flopped out of the ring. Had he only been pretending to be knocked out?

"How dare you attack a noble animal while it is down!" Tatewaki shouted. He grabbed one of the poles on the side of the ring and pulled it out to use it as a makeshift katana before running straight towards Shampoo.

She retaliated by swinging her weapon like a golf club and sending him flying through the roof and twinkling away in the sky.

"BROTHER DEAREST!" Kodachi wailed, jumping off the ring and giving chase in the direction he had been sent.

Shampoo turned her eyes back towards Ranma.

"Listen, I'm real' sorry, 'kay? I didn't mean - I'd panicked!" Ranma tried to argue. "I ain't wanna marry you!"

"Marry!?" Ryoga and Akane asked in unison.

Shampoo's mouth hung half open for a moment. She let out a long, drawn-out breath, that chilled Akane to the bone. The girl was terrifying.

Ranma tried to turn tail and run, only to be stopped dead in his tracks by Ryoga, who took one moment too long to understand Ranma wasn't interested in fighting Shampoo. They both avoided her club by a hair's width and the near-death experience finally kickstarted Ryoga's reflexes; they fled as quickly as their uncoordinated legs could take them. "You… die!" Shampoo stated, apparently to herself…? She would've shouted if she had wanted Ranma to hear her, right? She then gave chase as quickly as she could.

"Wait!" Akane promptly ran after all three of them, worried for Ranma and Ryoga's safety.

"So what's the situation with this girl?" Ryoga asked in the middle of their tied jog. He turned his head back and grimaced at noticing Shampoo was still right at their feet, her weapon barely missing them by inches.

Their fleeing led them straight out of the gymnasium. Ranma pointed at the roofs of the nearby buildings, and after a quickly coordinated hop, the two teens managed to get some distance away from Shampoo by escaping by the housetops. "D'ya want the short story or all of it?"

Unfortunately, the Chinese woman gave chase, not too far from them. "I want enough to understand why my buddy's being chased down by someone that wants to both kill him and marry him."

Ranma sighed heavily. "So it started not long after we'd left Jusenkyo… A couple months ago, tops.

"We were passin' thru her village. Not far from the springs, like, we're talkin' walkin' distance. We'd been trainin' on an empty stomach for a week, couldn't afford to pay our guide no more, though he stuck around. Betcha it's in his contract that he has to stick with the people his dang spring curses until they leave China, cuz I can't figure out why otherwise.

"A week's far from the longest time we'd spent without food, ya know how Pops is, but we were still starvin'. The guide said we were approachin' the village of the Chinese Amazon. Turns out when we arrived, they were havin' a martial arts tournament!

"Lemme tell ya, that Shampoo, she knows how to fight. There was some food left on a table nearby and Pops jumped on it immediately, stuffin' his face. I'll be honest, I kinda followed, like, when you're hungry ya don't fix that by starin' down a mountain a' food, ya get me?

"And for the record, I really thought it was like, a spectator banquet or somethin', like it was a big town party with a free for all feast!

"But nah, the whole dang table was just the prize for the first place at their tournament, and Shampoo had just won it!" Ranma's face got lost in reflection for a second. "...Dammit."

"Dammit what?" Ryoga asked. He took a moment to look behind him. Shampoo was still following them with a deathly gaze as they jumped from roof to roof.

"Forgot to mention something. At this point in the story, I was in my soft mood, you know the one?" Ranma explained, apparently oblivious to the fact he had just slipped into it.

Of course Ryoga knew of that quirk. He'd known of it since their time together at Matsuribi Buta's middle school; Ranma was his best buddy, he couldn't have missed something that big. "Unusual of you to refer to it like that. It's just how you are, you know? You change your mind fast is all."

Ranma took a moment to mull over his friend's words. "…You're probably right. I've been overthinking it lately. Anyways, surprisingly, Shampoo wasn't _too _mad we'd eaten her food? Well, more precisely, she wasn't mad I did, but my dad still took a beating. The guide translated that she was happy to, erm…" Ranma started mumbling, suddenly much less sure about what he was about to say. " …share her food with a cute girl."

Ryoga felt a pang at his heart. How unbearably lucky Ranma was that everybody mistook him for a girl. Ryoga felt his fist clench and swing at Ranma's face.

Ranma avoided the strike on reflexes alone. He pouted. "What was that for, you meanie!?"

"...No reason. Don't fall behind now," Ryoga said, turning his attention back to their path and speeding up.

"If you're not interested in listening to my story, just say so!" Ranma complained.

Akane really hadn't woke up this morning expecting to jog through the streets in a leotard chasing after three idiots running on rooftops, but then again, her life had been anything but predictable ever since Ranma came around.

Ranma and Ryoga seemed to be talking about something but she couldn't catch it from there. There was some movement she couldn't quite read, then the two of them sped up, leaving Shampoo in the dust.

That was odd. The girl was definitely running faster earlier. Why didn't she give chase?

The two boys took a sharp turn to the right and Shampoo continued straight forward. Akane frowned and followed the Chinese girl, then sped up to get ahead of her and look at her face.

She still bore the same deathly glare as usual, as far as Akane could tell.

Then Shampoo collided with a satellite dish and tumbled off the roof.

Akane nearly stumbled as she slowed down, then approached the spot where the girl had fallen down. Now seemed like the right time to get the answer to some questions.

Shampoo popped out of the side alley looking all red in the face and apparently unfazed by it. She paused, and patted away the dirt on her clothes.

Akane wasn't sure how to start the interrogation.

Shampoo noticed her and gave her another instance of her icy death glare.

Akane's face heated up and she was much more sure she had no idea how to start the interrogation.

Shampoo lifted a finger and pointed at Akane. She opened her mouth and kept it agape for a few seconds before exhaling. Akane stood her ground, feeling dangerous vibes coming from Shampoo. "Ah… you were with Ran… Man one, yes?"

Akane grit her teeth and refocused herself. "Where do you know him from!?" she snarled.

"I…" Shampoo's finger was still held in the air, ominously directed at Akane. "Shampoo looks… for Ranko. Other one. Not… man one."

Did she mean the curse? Did she think Ranma's two bodies were separate people, or…? No, that didn't make sense. She'd found Ranma in girl form earlier and still called him the 'man one'. But then… did Shampoo know of the two sides of Ranma? Akane tentatively, slowly lowered her guard. Shampoo let her pointing hand fall to her side. "What exactly do you know about, uh… the two of them?"

Shampoo started fiddling with her club, twirling its handle in her hand. "Ranko is cute nice girl. Well mannered. Ranma is evil spirit in Ranko's mind. Violent boy. I kill, so I can have Ranko always."

That was the longest cohesive string of words Akane had heard Shampoo say since meeting her. "Do you mean the evil spirit part literally?" It was worth asking; after Jusenkyo, who knew what other kind of magic was possible.

"Literally?" Shampoo asked.

Akane tilted her head ever so slightly. "Are you thinking he is an actual evil spirit or are you just saying he's mean?"

"I… Shampoo means…" Her voice took on a droning quality to it, like she was quoting someone. "I apologize, I have trouble speaking and I do not always get double meanings. Please be understanding."

Akane blinked twice. "…What?"

"I apologize, I have trouble speaking and I do not always get double meanings," Shampoo repeated.

The two boys winded down as they reached the park they had fought in recently. Ranma took a moment to catch his breath while Ryoga focused on untangling the ribbons on their arms.

Ryoga rubbed his wrist as it finally got free. "You said this girl comes from a village of Amazons, or something?"

Ranma stretched, then sat against a nearby tree. He hoped to get out of this leotard soon. "That's how the guide called it, at least. Everybody there was a woman — Wait, no, almost everybody. A few guys running around, I guess." He looked around for a second. Huh, the tree they had uprooted was still in the lake.

"Are they all lesbians, then, or just Shampoo?" Ryoga asked.

Ranma rolled his eyes. He thought it was Tatewaki that saw lesbians everywhere, not Ryoga. "She's not a lesbian. First off, she's head over heels for me."

Ryoga sat down next to him. "Yeah, but she thinks you're a girl, right?"

Ranma shook his hands with an uneasy smile. "I tried to clear up the misunderstanding, I swear!"

"Okay, but she's still a girl pining after another 'girl'," Ryoga explained. "She's a lesbian."

Ranma froze, eyes stuck on his friend's face. He tried to protest; that didn't make sense, did it? He opened his mouth, trying to think of any counterpoint. She was running after him, and he was a man! So therefore… But she thought he was a girl. And despite that she was still going for him.

His cheeks gradually heated up until they felt like they were on fire. "...Oh my god, she's a lesbian."

Ryoga tried to stand up and slipped, face faulting. "You hadn't realized!?"

_Shampoo is a lesbian. She's into girls. She's after me while being convinced I'm a woman. She wants to love me as if I was a girl. _Two thin columns of steam started rising out of Ranko's ears.

Ryoga settled back in his last position and crossed his arms. "Must be nice to be desired by a gay girl. How much more woman could you get if you reached that point?"

Ranko — (he really had to stop himself from using that name anymore, it was worrying how often he slipped up) Ranma chuckled. "I know, right? It's like they have double the reasons to know what a woman is, and you pass both tests."

They glanced at one another with an amused smirk on each of their faces, then shared a sigh, once again reminded of the fact they weren't women, which is a sigh that people that are men definitely regularly make.

"So how does that lead into her wanting to kill you?" Ryoga asked.

"She kissed me. She kissed me and I panicked, changed my mind, got angry, kicked her in the chest and ran." Ranma grimaced, but at getting no reaction from his friend, continued on. "That's when the troubles started. She tracked us all throughout the rest of our trip in China. Somehow, she had noticed my tendency for mood changes and started to think I was two different people. Makes no sense, right? But that's why she wants to kill me, I guess. Get rid of the 'other' me so she can be with me."

Ryoga blinked thrice. His grip on his arms got tighter… and he chuckled, apparently very amused. "And now she's tracked you all the way to Japan!"

Ranma huffed and balled his fists. "It ain't took her four years at least, unlike you!"

Ryoga froze, a single tear pearling at the corner of his eye. "Argh… touché…"

Ranma shook his head and got up. It had been long enough that it was pretty obvious they'd lost her for good. "Let's just go to the Tendos. Ain't no chance Shampoo's gonna find us there if she don't know of the place, and I really wanna get outta this thing." He paused. "And I should probably turn back so she don't recognize me. Ya think Dr. Tofu would have spare clothes that'd fit me?"

"Lead the way…" Ryoga replied while getting up, self-consciousness written all over his face.

"More tea, Shampoo-chan?" Kasumi asked, holding up a teapot boiling, for once, actual leaves. Oftentimes the kettle was filled with plain water lately.

The Chinese girl was busy staring down the top of her cup. Akane could swear she'd manage to turn the steaming liquid into ice if she kept that up. "...Bitter," Shampoo replied before pushing the cup away.

Kasumi's eyelid twitched. She stood up and inched forward, hands held against her apron. "How about I fetch some snacks, then? Would that be alright, Shampoo-chan?"

Shampoo perked up. For just a moment, her eyes lost their usual edge. "I like sugar."

"Sweets it is, then." Kasumi left the room and headed to the kitchen.

Akane rested her head on the back of her hands and turned back towards Shampoo. Shampoo noticed her and stared right back at her, her cold look coming back. By now though, it had lost most of its effect on Akane, a fact she was thankful for. "So… Ranma, huh? Out of all people, he's the one that caught your eye?"

Shampoo took a moment to process the question. "Mama told Shampoo that love is first sight."

Akane was starting to have no idea if Shampoo was enigmatic or just very straightforward.

A pair of recognizable voices approached from the garden side of the living room while in the middle of a conversation. "I think you could've done worse for someone hellbent on killing you," the heavier of the two said.

"Like you, ya mean?" the other, snappy yet still masculine, replied. Ranma opened the door, eyes quickly turning from Ryoga behind him to the inside of the room. "I dunno if ya realize, but—" He stopped immediately upon spotting Shampoo and slowly slid to the ground in shock, hand still holding the door.

Kasumi came back, opening up the packaging of store bought choco anpan cookies. "Say hi to our guest, Ran… ma-chan, Akane brought her here."

He crawled on the ground towards Akane. "What the hell are ya thinkin', ya dumb tomboy!?"

"Shampoo here is actually pleasant company once you get to know her," Akane replied. _Unlike you, _she thought.

"How much did she tell you?" he asked.

Shampoo grabbed his head, having apparently approached silently. She observed him from multiple angles before moving on to touching his torso, staying silent all throughout.

"So it _is _her first time meeting the male you, huh?" Ryoga muttered, popping from the screen door he'd hid behind.

"...Male you?" she repeated, her hands still holding Ranma's head.

"Wait, she understands Japanese?" Ryoga asked, incredulous.

"Chinese: A, mathematics: A, physics: A, chemistry: A, biology: A, history: A, English: A, Japanese: A, Setswana: A, geography: A, sports: A," Shampoo recited. "Aussie: A."

Akane and Ryoga shared a glance.

She patted her hand on the table looking for her cup of tea, and when she found it, she lifted it and threw its contents on Ranma's face. She tilted her head slightly to the side when boy Ranma still stood in front of her.

Akane grimaced. It seems Shampoo did know of Jusenkyo… It was just luck that she thought Ranma's curse went the other direction.

Shampoo's head snapped around when she heard Kasumi deposit the cookies on a plate on the table, and she went to munch on them, completely defocusing from Ranma.

Ranma stood shell-shocked.

"…Would you like anything else?" Kasumi asked to put a stop to the uneasy silence.

Shampoo thought for a moment, still gobbling down the chocolate sweets. "Paper and ink."

Ranma shook his head to rid his hair of the tea and stood up. "I'mma go change." He couldn't hand this shirt back to Dr. Tofu without washing it, now. He stomped out and up to the second floor. His last two shirts were respectively in the wash and back at the gymnasium, and the 'China' overalls were obviously off limits while he couldn't be a girl, so he supposed he would have to borrow some of his Pops' clothes.

As he headed for his room, he felt an uneasy aura coming from Nabiki's. Oh, right, with the tournament ending prematurely… Looks like he'd have to wait for her to be in a better mood if he wanted that hint she'd promised him.

Once changed, he came back down to the living room. Shampoo was busy scribing away something while the rest of the group bunched up around her, looking at her handiwork.

Finally, she lifted the paper in front of her, a big smile on her face.

Akane furrowed her eyes as she tried to read it. "…That's Chinese."

"Oops," Shampoo said. She settled the paper back down, flipped it and started over, in Japanese this time. After a few minutes she had finished once again and she handed it to Akane. "You give to Ranko, yes?"

Akane's eyes frantically scanned the paper, confusion growing on her face the further she read. She then gave it to Ryoga, who laughed, who handed it to Kasumi, who let out a gasp and finally gave it to Ranma.

It read '_ My beloved, I want to rid you of the evil within you that keeps getting in the way of our love. Would you be available tomorrow? I will bring my heaviest chuí . _

_Shampoo _'

Ryoga finally stopped laughing. "Well that's one way to write a challenge letter."

"You do know you can't exactly kill Ranma in a way that wouldn't also kill Ranko, right?" Akane asked Shampoo.

Shampoo looked right back at her. Akane grew uneasy as she realized Shampoo was genuinely processing her words. "...Oh."

Ranma tripped onto the ground before immediately recovering, arms tense against his body. "Do ya ever consider anythin' thru, ya two-speeds thinker!?"

As the evening winded down and it became obvious Shampoo had no place to stay, she was offered the Saotomes' broken room to sleep in, since it was better than nothing and Akane categorically refused to let her sleep in the dojo with Ryoga and Ranma.

Akane was left with so much to muse on as she practiced her strikes under the waning sun.

There was now a gay girl living under her roof, and she was nothing like Akane thought lesbians were. Weren't they supposed to all be, you know, tomboys? And, sure, Shampoo knew how to fight, and she had a certain _uniqueness _, but… she still came off as feminine. So, maybe… the two things were unrelated?

Another thing she was much less willing to think about was the twinge of jealousy at the idea of Shampoo whisking Ranko away. Erm, Ranma away.

Ranma, meanwhile, was taking care of the laundry. It gave a small break to Kasumi, plus he had to make sure Dr. Tofu's borrowed clothes would be in the next wash.

With Shampoo's reappearance in his life, he'd started thinking of her misunderstanding again, about the idea that he was two, and put it together with the more recent thoughts along that line.

Eventually, he shook his head. _Like something like that could even happen_, he thought in unison with the other voice in his mind.

As for Shampoo, she was busy thinking up another plan to get rid of Ranma. She suddenly remembered she had left her bag of tricks on the roof of the gymnasium, and she could go fetch it tonight… But the gaping hole in the room kept bugging her and interrupting her train of thought. She would need to fix that first.


	12. Shampoo Enigma

So, turns out this story is more popular here than on Ao3 so I might have reconsider my decision not to port the author's notes here. Guess I'll have to make do with this website not implementing them in the best way... or barely at all.

Love when the original series has so good dialogue I barely need to touch it up a notch. Despite my promise to myself back in chapter 1 not to stress out over this story, I've let my expectations balloon again, and having the original work as a crutch to rely back on definitely puts some pressure off of me.

* * *

Shampoo stifled a satisfied yawn as she looked back at her handiwork. The new wall was pristine, perfect, identical to the old one— you wouldn't even know it had ever been broken. She had been meticulous in reproducing it, and such hard work deserved a reward. She had met a boy that held the same name as her love's brain demon in this household, which in itself was a bit odd — but she had already confirmed it wasn't a matter of Jusenkyo, so. Most importantly, where was the girl of her dreams? The short-haired girl had told her she lived here, at least, so maybe it was just a matter of looking around.

Shampoo tore down the door and headed to the floor below to start her search.

Her journey first brought her to the kitchen, where she spotted the oldest sister busily preparing the day's bentos. Shampoo moved on quickly, sweeping one corridor at a time, familiarizing herself with the layout of the house. The next door she opened led to a bedroom decorated in grey tones, save for an ornate butsudan; but, looking at the bed, it was an old, lanky man that lived there, not her beloved. He was looking right at her, blinking confusedly at her intrusion — not that she understood that's what his expression meant. She closed the door and continued, finding the laundry room, then a dead end to a closed door.

She circled back around and found the living room she had had tea in yesterday, and on the opposite side, an open double door led straight to the garden. She spotted her love's stupid pet panda sleeping outside by the koi pond and let joy overtake her; that was a sign her crush couldn't be far!

Shampoo walked around the garden for a while, observing the morning dew until she found the dojo. She entered the smaller building and finally found the girl she had been looking for! Ranko looked to be sleeping uncomfortably due to some water dripping from the roof onto her face. Oh, poor, poor Ranko…! That simply wouldn't do.

"Goooood morning Tokyoooo! If you were just pulled awake by your radio alarm, it's seven in the morning, I'm your host Kirby Williams, and you're listening to Martial Arts Radio, the only radio show where we combine tips for your special techniques with your favorite songs! Next up: Dream Balloons!"

Akane silenced her alarm by smashing her hand on its snooze button. Her head sleepily limped to the side and she yawned, covering her mouth. Alarm clock meant it was a school day. School day meant she had to go wake Ranma up.

She pulled herself out of bed little by little, rubbing her hands on her face. After getting into her school uniform, she got out of her room and took note of Ranma's, now temporarily Shampoo's. The hole in the wall was still here, it seemed. She went down the stairs, then her brain connected two and two together and she ran back up. The hole had gone from the exterior-facing wall to the stairs-facing one? What?

After spending way too much time staring agape at the scene trying to comprehend the internal logic of doing this, she headed downstairs once more and went to the living room. Dad and Kasumi were already there, convening for breakfast. Kasumi spotted her and smiled. "Akane-chan, would you go wake Ranko-chan, please?"

"I was already on it. Where's Nabiki?"

"Oh, I tried to get her out of her room, but she sounded sick, so I was planning to call the school and let her have a sick day. She did tell me to tell you one thing, though."

"And that would be?"

Kasumi cleared her throat, enunciating her sister's words as clearly as she could. "'It'll be 40,000 yen now.'"

Akane's eyes narrowed, vexed.

Her father flipped a page of his newspaper and looked at his cup of coffee, evaluating that it was still too hot to drink, if the steam was any indication. "Akane." His eyes moved to his daughter. "Do you know that girl I saw this morning?"

"Oh! That's Shampoo, Dad. She's… another friend of Ranma." Akane failed to find a way to describe her that wasn't just blurting out she was, well, attracted to women. "Did you miss her last night?"

"I came home pretty late; you know how work is." His eyes narrowed, and his tone turned into something faux-disinterested. "So how's life with Ranma been lately?"

Akane breathed in and froze. She raised her hand and let it droop back down. "Well, uh… You know…" She opened and closed her fist a few times. "Yeah."

Soun bit his lip, took a sip of coffee, burned his tongue, and finished downing his drink. "Well-I'll-be-late-for-work-I-love-you-all-my-sweethearts-have-a-nice-rest-of-your-day-bye." He suddenly stood up and hurried out of the room.

Kasumi and Akane exchanged a glance. "I'm just gonna… yeah," the younger one said, heading out and to the dojo.

"_And now, from one awkward moment to the next_," Akane thought.

She opened the door and turned her head towards Ryoga and Ranma's sleeping bags. "Ranma! How long are you gonna—" She froze as she finally found Shampoo's whereabouts, gently snoozing in the same bed as Ranma, notably in his girl form.

Her eyebrow twitched; she headed back to the kitchen and put a teapot on the stove.

Ranma felt the sensation of being underwater, and quickly realized he was having the mermaid dream again… though he wasn't sure where exactly he was. The usually azure ocean was muddy around these parts, the coral reef was dead. He could hear something rumbling softly under the sand.

"Ranko? Where are ya?" he shouted. His mermaid doppelganger seemed absent. Worried, he started scouting his surroundings.

The further in he went, the darker the water turned. Slowly, the reef gave way to ominously-erected concrete walls. A shiver of familiarity went down Ranma's spine. Something felt unsafe here, but it'd take more than that to make him turn back.

Pain in his head suddenly flared when he spotted claw marks on one of the walls. His heart skipped a beat and his skin felt clammy.

That's when he noticed he was no longer underwater.

He heard the sound of a rusted grate closing somewhere above him. Turning his head up, he found he was stuck in a room and this was the only source of light.

His legs fell underneath him. All the walls around him were covered in claw marks. His body refused to listen to him, refused to be here. He was completely paralyzed.

"Ranma!" Ranko shouted from the other side of the grate as she grabbed hold of it and shook it. "What are you doing in here!?"

His neck craned upwards. "Ranko…"

The rumbling stopped.

He heard a stomp.

Then another.

Coming closer.

With great effort, he managed to get himself back on his knees and he turned around.

A gigantic creature was slowly approaching him. Its paw alone, the only thing the light from the grate allowed him to make out, was at least half of Ranma's height.

It growled. Drool dripped out of its mouth and onto the floor.

"Come on, come on, come on…!" Ranko pushed, pulled, shook the grate as strongly as she could until it finally came undone. Water poured inside the small cell.

It was burning hot…

…

…HOT!

"HOOOOT!" Ranma wailed, dragging himself out from under his blanket. Catching his breath, he immediately noticed his fiancée standing next to him, a scowl on her face and an empty teapot in her hands. "What'd ya do that for, Akane!?"

Akane huffed and walked away.

"…What's goin' on…?" He tried to think back to what he was dreaming about. There was something scary…? No luck. He couldn't remember anything else. Fat good that did him.

Two delicate hands grabbed his head and turned it around until he faced their owner, a half-asleep Shampoo. She muttered something in Chinese he didn't understand.

"S-Shampoo…" Ranma muttered, blushing.

She tilted her head and let go of his head. "Why are you brain demon's name sharer? Where Ranko go?"

Suddenly remembering the deathwish Shampoo had on him kickstarted his brain to full awareness. "Wait a minit', what are YOU doin' in here!?"

She pointed up to the ceiling. Ranma's gaze followed and instantly came upon a frightening amount of tape and glue holding a weird contraption together, redirecting away rain that was leaking through the roof. "Water was dripping on Ranko. Shampoo fix."

On the bed next to them, Ryoga stirred awake, rubbing his eye. A splash of water fell on the top of his head. Then another. Then a bucket's worth of it all poured down at once.

Akane sat back down at the living room table.

"Is Ranko-chan awake now?" Kasumi asked her, handing her a bowl of rice.

Akane didn't reply, stuffing food in her face to be done with it as quickly as she could.

Three pairs of legs were heard running in the corridor. "'S TOO EARLY FOR THIIIIS!" Ranma complained as he passed by the open door, with Shampoo right on his tail.

"RANMA! SHAMPOO! DIE! I'LL KILL YOU BOTH!" a pig-nosed Ryoga shouted, running after them and swinging kicks whenever they were in range.

Kasumi sighed, a tired smile on her face, and gently tried to call out to them. "Will you all be joining us for breakfast…?"

Akane slammed her empty bowl on the table and reached for seconds.

Ranma somehow managed to lose them both just long enough to head to the bathroom and quickly douse himself in cold water. He took five seconds to breathe in and out, letting his temper wash off. When he popped his head back out, Shampoo and Ryoga were battling it out in the laundry room. He grimaced. More than anything, he hoped he would get to sneak out before Shampoo noticed him, but that hope was immediately dashed as the Chinese girl turned her head towards him.

"Pretty Ranko!" she cooed, just before taking a punch from Ryoga. She turned his head back to him and gave him her icy stare. "Pig muscle boy is satisfied, now?"

Ryoga winced as if he had just received three punches to the gut. "I yield…"

Shampoo jumped at Ranma's neck and hugged him too tightly. "Shampoo found you now! We get rid of brain demon, yes?"

Ranma grimaced, avoiding eye contact. "I don't think that's a good idea..."

None of them saw Akane's schoolbag coming as its owner struck Ranko right on top of her head with it. She swore she could make out the Big Dipper from how many stars she was seeing.

Shampoo looked at the improvised weapon, then glared at Akane.

"You're all really trying my patience! Honestly! Do you all have to be so loud this early in the morning?" Akane shouted. The Tendo home had become anything but calm, and three people seemed to be her breaking point.

"You jealous?" Shampoo asked without skipping a beat.

Akane felt her cheeks flush and she refused to engage with Shampoo's question. How had she even come to that conclusion? "Ranma, get dressed immediately. We'll be late for school." She turned around and slammed the door behind her, then jogged to the entrance to keep herself from thinking that Shampoo's explanation made more sense than hers.

"I'm tellin' ya, Shampoo didn't ask before gettin' in my bed!" Ranma, back in his boy form, argued, running as fast as he could on top of the river's fence as they headed for school.

"I'd guessed, but I also didn't ask!" Akane retorted.

Well, this conversation seemed a lost cause, as far as Ranma was aware. "Ya don't really listen to anybody, do ya…?" He hopped off the fence to run by her side.

"You don't seem to be doing much to get her off of clinging on you either, in case you think I didn't notice!" Hearing this, Ranma felt like he had to object, but a growing self-consciousness at the back of his mind kept him from arguing back. It's not like she was wrong… "Go ahead! Fall in love with her for all I care!"

Ranma guiltily turned his head away. He'd rather not make Akane feel bad. His enjoyment of Shampoo's attention was just another thing about him that kept flip-flopping, but Akane had no way of knowing that. "I'm sorry…" he mumbled.

Akane leaned forward a bit to take a look at his face, then sighed. "It's not your fault. Shampoo just does whatever she wants all the time."

"I know, but still…" Ranma sighed. Securing his schoolbag between his arm and his torso, he glanced at his hands, holding them together. He assessed he was better off being honest. "I feel like either I can't bring myself to tell her off, or when I can, I don't want to…"

"It would be so much easier to be angry at you if you were spineless and a skirt chaser _at the same time_." Akane huffed and sped up. Ranma scrambled to follow her.

From a roof across the street, a certain melodramatic individual was watching them run off. A gentle breeze blew in his hair, the cicadas chanting a melancholic ballad for his broken soul. "_Akane, Ranma… We must part without saying goodbye,_" Ryoga thought, hoping his unspoken words would reach them anyway. He looked up at the sky and could make out his friends' faces in the clouds above. "_Akane, you said you wished to be my friend, that I could tell you everything. But I would never bring myself to taint your pure-hearted soul with my darkened thoughts. I can't be like you and find beauty in my accursed form. Ranma! Oh, I missed being with you, but your life moved on, and I can't claim to hold you back. Go live the new era of your existence without the poor friend I was to you!_"

Ryoga jerked his head away from the sky, holding back tears. He imagined his friends' replies, cluelessly caring and kind. "_Ryoga… You'll always be welcome to our household, as a friend._" "_Aye! What Akane said!_"

"Like that'd really happen…" he muttered. "If it did… My heart of glass… would shatter into a million pieces!" Standing up suddenly, he jumped off the roof, leaving this chapter of his life behind. "Farewell, Akane, Ranma!"

A lithe foot bounced right on his head, using it as a stepping stone, and he plummeted to the river below.

Huh? Had Shampoo stepped on something just now? She stopped herself in her tracks and readjusted the strap of her bag of tricks. There was something in there that'd help her beloved and she had to make sure she wouldn't accidentally lose track of it. She turned around and looked down at the river, spotting the pig boy from this morning in there.

He looked right back at her and growled, which came out more as a squeal than anything. She hopped away and he gave chase.

The morning classes were excruciatingly long for Akane, who read any gaze from her classmates as judgemental and filled with misconceptions. Between the gymnastic tournament and Shampoo, she had gotten a break from the rumors on her sexuality at school, but she was now back in the fray and the whiplash was unpleasant. Every suspicious whisper she couldn't quite catch was targeted right at her, every idle conversation she wasn't a part of was all about her totally fabricated relationship with Ranma's fake sister, she just knew it. She would never let her guard down in a million years even if it killed her.

Meanwhile, Ranma quickly realized the student's rumor mill had long since moved on and he wondered why he'd even worried in the first place.

Lunch period eventually came around, but the general chatter and buzz of the students was suddenly interrupted as the building shook a few times.

"What was that?" a student asked. "An earthquake?" replied another.

The school shook again, the windows rattling in their frames.

"Sounds like it's getting closer…" The crowd's eyes turned towards the window right behind Ranma, who was standing completely still, his bento still in hand.

"Y'ever can't shake a feelin' you're about to be the butt of a joke?" The wall behind him exploded into rubble as Ryoga was thrown right through it, landing squarely on him.

"P-chan!" Akane shouted, jumping right out of her seat and scrambling to dig Ryoga out of the debris. Once he was relatively back on his feet, she helped Ranma out next, who refused her hand and stood back up by himself.

"That girl has strength like a bull's…" Ryoga muttered, using Akane as a crutch to catch his breath. Noticing the crowd around them, he quickly wrapped a few of his bandanas around his face to hide his nose and ears. The look he threw Shampoo afterwards made it clear he wasn't done fighting her yet.

Shampoo walked through the newly formed hole in the wall and stopped as she spotted Ranma. She looked at him for a second before giving him her icy stare. "Brain demon's name sharer. Where is Ranko?"

"Ah, uh, she ain't here," Ranma muttered, wishing that actually were true.

"Back off!" Akane shouted, placing herself between Shampoo and Ranma. "I've had enough! Maybe Ranma is too much of a coward to hit a girl, but if you continue to attack me and my friends, I will not stand by idly, Shampoo!"

Ranma didn't like the way this was escalating. "Oi now, I ain't hurt, I know Ryoga can take more than that, and, uh… ya know, 'Ranko' ain't here, so can't we all just let it go?"

Shampoo strongly shook her head, her hair whipping wildly through the air. "Shampoo doesn't wanna fight jealous girl. She can have Ranko too."

"I—" Akane grinded her teeth. "I DON'T WANT RANKO! I'M NOT INTO GIRLS!"

Shampoo tilted her head to the side. "What do you like then?"

Akane threw both of her hands onto her face before removing them and screaming wildly. "WHAT IS IT WITH PEOPLE NEEDING EVERYTHING SPELLED OUT TO THEM!?"

That gave Ranma pause for a second. "Why didn't ya just say boys?" he asked.

Akane grabbed him by the shirt and threw him right at the tree outside the classroom, knocking his wits out of him as he collided with the trunk. She turned back to Shampoo and pumped her fist in front of her face. "You're on, Shampoo!"

By the time Ranko made the jump back into the classroom, hot flashes of pain were pulsating in her head and causing an annoyingly familiar fog in her mind. From the sound of running she could barely make out, it seemed the others had already left. "Akane…" she muttered, giving chase as fast as her legs could take her through the headache.

As complicated as things often got between the three of them, she worried for their safety fighting Shampoo. She knew what the girl was capable of, and holding back wasn't one of them. Ranko struggled to find where they'd gone, making a thorough search of the school grounds, and losing herself precious minutes. She finally heard a pained wail coming from the sports field. That was Ryoga!

As if things weren't complicated enough as is, thin grey clouds started to fill the sky, thunder rumbling once as a prelude to a light shower. But with her umbrella at the shoe lockers, it would be more than enough to turn Ranko into a girl… The thought shook the fog out and reminded him that his name was Ranma.

Taking a mad dash, he ran to the door of the fence and pushed through, finding his two friends knocked out, lying on the grass. Between them, there was an empty bottle of shampoo. A calling card? Ranma picked it up. There was something written on the front in Chinese, and he started fearing the worst.

"Akane! Ryoga!" he shouted, stopping himself right next to them. He confirmed their breathing was steady and exhaled in relief. He placed his hand on Akane's cheek and gently caressed it. "Akane, wake up…"

No response.

A few droplets of rain started falling on Akane's cheeks. Ranma felt his skin prickle as his curse activated.

As more and more drops slowly drenched Ranma's back, Akane's eyelids flicked for a moment. She let out a whimper like she had just awoke from a long sleep, her eyes slowly, very slowly opening.

Then she blinked, twice. Her mouth hung open for a moment as she scrutinized Ranma's face.

"Akane? Are you okay? Did Shampoo do anything to you?" Ranma asked in worry.

Akane looked down at herself. Her eyes narrowed as she started studying one of her arms and its hand. "I'm taller."

Surprised, Ranma took a step back and bumped into Ryoga, causing him to stir. After a few moments, Ryoga started shaking, looking outright shell-shocked. "Wrong… It feels wrong…" he muttered. He shifted onto his side and curled into a ball, hugging his legs.

"So who are you?" Akane asked Ranma, approaching him.

"What do you mean? It's me, Ranma!" She didn't look like that had helped. "I'm your fiancé?"

Akane shook her head. "I can't have a fiancée, I'm a kid."

His heart sped up. "You're sixteen!"

"I am?" She looked down at herself. "That's weird."

Somewhere, instinctually, Ranma could feel this wasn't a joke. His heart was racing as he turned from Akane to Ryoga and back again, neither acting like their usual selves even in the mannerisms. He looked down at the bottle of shampoo in his hand. If anybody would know how to fix this, it'd be doctor Tofu, right…?

* * *

If you're interested in my original works, or just more transfeminine fiction in general, I've got a discord you're cordially invited to check out! We're a plural positive, pro inclusivity space with plenty of kindly people to meet. /VDVMVrc


	13. Mom

With thanks as usual to Pepper for instant feedback, Trismegistus Shandy for editing, and everybody else that contributed to keeping me motivated to write, including but not limited to my partners Katie and Jojo, Saffron, Samantha, kind comments left by readers, and many others.

* * *

As Akane understood it, and according to this pretty Ranma lady she was now walking behind on the way to Doctor Tofu's — she was somehow sixteen. Well, her body looked the part at least; it had her signature short hair she would never let grow long for the world, but that didn't match who she knew she was. She was still in junior school, she had two amazing big sisters, and two loving parents.

"Ya sure ya don't remember nothin'...?" the lady asked again. Akane had tired of answering this question by now and preferred not to reply. The lady readjusted the man she had slung over her back and turned her head back to the street ahead.

She looked sad. Which was a shame, because she was pretty. "Are you often told you're very pretty?" Akane blurted out. "And I don't mean by boys, I know they say that all the time. I mean people say it and mean it. Because I mean it!"

The lady's cheeks became all red. She let out a laugh that didn't go all the way and kind of faded at the end.

Ranma pressed the doorbell to Dr. Tofu's clinic and entered the waiting room. No one seemed to be there, thankfully, so he moved onwards to the office and laid Ryoga down onto a bed. "Stay strong, buddy, we'll figure out what's goin' on…"

"It feels all wrong…" Ryoga muttered. Ranma just wished he knew what was happening to him. Maybe it was related to his pig nose, but Ranma preferred not to use scalding water on Ryoga while he was already having a bad time.

"Well, hello, Ranma, Akane," Dr. Tofu said, announcing his presence. Ranma turned around. "What leads you here today?"

"Hi, Dr. Tofu!" Akane chipped, a grin on her face.

"I ain't sure… these two were battlin' Shampoo, and I guess she must'a done somethin', cuz by the time I got here, they were like…" Ranma gestured to Akane and Ryoga. "this."

"Shampoo?" Dr. Tofu asked.

"A martial artist from China. Long story."

"Let me see what I can gather, then." They pointed to a chair next to Ryoga's bed. "Akane, would you take a seat over there?"

"Sure!" She hopped a few times to reach the chair, apparently amazed at how much distance she covered in each step.

Already, Dr. Tofu looked as if he had an idea of what was going on. "That's a good girl."

Akane beamed again.

Ranma worried as he looked over Dr. Tofu's shoulder, trying to see their hands scrutinizing Akane's scalp.

"I don't see any injuries…" the good doctor muttered, looking at Akane's scalp, before moving on to Ryoga, who had been set on the bed and was still whimpering away. Last, they took a look at the empty bottle of shampoo Ranma had brought, and slowly read the Chinese label one character at a time. He flipped it over to look at its back, finding a simple number - 111. "If this is right, I know what happened..." Their glasses shone with an air of expertise as they spoke clearly. "An Amazon technique that weaponises shiatsu into a tool to lock away memories!"

"Shiatsu?" Ranma asked, not sure what the word meant.

"Yes!" Tofu had mistaken his implied question for incredulity. They approached their model skeleton and lifted it up, then started to press their fingers on different spots on its skull. "Using a combination of a shampoo made of specific Chinese herbs, as well as a precise massaging of the skull, this technique can manipulate memories in many ways, from locking away specific ones, to entire years of it at a time! If I had to guess, Akane believes she is a child because Shampoo locked everything as far back as her childhood."

Akane's eyes switched back and forth between Dr. Tofu and Ranma, listening carefully.

"D'ya know any way to revert it!?" Ranma asked.

Dr. Tofu nodded, holding the shampoo bottle forward to show it to him. "See this number on the back of the bottle? 111. The shampoos 110 through 118 manipulate memory in various ways, while 119 reverts their effects. I should be able to create a 119 from scratch, should I find the recipe, but maybe the person that did this to them carried one on their person?"

Ranma sighed in relief, content to know none of this was at risk of being permanent. Still, the sooner it'd be resolved, the better he would feel. It looked like he would need to hunt down Shampoo as fast as he could. "I'll be right on it!"

Dr. Tofu smiled, moving a chair next to Ryoga's bed and sitting down. "Good luck, Ranma. Please, do bring Akane home first. I will take care of your friend Ryoga, they do look a bit… catatonic. I couldn't let them in good conscience leave my office without a full checkup, plus I need to make sure they are under the same condition as Akane."

Ranma nodded, grabbing Akane's hand. The girl let herself be pulled away, and they were quickly out of Tofu's office and running through the street.

Tofu took one last glance at the bottle in their hand, a bit of worry in their mind they quickly shook off. "Surely nobody would be reckless enough to carry memory shampoos without antidote."

Akane had so many questions. She had stayed silent at the clinic, preferring to let the adults talk, but now her brain was on overdrive.

"So I'm sixteen?" she asked, walking up next to the Ranma lady.

Ranma took a few seconds to process the question. "That is correct, yes."

That was so cool! It was like she was in the future or something! She continued with another enquiry. "How did we meet?"

"I'm the…" Ranma looked down at herself and sighed. "…child of a friend of your dad. We live with you at the dojo, for now."

That was weird; she was missing the accent she had in Tofu's office. "Why do you talk different sometimes?"

Ranma raised an eyebrow. "What are you talking about?"

Ranma had said she was her fiancée, right? "So you're grown up me's girlfriend?"

Ranma's face went as red as her hair. "W-WHAT!?"

So many interesting questions to ask about the future, they continued to flow out of Akane's mind! "Did I win a martial arts medal yet?"

"Wait a second, could you back up a bit—"

"Did Kasumi and Tofu get married?"

"They're together?" Ranma muttered, taken aback.

"Is Nabiki an evil scientist now?"

"...What?"

"That's what she says she wants to be in the future," Akane stated.

Ranma raised an eyebrow and promptly lowered it back. It checked out, actually. He was somewhat relieved to see Akane was so full of life as a child, though that left him taken aback on how to handle her. And, of course, there had been the girlfriend question — he reddened a bit again just thinking about it. "Why would I be your girlfriend? Wouldn't you prefer to date a boy?"

Akane frowned, sticking her tongue out. "Boys are dumb and mean and they don't know how to take care of themselves. When I grow up, I'm gonna marry a girl." She turned her head to Ranma. "And didn't I do that, since we're fiancées?"

"…It's complicated." When did his life ever get so messy? Thinking about it a bit more, he recalled Tofu's words from a few weeks ago, about feelings Akane had told them about as a child.

And, at this point, this conversation would be as direct confirmation as he would ever get. Of the waterfall of stupidity constantly flowing out of Tatewaki's mouth, it had to be that one out of all of them he got right? Akane was undoubtedly bisexual, Ranma confirmed to himself. She had just spoken up about wanting to date a woman, and she seemed interested enough in him too, so that obviously covered the man part.

Akane couldn't resist the urge to run a few steps ahead. "Is everybody home? I wanna see how everybody's like in the future! Nabiki, Kasumi, Daddy, Mommy..."

Ranma stopped breathing for a moment. "Oh no."

Akane's smile faded slightly as they arrived at the Tendo's. Something just looked a little bit more sad about it compared to her memories. Maybe it was the weather? It did just rain after all.

She grabbed Ranma's hand, feeling a bit intimidated.

"Hmm?" Ranma looked at her hand, then at Akane. "Ya scared or somethin'?"

The accent had come back, Akane noted. She puffed her cheeks and walked to the front door. "Am not!"

She wasn't sure what she had expected, but it wasn't the entrance looking exactly as it had before, however many years ago her most recent memories were from (she didn't know for certain, for some reason).

There was a pleasant smell coming from the kitchen. Hmm… Mom was probably cooking up something good.

"I'm hooome!" Akane screamed at the top of her lungs, hoping to catch her attention. "Guess what happened today!"

"Akane?" a voice that wasn't Mom's replied. A lady came out of the kitchen, a pan in her hand. She had a soft ponytail falling over her shoulder, and was wearing Mom's apron. She walked back in the kitchen, came out without the pan and approached them. "Ranma too? Aren't you two supposed to be at school right now?"

"Yeah, 'bout that…" Ranma scratched the back of her head. "Akane kinda got attacked by Shampoo, 'n' like, now she's a kid again or somethin'…"

"What?" the lady asked, turning to Akane.

Akane beamed as she finally recognized who this was! "Big sis Kasumi! You're so pretty now!"

Kasumi held her hand to her mouth. "Oh my…"

Ranma started looking around, raising his head to look in the corridor. "Doc Tofu thinks Shampoo might have the cure, did ya see her around here?"

"What's with the ruckus?" Another lady interrupted the conversation, coming down the stairs holding a bag of ice against her head. Despite the casually well dressed clothes, she looked a bit sick.

"Nabiki?" Akane asked.

"Yeah?" she replied.

Akane turned to Kasumi. "Is she like this all the time?"

"No, she's just sick today."

Relieved, Akane climbed up the stairs jumping two steps at once and went to hug her big sister. "Nabiki!" She let her go and compared their heights. "We're so tall now!"

Nabiki threw a glance at Kasumi and Ranma, before descending the rest of the way and passing by them. "You know what, I don't even wanna know. I'm just gonna get a glass of water and go back to bed."

Akane didn't argue, refocusing her attention on her big sis Kasumi. "Where's Daddy?"

Kasumi inched towards Ranma, keeping her body turned towards Akane. There was a bit of unease readable on her face, annoying Akane somewhat. "He's at work, as usual…"

"I see." Ranma grimaced in advance as Akane asked her next question. "Where's Mommy then?"

Kasumi completely froze. They heard Nabiki drop a glass in the kitchen, coughing and sputtering.

"Nabiki…?" Akane called out.

"I'M FINE! I'm fine!" Nabiki replied at the same volume, walking back to the entrance. Looking at Akane, she crossed her arms, scowling. "Mom's not…" Her tone softened and she turned her head away. "Mom's not here."

Kasumi pulled her by the sleeve, and after an exchange of nods, they excused themselves and both went back to the kitchen.

"Awkward…" Akane muttered, head resting on the railing and her ankle bouncing up and down.

The interaction left Ranma scratching his neck, hand on his hip. It was rare to see Nabiki, of all people, be on the defensive. Looking back at the stairs, he almost missed Akane leaving him behind and he scrambled to keep up with her. "Where ya goin'?"

"I wanna see my room!" Akane explained, arriving at the landing. It took her a moment to find the right door, indicated by a swan-shaped plate with her name, and she turned the handle without wasting a beat.

Ranma was about to start deliberating whether to start looking for Shampoo or to stay with Akane, but seeing her dejected face made the decision easy. "What's wrong?"

Akane took a few careful steps into the room, looking around at the walls and furniture. There was her bed in the corner, her work table under the window, her wardrobe by the door, a wall dedicated to sports equipment, and a few plush toys strewn about. "Something's missing…"

Fearing the worst, Ranma looked around for anything that was out of place. Had Akane lost something? What had she been expecting that was so important as to distress her like this?

Akane raised her voice. "Where are the boy bands posters?" Ranma tripped on the carpet, facefaulting immediately. "No teenager room is complete without boy bands posters!"

Ranma quickly got back on his feet. "Where d'ya even get that idea from!?"

"Movies," Akane replied, tilting her head. "Thinking about it, I guess I wouldn't be into boy bands."

Ranma stared blankly at Akane, then heard something crash from the room next to them — his room. Quickly evaluating that Akane was safe, he left her to explore her own room and headed for his. Sliding the door open, he immediately spotted Shampoo, crouched in front of a bag as big as hers and rummaging through it. And, of course, a new hole where a wall used to be. He approached her and put a hand on her shoulder. "Shampoo!"

"Beloved!" she chirped, turning around and giving him a big smile that faded away quickly. "Oh. Brain demon." She went back to looking for something in her bag. "You stay here. I kill you soon."

Ranma took a deep breath. "Shampoo, this stops now! Undo whatever ya did to Akane and Ryoga!"

She glacially stared off into the distance for a moment. "Shampoo forgot she did that. No more 111." She let go of her bag and stood up. "How to remove brain demon now?"

Urgh, she would never listen to him like that. She wanted to talk to Ranko? Sure, he could do Ranko. How does he talk when he's in a Ranko mood again…? He tried his best imitation he could muster. "Now, uh… waitaminit here, Shampoo, I understand that ya wanna get rid of the, err… 'other' me, but right now what's more important is fixin' that thing you did to Akane and Ryoga!"

She looked him straight in the eyes and the sheer intensity of her gaze paralysed him.

"_Let me try,_" he heard at the back of his head.

"_Wha—? Who said that?_"

He closed his eyes and breathed in and out, slowly, until his shoulders relaxed and his pent up energy flowed out with the air leaving his lungs.

When he opened his eyes again, Shampoo was staring right into them with a smile. "Beloved!" She jumped at his neck and hugged tight.

While struggling out of her grasp with one arm, he was staring at the hand on his other one. What had he just done? What had just happened? One moment he was exasperated at himself, and he just kind of… pushed in. To… to try to do what? He certainly felt _Rankoey _at the moment, if that somehow made sense.

Ranko? He was Ranko? She? …That could be figured out later. But if Shampoo wanted Ranko, then she could be Ranko for now. She pulled Shampoo off of her and put her hands on Shampoo's shoulders. "This is serious. Please, can you just think for a minute about what you did?"

Shampoo blinked a few times, processing the demand. "Shampoo can't… kill man one without killing beloved. Shampoo… remove brain demon… remove memories that created it. But jealous girl attack, so… Shampoo used 111."

"No, I meant, like… That is what you literally did, but… Urgh." Ranko tried to find the right words to explain to Shampoo what should've been common ethical sense, but they refused to coalesce into something that would be convincing. Maybe if she just showed Shampoo the consequences of her actions…? If she brought Shampoo to Ryoga?

…Well, that was as good a plan as she had. She grabbed Shampoo's bag, pulled her by the hand and headed outside, finding Kasumi and Nabiki staring at Akane's door, Kasumi's knuckle hovering a few centimeters away from it.

"…Is everything alright?" Ranko asked.

The two sisters turned their heads. Kasumi smiled a bit sadly. "Ranko-chan…"

Nabiki leaned against the wall, holding the bag of ice against her head. "When Akane was a kid, and Mom died… Well, with Dad already shaken, we kind of shielded Akane from that realization. In hindsight it wasn't our smartest idea."

Kasumi finished the thought. "If the current situation might as well be used for something, it is as an opportunity to set right a wrong, shouldn't it?"

Ranko looked at them in worry when a sudden bout of pain flared up underneath her forehead. Something felt… angry in her mind. If Shampoo was not gonna listen to her in her usual mood, then she had to make the most out of her current energy while she still had it. She stopped wasting time and pulled Shampoo downstairs and into the street, heading to Dr. Tofu's office as quickly as possible.

Akane was flipping through her math textbook and its complicated material when the door to her room opened behind her. She turned around to find her two big sis bearing serious expressions. "Kasumi? Nabiki?"

Nabiki sat down in the nearest chair, placing the bag of ice on her head again. "Do the talking, Kasumi. I'm just here for emotional support."

"Right, right… Akane-chan? It's about Mom. It's bad news."

"Oh." Akane sat down on her bed. "Is she not gonna be home today?"

Kasumi opened her mouth a few times, before taking a deep breath, her hands clasped tight. "She died when you were six."

Akane's heart stopped for a second. Her head recoiled at the thought, then she frowned. "How did it happen?"

"We were at school when it happened. Dad told us that he and Mom were training in the dojo when she suddenly started coughing up blood… and then it happened very fast. The ambulance couldn't have come quickly enough."

Akane lifted up her knees to hug her legs. Well, death was just something that happened sometimes, she knew that. Everybody knew that. It bothered her that it was Mommy, but… But as soon as she thought this, she felt her eyes tear up quickly. This wasn't fair. She wasn't okay.

Kasumi came in to hug her, gently caressing her behind her head. "It's okay… Let it all out… We're here…"

Akane started sobbing in Kasumi's shoulder. It wasn't fair! Mommy was so strong, she would never die like that! There's always a risk when exerting your body, but… Just go from healthy to dead?

"When it first happened," Nabiki spoke up, "we were scared telling you would make you renounce martial arts, or worse. We were scared you wouldn't understand it, or that it'd traumatize you for life." She lowered her head. "It probably did more harm than good. You didn't get to grieve. It wasn't okay."

A memory flashed in Akane's mind. She was asking where Mommy was, and Daddy just stared off into the distance. Kasumi butted in and said Mommy would be back soon. When was that?

"Just let it all out… It's okay…" Kasumi whispered into her ear, still holding her tight.

Another memory. Someone at school bullying her… no, pitying her. She hadn't liked that. People were looking at her differently, treating her differently. She didn't understand why; they didn't have a problem with how she acted before. But desperate to fit in, she started to act more femininely, more normally… As much as she could, at least. She didn't want to stand out anymore. Boys were still annoying, but hanging out with girls felt weird… And she had to not be weird. Saying that girls were pretty was weird too, that also had to go. Akane was normal, not weird, not… not like the other tomboys. Not like she was before she stopped being weird. Of course, at some point, she had figured out that Mom had died, but… nobody in the family ever talked about it, so she didn't either. And then that's how it was. That's how it was as she continued through school, as middle school came and went, as she started high school… Until Ranma came into the picture.

And that idiot… that idiot had dug so many feelings back up, with constant weirdness and teasing.

Akane was slowly breathing into Kasumi's shoulder. She tried to pull her head away before being hit by a second wave of sorrow and crying loudly again.

It was okay. She had a lot to let out.

Ranko rang the doorbell again and headed straight for Dr. Tofu's office, Shampoo still in tow. She put the Chinese girl's backpack down near the entrance. "Is Ryoga feeling any better?" she asked Dr. Tofu, who was sitting at their desk.

"Well, I have determined he is also under the effect of shampoo 111, if that is what you're asking." They looked at Shampoo. "Is this the girl that did this?"

Ranko nodded.

"_Nihao,_" Shampoo said monotonically, looking at the shape shaking on the bed. "Oh, is pig boy."

Ranko cut to the chase. "Shampoo, _you _did this."

"What?" Shampoo said. "But… Shampoo only go back to childhood. Why is pig boy this way?"

Ranko turned to Shampoo and started shouting. "Not everyone's childhood is happy, Shampoo! Who knows what nightmare you sent him back to!?" She paused, shocked at her own words. Where had that come from?

Shampoo was visibly spooked, emotions readable on her face for a change.

Ranko turned back to Ryoga. He did look like… like what she had blurted out was correct, even if she didn't know how she had guessed like that, nor how she could just recognize it. She leaned towards him, shaking him by the shoulder. "Ryoga?"

The boy shuddered. "I'm so alone…"

"Let's give them a few minutes of privacy," Tofu said, pulling Shampoo aside and into the lobby.

After watching them leave, Ranko turned back to Ryoga, lifted him under his arms, and into a hug. Her head was starting to ache; she had to talk while she still could. "I can't say I know what you went through before we met. I don't know what's put you in that state, but… I'm here, okay? Sure, it doesn't feel great right now, but it'll feel better eventually. It gets better. Things can and do change. In the future, well, future for you, you find me. Even when we got separated, you went to the ends of the world to find me again, and you succeeded. So… whatever it is that's putting you in that state… it won't be forever."

"Ranma…" Ryoga muttered in between sobs, now the one crushing Ranko into a hug.

"_Well, not exactly,_" Ranko thought. She smiled softly. If he could remember her name, then her work was done.

Dr. Tofu poked their head in, then smiled, seeing that Ryoga seemed to look much better.

Shampoo slipped in and reached for her bag, rummaging inside for a few moments before pulling out a bottle of 119.

Ranko's eye twitched. "…Wait a minute, you had one all along?"

Shampoo shook her head. "Would be reckless to carry memory shampoo without antidote. Nobody do that."

The pain in Ranma's forehead suddenly flared and he felt hot anger overtake him. He was so mad, so utterly livid. He wanted to shout and scream at Shampoo for doing something so wicked without thinking about the consequences first. He just wanted to let it all out, all his frustration that had built up for the past hour after feeling like he hadn't even been himself. But the anger grew colder the longer he stared Shampoo down. As much as he felt she deserved it, it wouldn't be the man amongst men thing to do. Instead, he didn't even want to deal with her. He was boiling up inside, but it would stay inside. "Ryoga, we're leavin'." He snatched the bottle out of Shampoo's hands, headed for the door without skipping a beat, and Ryoga scrambled to follow.

Akane let go of her sister and wiped the tears on her cheeks. That had been a lot of memories she didn't remember suddenly coming back to the surface. "Thank you, Kasumi. I needed that."

Some time during the past hour, Nabiki had gone from her chair to standing next to Kasumi and Akane. "So, are you back with us?" she asked.

"Yeah. That was… an experience," Akane admitted.

Kasumi smiled. "What day isn't with Ranko-chan around…" The situation defused, she suddenly frowned. "I'm not sure I'll have the time to finish tonight's dinner, now…"

Akane bounced up from her bed and pulled back her sleeves. "That's fine, let me help!"

"NO!" the two older sisters blurted out in unison.

"I mean," Nabiki continued, "you should still rest, right? Let me do it."

Akane pouted. "Well, shouldn't you too then?"

"Takeout it is, then…" Kasumi headed out. "Probably not Japanese cuisine, since I don't think any of the nearby restaurants that do delivery beat my cooking?"

Ranma rushed back home, eager to use the 119 on Akane. He didn't expect to find the Tendo sisters all sat around the living room table and seemingly having a moment he was catching the tail end of.

Akane let out a long laugh. "Did you even remember you wanted to be an 'evil scientist'?"

Nabiki seemed unfazed, her elbow on the table and her head resting on top of her hand. "Look, schemes pay well, don't they?" Spotting Ranma and Ryoga coming in behind him, she took a slightly more pensive expression. "Hmm…"

"Ranko-chan! Ryoga-kun!" Kasumi exclaimed. "We'll be having pizzas tonight, if you could take a look at the menu and find something you'd enj—"

Ranma threw the bottle of 119 on the ground so hard it broke apart. "I AIN'T RANKO! THERE IS NO RANKO! I AM RANMA SAOTOME!"

Silence.

"...Beloved?" Shampoo's voice came from behind him. So she had followed them after all.

And his patience had worn thin. He was tired of the constant game of who knew what, who believed what. He was tired of Shampoo going after him. And after this afternoon, he found it much easier to shake her off. "Kasumi. Gonna need hot water."

It was well into the evening at this point. Soun had come back home to find the family standing outside, near the koi pond, Ranma holding a teapot in his hand.

"I ain't gonna do that twice. Watch closely, Shampoo." Ranma lifted the teapot above his head and solemnly dumped its contents on his head, his red hair turning black, followed quickly by his body turning back to normal.

Shampoo stared at him, processing what she had just saw. "Jusenkyo. Shampoo thought…"

Ranma stared back. "Yeah. Ya thought it was goin' in the other direction when ya checked. But truth is I ain't a gal. My name's Ranma. Not Ranko. There ain't no brain demon, there ain't no other me. There's just me. And I'm a guy."

Shampoo struggled to keep her emotions off her face. She grit her teeth, tears pearling at the corner of her eyes. "…Man one lies." She reflexively positioned her hands like she was holding her chuí. "Ranko exists… She does…"

Ranma continued to stare her down, until she broke into tears and ran off. A pang of guilt took him, but it was better that way. It had to be done.

The family (including Genma, who came out of his hiding spot the moment Shampoo left) moved back to the living room to start on eating dinner. The ambiance was grim and tense, Akane herself barely touching her food. She looked up from her plate. "Dad?"

"Yes?" Soun answered.

"Could we move Mom's butsudan to the entrance?"

He stared off into space, contemplating, before nodding.

Satisfied, Akane turned back to her food, before catching a sneering smile on Ranma's face from the corner of her eye that quickly made her frown. "What?"

"Nothin', I was just thinkin' about the boy band posters thing…" He said.

Akane growled. "Boohoo, unlike you, I've actually learned things since I was a kid."

Ranma slammed his hands on the table, standing up. "What's that supposed to mean!?"

Akane put her slice of pizza back down. "Just last week you were wondering what crêpes were called in French!"

"Ryoga finds his way to Paris all the time! Sorry for bein' curious!"

"Don't drag me into this…" the pig boy muttered, hiding his face behind his pizza box.

Nabiki picked up hers and left the room.

Akane stuck out her tongue at Ranma, who stuck his out right back.

"Uncute tomboy!"

"Bipolar disaster!"

"Of course it couldn't last…" Kasumi muttered, holding her hand against her cheek, a slightly amused smile on her face.

"Of course it couldn't last," Nabiki stated, eating her last slice of pizza and leaving the box on the kitchen counter to be discarded with the recyclables. An evil scientist, eh? Quite the childhood dream there. Though, in a roundabout way, it did give her a few ideas… She went back to her room to find a Chinese dictionary, some paper and a few pens. If she had to guess, Shampoo had forgotten her bag at Tofu's office, considering she didn't have it with her when she came back. If Nabiki was quick, she could probably catch Shampoo before she left for good… And that would be perfect for the most ambitious scheme Nabiki had ever come up with.

* * *

If you're interested in my original works, or just more transfeminine fiction in general, I've got a discord you're cordially invited to check out! We're a plural positive, pro inclusivity space with plenty of kindly people to meet. discord dot gg /VDVMVrc


	14. A Normal Day in Nerima

This chapter was quite a pain to get done, for reasons unknown. I was just pooped out for an entire month or so, barely able to put some words on the page every once in a while, until the last week or so. Hopefully the trend continues.

Special shoutout to everybody that helped with the editing, including but not limited to Trismegistus Shandy, Saffron, Katie, and the members of the queer Ranma fandom discord.

* * *

If there was one thing Akane was good at, it was sports. Before Tatewaki had convinced the boys of the school to run after her, it wasn't unusual for her to be invited as a replacement onto any sports team that was down a member for a match or another. The exceptions like gymnastics were few and far between, and were usually due to her skillset being skewed towards brute force more than grace — not that she was lacking in either. The point is she knew the basics in most things, and that's why she thought, after the crazy, and more importantly, emotionally exhausting past month since Ranma first came to Nerima (had it only been so little time?), that a Sunday at the municipal sports center's ice rink was the perfect way to cool off for her, Ranma and Ryoga.

Of course, what she hadn't expected was for Ranma on ice skates to have all the grace of a knocked-over flan.

"What's that, Ranma? Can't even stand on your own two feet?" Ryoga taunted as he passed him by, arms smugly crossed across his torso, while momentum was carrying him backwards on a direct collision course with one of the rink's edges.

Ryoga wasn't any better, in fact.

Akane rolled her eyes, skating by to assess the damage. Ranma was desperately trying to stand back up on his own two feet but was only managing as far as raising his butt up high before falling back down.

He looked up at her like a lost kitten and raised his hand, begging for her to grab it. "Akane…" he muttered.

"Good grief…" With another sigh, she pulled him up in half a second. He stayed stable for about as long before his legs started to wobble and he ended up having to catch himself on her waist to avoid falling again. "Look, it's not that hard. You've learned how to walk on a tightrope for gymnastics, right? It's about the same thing, except instead of walking it's gliding, and you get two tightropes, one for each foot." She resumed moving forward, pulling him along with her.

His legs wobbled some more, and he was whimpering a bit. "It's just not the same with these shoes…"

While Ranma was somewhat handled, Akane threw a glance at Ryoga just to make sure he was safe as well. He seemed to have found himself a teacher in the form of a young girl in a pink leotard with a matching ribbon in her hair.

The grip of Ranma's hands tightened on Akane's shirt. She looked back at him. He was glancing around at the other people on the rink, his sight jumping from one to the next with worry upon his face.

"What's wrong?" she asked.

"I… don't know. It's like they're all looking at me… It's embarrassing…"

Akane scanned the rink and found out they, in fact, weren't. Not that that seemed to help Ranma's state. Was he feeling self-conscious, perhaps? That wasn't usual for him… Akane quickly corrected herself. That wasn't usual for him half the time. So this was probably… well.

Since Ranma's big show of declaring he was the only one in his head, he had growled and snapped at anybody who even entertained the possibility he was wrong; and his softer mood's appearances had been very rare and short. But, truthfully, that didn't stop Akane from thinking this other mood was more than just that, as she had already started to believe before Shampoo came into the picture. There was something there, even if Ranma was incapable of admitting it to himself. There was a Ranko.

Ranko's hands slipped and she fell to the ground once more. Is it appropriate to think of Ranma's other half as a girl even in guy form? Akane idly mused, while Ranko's expression of fear was replaced by annoyance and she quickly pulled off her skates in a very agitated fashion, signaling the usual jerk was back, before sprinting out of the rink and into the nearest corridor. Akane didn't even have the time to ask what he was doing.

When he next came back, water was still dripping out of his red hair.

Genma and Soun solemnly locked eyes with one another. If it weren't for the sound of the cicadas and the smell of Kasumi's baking, they almost would've believed themselves in another world — just them, facing each other, a shogi table between them.

So was their ritual on lazy days. The scores were one hundred and five to one hundred and three, in Soun's favor of course.

Most games were spent in near silence, though most didn't mean all. Still relatively often, as was the case for this one, they would be talking out the affairs of the family's life.

Soun preferred to keep his strategy to himself, starting with the flexible bishop's opening. As his opponent stared at the board, carefully considering his response, Soun spoke gravely. "I wonder if we have been too harsh on the kids lately."

Genma replied with a symmetrical move, and grumbled. "Bah! Ranma is used to tough love, he's been raised on the thing. I am merely doing what it takes to teach the kid to be a real man."

Soun nodded, stacking his spy under his captain. "Was this really for the best, though? Shouldn't you have let Ranma decide who to become on his own?"

Genma stroked his chin. "You might be right… but you know just as well as I that there were circumstances. I did what I needed to protect him. That is all." He picked up a lotus tile from his pile and placed it in the center of the board.

Soun frowned, unsure how to dig himself out of this masterstroke move. Suddenly, he saw the play, and moved his knight to c3, before considering his friend's words. "You mean… With Happo—"

"No." Genma clenched his fists. "That monster is long gone, and is not coming back. I'm talking about the boy's mother." Genma played a yellow +2 card.

Soun drew from the card stack, then rolled a 7 and landed on the last orange property. Buying it and therefore completing his triple, he proceeded to build two houses on each. He locked eyes with Genma once more.

The two men stayed silent, appraising one another, wondering who would speak first.

"The author has no idea how shogi is played, do they?" Soun asked.

Once more, Genma solemnly crossed his arms and nodded.

"Waitwaitwaitwaitwaitslowdownwaitwaitpleaseaaaa—"

Akane slowed from a snail's pace to one befitting bureaucracy and rolled her eyes. Ranma was still hanging onto her for dear life, with little difference from how he'd acted before swapping to his other form. "If it was embarrassing before, I don't see how it is any less now."

Ranma shook his head a bit. "Guys look like fools when they can't skate…! It just ain't the same for girls, they end up lookin' cute instead!"

"Ah, yes, female helplessness, perfect for gaining sympathy," Akane replied in a monotone. She grabbed Ranma's hands and detached herself from their grasp.

"AKANEEEE!" Ranma wailed, arms swinging wildly as he tried to keep his balance as best he could, while Akane simply skated away towards Ryoga and his new friend.

The girl was gently leading Ryoga along, holding him by both hands. "That's it… That's it… You're doing great, Charlotte!" Ryoga had a surprisingly blissful expression on his face, not something Akane was used to seeing on him.

"Charlotte?" Akane stopped herself next to them, getting their attention.

Ryoga snapped out of it and grew beet red. "Oh, uh, Akane, uh… Akane, this is Azusa."

The girl lifted a hand way up and waved with a smile. "Hi! I'm Azusa Shiratori! Are you a friend of Charlotte?"

The nickname didn't seem to bother Ryoga, so Akane shrugged it off. "Hmm! I hope he isn't bothering you."

"Oh no no no, it's a pleasure of mine to be helping such a cute thing. My partner hasn't arrived yet, anyways." She glanced at the entrance of the rink and pouted, muttering to herself. "Sheesh, Mikado, what a way to keep a lady waiting…"

Another "'KANEEE!" shriek pierced the air.

"…I'll leave you two to it, then; have fun," Akane said with a sigh before heading back to her fiancé. She caught him and dragged him away from his slow collision course with the wall.

Ranma growled under his breath. "Took ya long enough, ya uncute tomboy."

Akane ignored the jeer. To be fair, she did deserve it a bit. She turned her head back to P-chan and his new friend, then mused aloud. "Does Ryoga seem less… depressed to you lately?"

"Hmm?" Ranma struggled to snach his gaze away from his shaky feet and towards Ryoga. He observed him for a moment before going back to focusing on his skates. "I must'a got thru to him the other day, I guess."

Akane kept her grimace to herself. Ranma already hadn't been prone to self reflection when they first met, but now that he had dug his heels in, getting his thoughts on anything often led to the equivalent of a grunt and going back to what he'd been doing, just like he had done just now.

As Ranma's knees shook in unison and he was not getting any closer to steadying himself, Akane readjusted her grip by holding him by the shoulders, hoping to stabilize him. The task was easier said than done; Ranma and gravity seemed to make an attractive couple today, and if Akane were to be honest, she was struggling to stay focused herself. First it was an observation of the height difference between Ranma's male and female forms, which morphed into a hard-to-define feeling over realising that he had to look up at her face while a woman, then those thoughts drifted further and made Akane wonder whether she would get other opportunities to carry him like that time going back home from Tofu's office.

"Woah!" Ranma's skates slipped, and Akane's distracted thoughts scrambled to get back to the present. She barely managed to spin him around and catch him by the waist, narrowly avoiding a fall at the cost of locking eyes in a precarious position. Both teens caught their breath for a split moment before letting them out in sync. Ranma's cheeks gradually turned scarlet, and he softly grabbed Akane's shoulders to steady himself. "Thank you…"

"Any time, Ranko…" Akane muttered, effortlessly using the right name without even noticing, her thoughts stuck in a loop about how cute the shorter redhead looked when she dropped the invulnerable facade.

Her whole misadventure with the 111 shampoo had opened the floodgates for many feelings Akane was now woefully underprepared for.

Putting a name on them would be but a formality at this point, but one she had every intention to drag her feet over.

Disrespectful.

That was, in one word, how Kasumi would describe Shampoo's short stay at the Tendos' — especially her refusal to engage with the snacks the host, that is, Kasumi herself, had offered her.

This basic refusal to engage with house etiquette infuriated Kasumi. It was the most evilest, most awfulest thing in the world. Not respecting etiquette! She fanned herself at the thought. The last thing she would ever let happen was having her reputation as a house host be sullied.

And thus, today she would be focusing on figuring out the sugary treats the Chinese girl seemed to love so. Fueled by her pride, Kasumi would make sure to be more than prepared for when Shampoo would come by again.

She would rise to the challenge with a smile! In fact, she was already planning to go further beyond than ever. From the highest shelf of the most out of the way cupboard of the kitchen, she had pulled out a very dusty book of recipes, one left untouched since her mother's departure. Her mom's pastry diary, detailing all the sweets she had planned to make the family over the years.

That book had been overwhelming to Kasumi when she was younger. But now she knew herself to be up for the challenge, both in terms of her cooking skills, and emotionally.

Once the food for tonight was ready to be put on a slow boil, she pulled out the eggs, milk, butter, sugar and other assorted things, checked on the adults in the living room — they were using their shogi table for ping pong — tightened her lucky apron and got herself ready to follow some recipes.

After some time of teaching Ranko how to skate without falling over, the student in question barely more receptive than the other half known as Ranma, an alarm had rung asking all skaters to vacate the rink for a few minutes. Apparently Ryoga's new teacher had turned out to be a martial artist herself, and once her partner had arrived, they had requested the rink for their daily training, which apparently consisted of beating up a hundred fully-geared hockey players, for some reason. Neriman martial artists… At least, the timing had been perfect to allow for the ice cream break that had sold Ranma on the trip in the first place, the shop neatly located right against the ice court.

The individual in question was nearly ripping his skates off his feet, clearly eager to be done with them. "Ice skatin' sucks!" Ranma complained.

"Of course an uncultured swine like you would dislike such a distinguished thing," Ryoga retorted with all the confidence of somebody that wouldn't have agreed a couple hours ago, his arms crossed. Clearly Azusa had turned his opinion around.

"Yer more of a swine than I, pig boy." Ranma stuck his tongue out and, his feet now free, headed straight for the cashier to make his order for the chocolate double fruity banana-strawberry parfait he had eyed on the menu.

"Ordering anything, P-chan?" Akane said.

Ryoga shook his head, his attention on Azusa and her friend's training. "I'm good."

"Same here." Akane stretched for a moment, turned her head to catch a glance at the piling mess of defeated grunts, and heard a sigh coming from Ryoga. He tried not to show it, but he had a little smile at the corners of his mouth. "So what's the story for her calling you Charlotte?"

Ryoga snapped out of it, looking bashful. "I don't know? She said I was adorable and just started calling me that… Not that I don't know better, I couldn't possibly actually be. Something must've caught me off guard."

Akane looked back at the girl with her frilly sportswear and impeccably styled wavy hair… She had an innocent air to her that was certainly attractive… to a crowd of people that would be attracted to women. Which someone relevant at this table (Ryoga, stupid brain, it's Ryoga) was a part of. "Maybe you have a crush on her?"

The question gave Ryoga pause. He straightened himself, slamming his palms on the table. "That's ridiculous. It's impossible to have a crush on multiple people at once."

Akane did a double take, unsure if she had heard that correctly at first. "What do you mean?"

Ryoga spoke with confidence. "Well, there are some people that do, otherwise love triangles wouldn't exist in romance novels. But sadly, as awesome as it is, I couldn't be one of them. Having just one girlfriend would be too much to keep up with as is, I would never have the energy to spare."

Akane smiled. "You read romance novels?"

"Mh?" Ryoga froze. "Please forget anything I just said."

Her smile turned into a grin. "What happened to your 'Everything is for everyone' attitude from the gymnastics tournament, P-chan?"

Ranma slammed a glass the size of his head and filled with ice cream down on the table. "I'm back! What were ya talkin' about?"

"NOTHING!" Ryoga growled, making Akane giggle.

Kodachi opened the door to room nine. A sterile atmosphere greeted her, white walls and the rest of the room matching it, with a pale sky blue crayon-like brushstroke pattern as the only speck of color allowed on the linoleum flooring. Three beds were set at a reasonable distance from one another, with her brother placed in the furthest one by the window. The poor man was adorned with a full body cast, and a machine stuck on his wrist, beeping along with his pulse.

As she made her approach and Tatewaki spotted her, he took on a grave expression and spoke up. "Why are you here, sister of mine? Have you come to torment me?"

"Oh, brother dearest…" Kodachi stopped by his side, clutching her purse. "As much as we do not always see eye to eye, you do know I care about you, don't you? I merely came to see how you were doing."

Tatewaki's face relaxed, and he went back to staring at the ceiling. "So it is… I am afraid I will not be getting out of this room anytime soon."

"How long have the doctors inferred it will take you to heal?" Kodachi took a nearby chair, moving it to sit down by his bed.

"A month, they said, at least, and if I were to be a lucky man! They ruled that only a superhuman could hope to heal as many broken bones as I have in as little as two weeks."

Kodachi shook her head low. "A shame, brother dearest. A shame."

"How is the residence by yourself? I can only imagine such a gigantic manor must feel quite empty… Not to mention groundskeeping."

"Worry not, brother dearest. Sasuke as always keeps me company, and makes sure your usual rooms are kept clean and primed for your return."

"Company? I cannot imagine this ninja being a good one."

"Oh ho ho ho ho ho! You would be surprised." Kodachi suddenly felt a jolt pass through her, and all her senses came to full attention. Her neck straightened, and she scanned for the source of the disturbance she'd just felt.

"Could it be…?" Tatewaki muttered, eyes equally at the ready.

"It must be…!" Kodachi raised her hand to her mouth, leaping to a standing position.

Their voices resonated in unison. "An old granny needs help crossing the street!" Tatewaki jumped up straight and puffed out his torso, shattering his cast in a million pieces. Called by the duty of good deeds, the Kuno siblings rushed outside as one.

Ranma couldn't exactly deny he'd had a couple rough days last week. Between Shampoo and the shampoo, his nerves had been stretched thin. Not that he exactly disliked the Chinese girl, how unchivalrous would that be, but he definitely hoped she would stay away for good. He had enough on his plate with school, living at the Tendos, martial arts, and yearning to be a true man amongst men.

The parfait had helped, of course it had, he'd always had a weakness for it, but even that hadn't exactly managed to keep his mind off the elephant in the room.

See, while he might love ice cream, it was also great at calming his temper. That might sound like a good thing, in theory.

In practice, he had never felt less like himself than when he wasn't angry, lately. That was the entire issue. When he let himself go with the flow… It was as if he stopped being himself anymore. And that was terrifying. Between that, his intermittent affection for the name Ranko, and the girl from his dreams…

He feared he was dying. That someone else was trying to take over — permanently.

But a true Saotome, a true man amongst men, never backs down from a challenge. He might've had no idea what was causing this, but he was determined all the same to destroy this thing before it destroyed him.

"...Right, Ranma?" Akane's voice suddenly tore him out of his thoughts and back into the present. They had been walking home for a dozen minutes and were steadily approaching the Tendo residence, his hand holding Ryoga's tight to make sure he wouldn't get lost.

He blinked a few times. "What were we talkin' about?"

"You had fun at the skating rink too, right?" Akane repeated, grumbling at him to watch his words while nudging her head towards a content Ryoga.

Ranma wasn't in the mood to humor her. "I'd rather I'd stayed home!"

Akane huffed. "Well if that's so, maybe we'll just go Ryoga and I next time, and call it a date!"

"EEEEH! Akane, ya can't be serious!? You're my fiancée! You'd date Ryoga just to spite me!?" Ranma balled his fists. "Ryoga, tell 'er off! ...Ryoga?"

At the lack of response, Ranma turned his head to glance at what the heck had Ryoga so entranced. He was pointing at the two warships in the backyard of the Tendos firing at each other.

"Come on in," Dr. Tofu said as they heard a knock at the door of their office. As the door slid and the Tendo middle sister popped from the other side, they gave her a smile. "Nabiki, what a pleasure it is to see you. What brings you here?"

"Yo, Tofu. I thought you might wanna look at this." She approached and handed them a brown mail package that had yet to be unwrapped. "Read it at the library the other day, and thought you might want to have a copy of your own on hand. Consider it a thanks for handling the translation work of my little side business."

Untying the little string and unwrapping the contents, they found inside a psychology book titled 'Plurality, Multiplicity and Dissociative Identity Disorder: an Introduction.' Stricken with a feeling this might be related to Ranma, they placed it down on their table. "I cannot say psychology is my field of expertise, but this is appreciated. I'll read it as quickly as I can. Anything else?"

Nabiki rested her back against the doorframe. "As a matter of fact, have you received any news of my order?"

"You're in luck! There was a letter this morning." Dr. Tofu opened a drawer and pulled out a colorful rainbow postcard that seemed to come from the Jusenkyo springs' gift shop, if the logo in the corner was any indication. "They're handling the logistics of getting it shipped overseas. There was apparently a minor incident involving the Maonīchuan, but they didn't detail it further. It should be here soon." They handed Nabiki the card, and she flipped it in her hands a couple times, looking at the illustrations.

Slowly, a grin made its way on her face. "Dr. Tofu, I cannot stress enough how rich this is all about to make me."


End file.
